How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
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I woke up at my usual time and ALL of my small children are sleeping still, which hasn't happened in a very long time. My husband's also sleeping which I kinda wish he weren't so we could relax together, but I'm glad he gets to sleep in with no distractions- a bit over an hour now from their usual wake-up time. I'm having my coffee hot, I have the thermostat to my preferred specifications, and I'm going to play a bit of muh witch and wizard game by myself. Having kids is a blessing and I'm always happy to spend time with them, but I totally forgot what it's like to have a morning to myself and be alone with my thoughts lmao.
 
I'm pressed about upcoming redundancy - my own job is safe but the imposing income loss for my husband is shadowing over us like the sword of Damocles so I'm rather hoping a fruitful job application replies. That said, own job is stressful lately due to losing high double-figure numbers in Turkey and it's had an unwelcome ripple effect. So, in all seriousness, things could be better, but I've had some wholesome family time with the nieces and nephews which kind of eased the pain. We also found a campyass show on Amazon Prime we all like so we're all cuddling the dog and watching it this fine Sunday :)
 
I live in the middle of nowhere suburbia. I figured out what one of my friends was doing to see me more often, it's extremely sweet in a sad but super specific way. Probably won't happen nearly as often, but makes me wish I still saw her all the time.
 
Yeah, I got a good job and it pays well. But fuck my home life and social life are just falling apart. Seems like people only pretend to care, or offer help then when the person they offer that all too actually is in the shit they just run away, kicking dirt in your face, acting two faced as fuck.

fuck Im a retarded faggot for venting this shit on a site where its just a bunch of random internet strangers laughing at retards. But fuck I've had a strong temptation to Ronnie McNut myself the past month and fuck if those shells starring at me from the corner of my room don't make it tempting.

much love to ya all.
 
Neurotypical Mantis dijo:
i may be showing symptoms of grief but at least i have.... uh.... uhhhhhhhhh
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friend update:
he emailed me back possibly the worst case scenario.
he told me he's planning on killing himself in the next 3 years. going to try my absolute best to make him reconsider.
 
Just fine, thank you (I'm not psychotic at all).
63D883CA-C3FB-47FC-9EF4-B4E746FB3F7F.jpeg
 
Shidoen dijo:
I could be better and I could be worse.
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At least you're not in a hearse.

Yes, I'm poet of the year, I know.

In all seriousness, I'm doing fairly well. Finished the last big test in my course, the only ones I have left now are shorter. Been getting high and listening to jazz a lot too. I should really take a break from vaping marijuana since it screws up my breathing and gives me a Tommy Tooter aroma minus the body odour, but I always use more when I'm busy or overworked. When it's the only little break I get, it's a lot more tempting.

My cat is being a cat. She's a good girl. It amazes me just how affectionate she is, she's more cuddly than my dog.
 
Past couple of days I got a sore throat and flu and woke up this morning feeling like I got hit by a truck. Vomited into the toilet and stumbled around my apartment like I had my energy drained. Thankfully I'm mostly better and it looks like I won't be missing any work. (Knock on wood)
 
Neurotypical Mantis dijo:
he told me he's planning on killing himself in the next 3 years. going to try my absolute best to make him reconsider.
Presiona para expandir...
I've been saying that for over 20 years. It does feel like i need to start making serious arrangements for the next three years though as the walls are finally closing in.
 
Annoyed that a place I applied for a job at doesn't have its shit together. Probably dodged a bullet by not getting hired there considering they gave times for when they're available for interviews but then disappeared less than half way through the day. Maybe I'm a dummy for not taking the "first come, first served" thing seriously. idk. I tried confirming the interview time but never got a response, so I wore good clothes for nothing. What a waste.
 
Apparently my half-brother died, so that's not good. I didn't grow up with him so I don't particularly care, but now I have to focus on watching my mother (help her through it), that's basically the worst case scenario for someone up there with death of spouse and death of parent. The year seems to be an escalating cavalcade of disasters.
 
Unfortunately, I'm currently inside an EMT vehicle as my father had slight trouble breathing and has a slurred speech from taking his medicine.

He's currently really old and I was told that he almost slipped and hit his head in the family bathroom.
 
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