Money Financhu Crisis / Chris sells his stuff megathread

[Subconcious Offense]

So much of the Chandlers staying afloat hinges on them basically becoming entirely different people in regards to spending.

Chris has both court and bronycon coming up, court fines could be paid off in installments, but its still a bill that absolutely must be paid or it goes to warrent. Bronycon is already running at a loss, he's out $250 for the ticket whether he stays home or not. Personally I think he'll move heaven and earth to get there and basically spend everything he has/will have on one weekend of pony bliss.

However bad things seem now, I think by August they're irreversibly fucked.

You underestimate the amount of people who will give Chris money. His brony trip was funded by other people in the first place.

 

[Mason Verger]

You underestimate the amount of people who will give Chris money. His brony trip was funded by other people in the first place.

Which he still managed to fuck up and spend. He had a hell of a windfall in April, and now he's eating spoonfuls of powdered milk.

 

[timtommy]

A cult would have to find and connect with Chris first. I don't know which, if any, operate in his neck of the woods or where they recruit. Otherwise it's possible - specifically after Barb passes - because Chris would eagerly accept what's ostensibly a welcoming social group if only he could find them, and pretending to be as much is how cults always snare their targets.

Mind you, I'm talking vis-a-vis cults that promise happiness and belonging, like Scientology. Some MLM scams have been described as cults (they promise money instead) and Chris has already been caught in one such scam (Cutco).

All kinds of ways Chris could find them. Look at the binaural beats bullshit he was into a while ago. AFAIK, he didn't buy anything from them, but if there was a culty thing attached to that, I could see him forking over a bunch of money for super secret beats to bring him sex or get rid of his penis.

In some ways, Chris is super susceptible to a cult. He is very gullible, willing to believe in all kinds of magical thinking, and always looking for a one stop shop to cure him of all of his problems.

On the other hand, he seems like a very low value target. He has no money, no prospects, and no discernible practical or social skills. Plus his notoriety means that associating with him may attract a lot of bullshit.

So I can't see anyone targeting him to get him involved with some magic beans cult, but given the number of magic beans stores on the internet, there is a decent chance Chris could stumble into one and blow a lot of money on beans.

Most enforced tard wranglers are just because various assholes have Christian moral bullshit that makes them want to control charity for tards, to make sure they don't wander off their moral path.

In theory, Chris should have a tard wrangler to keep him from spending his money on bullshit, but in reality, he isn't wasting it anywhere near as badly as drunks, drug addicts, and other idiots who blow all their welfare on shit like heroin.

In short, leave Chris alone. He's nowhere near as bad as most of these assholes.

There is a big difference between Chris paying for food, shelter and bills and then blowing the rest on stupid stuff and Chris spending so much money on stupid stuff that he can't afford essentials.

The former might annoy or amuse you, but it isn't going to set off any alarm bells that would lead to Chris being assigned someone to control his finances. The most that would happen out of it is some social worker trying to teach him concepts like budgeting and saving. It's the latter scenario that really could spiral.

 

[Muscle Bra]

He had a hell of a windfall in April, and now he's eating spoonfuls of powdered tard cum.

I'm totally loving the word filter on this one!

In some ways, Chris is super susceptible to a cult. He is very gullible, willing to believe in all kinds of magical thinking, and always looking for a one stop shop to cure him of all of his problems.

On the other hand, he seems like a very low value target. He has no money, no prospects, and no discernible practical or social skills. Plus his notoriety means that associating with him may attract a lot of bullshit.

I don't think cults care about the value of targets, as much as they care about how easy the pickings are. As you pointed out, Chris is gullible, has a great need for belonging/acceptance, wants to believe in magic, and is always looking for a quick and easy way out -- all of which fits perfectly into a cult's wheelhouse.

Even if CWC has very little money, I'm sure a cult would be more than happy to take whatever they could get from him and, once the revenue has dried up and he is of no more use to them, would have no problem in discarding him. It's kind of what cults do.

 

[Mason Verger]

I'm totally loving the word filter on this one!

Haha right? I ain't even mad at that one.
What's funny is, given that Chris has actually squirreled away his semen before, there probably actually IS powdered milk laying around the house.

 

[Issac Clark]

I wonder how much he would let his Gwenpool statue go for? Shame I don't really have anyway to contact him.

 

[Okkervils]

(Posted this in the random updates thread too. This probably would have been the preferable place to post it at all, but I am retarded. Fix if nessecary @The American Hedgehog, plz forgive.)

 

[The American Hedgehog]

In this batch of replies. Chris says he has standards for the videos he'll make and food he'll eat, and also puts a $1,000 price on his Twitter account.

 

[Okkervils]

In this batch of replies. Chris says he has standards for the videos he'll make and food he'll eat, and also puts a $1,000 price on his Twitter account.

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"No more school shooters."

