Happy Krampusnacht - And Krampus is at your door.

  • 🇵🇦 Nuestro primer dominio localizado está en español en kiwifarms.pa. Our first localized domain is on Spanish on kiwifarms.pa.
  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account
Outer Party Member

Outer Party Member

6079 Smith W
kiwifarms.net
Registrado
29 de Nov, 2018
Today is Krampusnacht in Austria. On this festive occasion, children are visited by the half-goat, half-demon Krampus for a bit of fun. They are beaten and put in a bag, never to be seen again.
Gruss_vom_Krampus.jpg

This year, Krampus comes to your house, threatening to put you in his bag. He says you can plea your case, here and now, not to be taken away.

What do you say?
 
If I rat on all of the other kids I know who do worse, will you spare me?

Also, chances are even if the answer is 'no' I'll still rat on them all. If I am going to Hell, then I'm taking as many fucking people down with me as possible.
 
I tell him that he's a fake construct created by unenlightened sheep to scare their children into compliance, and that I don't believe in him or any other fake, meaningless god in this cold, uncaring universe, then fall asleep with a smug smile on my face like le edgy nihilistic atheist I am. But nah, I sell out all the other naughty kids in the hopes that he'll fuck off and leave me alone.
 
What if I leave HIM cookies and milk instead of Santa? I can always buy presents I want for myself. Using the milk and cookies to bribe Krampus seem better, and it's one less house Santa has to go to so he can get home earlier.
 
Say: "Come on in ya big galoot. I haven't seen you in years! How's the missus doing, she still pursuing that degree in botany?"

We then have a nice time catching up.
 
Krampus is St. Nicholas' bitch and no matter how much I fucked up in my youth, the old guy would always pull some strings so I would end up with sweets instead of in the furry's bag.
 
In my country, kids dress up as krampuses and beat the shit out of other kids with chains.

I think you Americans could use some of that.
 
I was always taught he was the Grinch's evil brother. Never realized he was a furfag construct
 
Tell him little kids is old news. He should keep up with the times and collect lolcows instead.
 
Debes iniciar sesión o registrarte para responder aquí.
Atrás
Top Abajo