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which wave of feminism was the best wave?
Second wave feminism.
First wave feminism (late 1800s-early 1900s) merely aimed at womens suffrage (voting and right to own property). It was an important foundation to establish women as participants in human society, but it was not until second wave feminism did women begin to tug at their proverbial shackles.
Second wave feminism (60s) was the introduction of workplace rights, reproductive rights, legal inequalities, domestic abuse of women, social and legal issues with rape, the introduction of womens shelters and womens hospitals, etc. It was the movement that brought about the realization of females having different needs than men.
First and Second wave feminism by extension emphasized the needs of children in society and likewise, brought about childrens hospitals, promoted schools, children's need for playtime, end childhood hunger, etc.
Third wave feminism (90s) iirc was about individualism and sex expression. It encouraged homosexuality who were still in the closet at the time.
Fourth wave feminism is the one everyone hates because of gender equality and promotes the idea women as a marginalized social group. In a way, it retreads second wave feminism and for whatever reason has become coopted by male homosexuals and male-to-female transexuals.
To be honest, I do not consider the LGBT movement to be associated with feminism. While third wave feminism emboldened homosexuals who thought "hey wait, we want to be individuals too", their issues are not relevant to the issues of females and has no place in feminism. Homosexuals and transexuals merely step upon women's successes for their own gains and have set back women's rights as a result. Very often homosexuals and transexuals have a great resentment and hatred of women for achieving the social successes women have achieved and continue to push for.
I'd also like to point out that only first wave feminism ever fought for "equality". "Equity" has never been desired from feminism because women want to be treated as people and equity is patronizing towards those efforts. Equality is some situations is actually harmful for women because you end up with women in dangerous situations that requires the physical statures and muscle capacities of men.
A better idea of female inclusion in society is the identification of female skillsets, such as in detail work and social interactions. Men developed mathematics, women became "computers" to perform complex calculations en masse for scientific pursuits before machines. A man invented the first computer machine, a woman programmed the first compiler for code. Men developed medical technology, women introduced healthcare and nursing for round-the-clock medical attention. This is the healthier and more effective solution of men and women working together for the betterment and advancement of humanity.