What is he expecting from his followers? An edible fruit arrangement? Oh man...

 

[nvrwastetree]

In this batch of replies. Chris says he has standards for the videos he'll make and food he'll eat, and also puts a $1,000 price on his Twitter account.

Ver archivo adjunto 457190 Ver archivo adjunto 457191 Ver archivo adjunto 457192 Ver archivo adjunto 457193

Looks to me like the only person who doesn't like pizza here is Chris, who is lying because we all know that if a pizza was plopped down right in front of him, the damn thing would be finished in 5 minutes.

 

[Rogowski]

If you are desperate for an account with followers already built in then I guess I could see buying his Twitter. Not for a thousand dollars, but still. If you're trying to troll him by doing this that's dumb because you're probably gonna get doxxed by Chris and then Chris is just going to make a new Twitter that's not blocked by @Doopie and everyone else he's harassed so that's a win for him.

 

[Will you be my fwiend?]

Chris: "WE NEED FOOD WE'RE GONNA STARVE FOR REAL THIS TIME PAY US FOR FOOD NOWNOWNOW!!"
Also Chris: "Free pizza? Pshaw! Only the freshest of salads and steak can pass THESE lips!"
For a poor, food-scarce family, the Chandlers sure are selective in the charity they accept. Almost makes one wonder if they're really starving....

 

[Yop Yop]

So Chris is making 1300 a month + Patreon. Barb is making how much from her tugboat?
Let's say it's just 1300. The mortgage is 800.

That leaves Chris with $500 to pay his electricity, water, and Internet/cable bills, buy food for them both. Plus he has legal fees to pay. If they're surviving only on Chris' tardbux it sounds like they're gonna be scraping by really really close. But they'll survive. Of course I'm sure barb is getting some tardbux too tho.

 

[Pony Horn]

So Chris is making 1300 a month + Patreon. Barb is making how much from her tugboat?
Let's say it's just 1300. The mortgage is 800.

That leaves Chris with $500 to pay his electricity, water, and Internet/cable bills, buy food for them both. Plus he has legal fees to pay. If they're surviving only on Chris' tardbux it sounds like they're gonna be scraping by really really close. But they'll survive. Of course I'm sure barb is getting some tardbux too tho.

There's also his car insurance. Chris is paying the rates of a man who has hit a pedestrian. Gas. Credit cards. Loans. Property taxes. Other crap like Chris' Steam account.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

If you are desperate for an account with followers already built in then I guess I could see buying his Twitter. Not for a thousand dollars, but still. If you're trying to troll him by doing this that's dumb because you're probably gonna get doxxed by Chris and then Chris is just going to make a new Twitter that's not blocked by @Doopie and everyone else he's harassed so that's a win for him.

But even then, the account is already someone else. It's not like you could pretend it's you (or why would you want to?)

 

[Muscle Bra]

But even then, the account is already someone else. It's not like you could pretend it's you (or why would you want to?)

He just wants the infamous “CWCSonichu” tag and, since Chris seems willing to put a price tag on pretty much anything else in his life...

 

[AnOminous]

There is a big difference between Chris paying for food, shelter and bills and then blowing the rest on stupid stuff and Chris spending so much money on stupid stuff that he can't afford essentials.

People don't get tard wranglers because other people view their decisions as improvident. I think pretty much everyone agrees Chris is fucking dumb and doesn't make good decisions with money. However, he does do the bare minimum of usually actually paying his bills. Then, he stupidly blows the remainder on dumb shit. Every time, I don't care what @Marvin says. He's a goddamn idiot.

The result is that when anything unexpected happens, he suddenly has no money to deal with it and then the inevitable begging spree starts. And up until now, some goddamn moron always gives him the money. I also think he sometimes throws a begging spree even when he isn't actually desperately in need. He just realizes he's short on Lego bucks that month and begs for money. And Blarb has figured out her dimwit tard of a son can somehow magic up money when he wants to. I don't think she really understands how he does it, but he somehow does, so she leans on him, too.

This one seems real, though. I still think nobody should give this fat cocksucker any money, but maybe he actually needs it this time. Something's up.

 

[Marvin]

Then, he stupidly blows the remainder on dumb shit. Every time, I don't care what @Marvin says.

I don't follow.

Chris does pay his bills, but he never has any left over for emergencies. So everything that happens on a cycle longer than, say, 2 months will surprise him. Like property taxes.

 

[Gunslinger]

So do you think it's possible that Barb asks Chris for the mortgage money every month, but some months she keeps it to pay her bill collectors or buy shit, then the next month she claims their loan company is greedy and they need to make two payments? Or does Chris pay the mortgage company directly?

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

I don't follow.

Chris does pay his bills, but he never has any left over for emergencies. So everything that happens on a cycle longer than, say, 2 months will surprise him. Like property taxes.

He never has any left over for emergencies because he blows the extra (after bills) on legos