💼 Careercow Hayden Black - Untalented comedian with a string of failures including the infamous Gen Zed; suspended from Twitter

[JU 199]

Done.

That's fucking beautiful.

So...yeah.. (seriously, legit cap, not modded)

Hahahahahahahahaha

 

[Orthodox Chrischanity]

Now we need one for Betsy. "Don't worry guys, I'll cover this month. Just remember to go to the warehouse and get my package. Ask for "El Burro".

 

[女鬼]

I decided to go digging through their Instagram accounts for a bit. It's mostly screencaps of their tweets, but there are some gems.

Hayden would like to preface this by saying he likes the idea of fucking dogs.



Hayden really loves joking about paedos and molesters for some reason.

Hayden has issues with his mother.


Then again, Hayden really has issues with his mother.

 

[VLAD]

Hayden really loves joking about paedos and molesters for some reason.

Because they're even easier targets than he is, and that's saying something.

pew pew

 

[APerson]

I decided to go digging through their Instagram accounts for a bit. It's mostly screencaps of their tweets, but there are some gems.

Hayden would like to preface this by saying he likes the idea of fucking dogs.
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Hayden really loves joking about paedos and molesters for some reason.

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Hayden has issues with his mother.
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Then again, Hayden really has issues with his mother.

He's got almost as many problems with his religion.
And Jewish mothers like airline food.
Offending everyone equally!
I HAZ SUCH THE FEELS! SATURDAY?

 

[JU 199]

https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/capture-d%E2%80%99e%CC%81cran-2015-12-14-a%CC%80-02-44-58-png.63458/

"Come on! You know you'd pork her too!

Pew Pew"

 

[AnOminous]

He's got almost as many problems with his religion.

Amazing. Jews making jokes about being Jewish is comedy on easy mode.

He can't even be funny in that tried and true genre.

Hayden just sucks at everything.

 

[Chubby_Penguin]

He's got almost as many problems with his religion.
[MEDIA=twitter]167860117595881473[/MEDIA]And Jewish mothers like airline food.
[MEDIA=twitter]586304162469548033[/MEDIA][MEDIA=twitter]506631209665822721[/MEDIA]Offending everyone equally!
[MEDIA=twitter]18235423092383744[/MEDIA][MEDIA=twitter]123183024438394880[/MEDIA]I HAZ SUCH THE FEELS! SATURDAY?
[MEDIA=twitter]244452092125798400[/MEDIA]

Screenshots just in case:

Spoiler

 

[NegaCWC]

Wow, Justin Beiber is such a bad musician that I'd rather watch Fox News instead! Man, hipsters are so annoying I'd rather watch the Star Wars Prequels! Huh, I went shopping on Black Friday and people were fighting over Whole Foods bags! Dang autocorrect, I meant douchebags!

And what's the deal with airline food?

Pew pew.

The Columbine used to be my favorite flower until 1999.

Pew pew!

 

[AnOminous]

He's got almost as many problems with his religion.
[MEDIA=twitter]167860117595881473[/MEDIA]

Yeah, I'm responding to this one again, just because.

I don't doubt Hayden is Jewish because of his nose, but because he has no sense of humor whatsoever.

I wonder if he really is Jewish. And whether it's both parents or just one. And whether it's his mother or father.

If only there were a Wikipedia article!

Pew! Pew!

 

[女鬼]

Yeah, I'm responding to this one again, just because.

I don't doubt Hayden is Jewish because of his nose, but because he has no sense of humor whatsoever.

I wonder if he really is Jewish. And whether it's both parents or just one. And whether it's his mother or father.

If only there were a Wikipedia article!

Pew! Pew!

He described himself as a British Jew in the Mary Sue article.

Lol identity politics.

 

[Abby]

He described himself as a British Jew in the Mary Sue article.

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Lol identity politics.

Neither his looks or his name appear Jewish. It's hip to pretend to be Jewish in show business these days though.

 

[APerson]

Neither his looks or his name appear Jewish. It's hip to pretend to be Jewish in show business these days though.

Are you saying there are more English Jedi than Jews, he admits he hasn't been to shul since his bar mitzvah, and Black isn't a Jewish name? Gasp!

 

[Alberto Balsalm]

He described himself as a British Jew in the Mary Sue article.

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Lol identity politics.

Julie's not into men, huh?

Explains why Hayden had to hire a hooker.

 

[AnOminous]

Are you saying there are more English Jedi than Jews, he admits he hasn't been to shul since his bar mitzvah, and Black isn't a Jewish name? Gasp!

At least he's not a schvartze.

 

[Adamska]

Neither his looks or his name appear Jewish. It's hip to pretend to be Jewish in show business these days though.

This would not shock me, considering the list of lies Hayden Black has already spewed out of his vile face hole.

 

[VLAD]

This would not shock me, considering the list of lies Hayden Black has already spewed out of his vile face hole.

As I said earlier in the thread, Hayden's about as Jewish as he is funny. If he is one of the Chosen People, though, he's doing a great job of single-handedly debunking the conspiracy theory about us owning the media.

 

[JU 199]

He just isn't very good at this.

 

[Orthodox Chrischanity]

[MEDIA=twitter]677261230340308998[/MEDIA]
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He just isn't every good at this.

Still can't do it. I try to put Hayden out of my mind and imagine a much better comedian telling such jokes, and these jokes would just be career enders for them.

These jokes are so bad, Carlos Mencia wouldn't steal them.

Pew pew.

They're starting to make progress! Here's Betsy Chen's proof of concept:

Spoiler

I can't wait for Cameron and Huey!

Edited to add:

Oh, here they are!

Spoiler: Huey and Cameron Proof of concept.

Uh oh...

Spoiler: I think we knew this was going to happen at some point.

 

[TheLateGreatBate]

"A legitimately funny joke just preceded this statement"?