Fanfiction Horrors

[Pointless Pedant]

Perhaps there's a Chinese Kiwi Farms that has a thread on those as well...

Probably.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

I fucking hate the harem genre, nothing good ever comes out of it. I hate it even more in fan fiction because of how uninspired they are. Too bad it's becoming more and more popular in the Pokémon fandom with Ash/Harem fics. This one, titled "The Chosen One's Ascension", I think sticks out of them all because it was written in response to when Ash lost in the Kalos League.

Even before it gets to the harem, it's still shit--partly because the formatting for the entire thing is godawful and makes your eyes bleed, partly because this person just sucks as a writer. And yes, the smut is terribly-written and almost hilarious at how nearly similar they are with each other (the author went out of their way to make Ash and Serena 17 by the way, I don't know about the other girls). If this fic was a parody, it'd be glorious, but it's sadly not.

Spoiler: Good luck trying to read this.

The planned harem:

Spoiler: First lemon scene of the story if you want to know what it's like

 

[A Random]

"Serena, Mistress of the Dark" sounds like a shitty porno.

 

[GrandTheftAutism]

Sweet Apple Massacre. Nuff said

The fact that this thread has gone on for 31 pages without mentioning Cupcakes is an indictment of the people who have posted in it thus far. Cupcakes is the gold standard for MLP badfic.

One particular Harry Potter badfic that sticks in my mind is Tainted Perfection (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3178475/1/Tainted-Perfection), a fic most notable for describing Harry getting a hard-on with the phrase "Harry's cow popped out of the barn door and mooed dangerously".

 

[Chris did nothing wrong]

I was trying to see what movies you wouldn't expect a person to write a sincere fanfiction about had fanfics. Was not disappointed. The most fucked up thing is that half of these are romances.

Three Men and a Baby:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11758254/1/The-Minute-I-Saw-You

Kangaroo Jack:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11697655/1/Danger-Down-Under

I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11886541/1/Art-Imitates-Life

The Shaggy Dog:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9303237/1/Hungry

Cop And A Half:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10018817/1/Pint-Sized-Cop-Kid

Wild Hogs:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6258637/1/The-Road-Taken

Barbershop:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12297889/1/The-Un-Thinkable-L-Impensable

Dodgeball:
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10081705/1/Passing-Strange

 

[Cato]

All the MLP crossovers at fanfiction.net for your enjoyment. (99% sure you don't need an account just to browse.) Everything from Halo to Arthur to Lord of the Rings. I'm reasonably confident this is ground zero as to why the future belongs to the Chinese.

What is it with fanfiction autists and Sonic? For some reason Sonic had by far the most MLP crossovers of any series there.

 

[A Random]

There's a horse who is their Sonic. For a while people did comparison videos. Maybe it's that.

 

[friedshrimp]

http://matthewjabeznazarioa.deviantart.com/art/Opening-of-Spongy-and-The-Starbeast-675371322

 

[Meowthkip]

Perhaps there's a Chinese Kiwi Farms that has a thread on those as well...

We need to form an alliance with Chinese Kiwi Farms.

 

[Pointless Pedant]

What is it with fanfiction autists and Sonic? For some reason Sonic had by far the most MLP crossovers of any series there.

I think Sonic attracts autists because he's fast and they're slow. They don't want to be "slow-in-the-mind", they want to go forth and zap to the extreme. The gameplay of Sonic games is also very simple, which lets them play and win easily.

There was an exceptional individual in the year above me at school who was obsessed with Sonic.

 

[DatBepisTho]

I don't know if it still exists, but there was a Prometheus fic where our heroine fucks (literally) with David's disembodied head.

It was like only one of two at the time I forced myself to read it.

 

[Meowthkip]

I don't know if it still exists, but there was a Prometheus fic where our heroine fucks (literally) with David's disembodied head.

It was like only one of two at the time I forced myself to read it.

Links plz, sounds hot.

 

[DatBepisTho]

Links plz, sounds hot.

If you say so. (I think it was awkwardly written. Kind of like a Harlequin romance in space. Minus the abs and everything lol)
I'll try to find it!

Edit: No luck on that sauce. It was like two pages long and had no title at the time I read it back in 2012, but I checked fanfiction.net for it and nothing. Nothing in the Prometheus tag seems to fit the bill there save for this and there's no headfucking nor are they stranded. (But it is a short David dindu nuffin fic, enjoy.)
Which is weird, Prometheus has such a small fandom and is very niche-y, you'd think it'd turn up after a three-phase search.
Maybe the author got better and hid their shame?

 

[Kari Kamiya]

^ Is this the fic?

Crossing the Endless Desert

 

[Chocolate Elvis]

Scooby Doo: Wrestlemania Mystery was a mistake.

Spoiler: Truth is stranger than (fan)fiction

 

[Meowthkip]

Scooby Doo: Wrestlemania Mystery was a mistake.

Spoiler: Truth is stranger than (fan)fiction

I wish I knew more about wrestling so I could properly appreciate these stories, because wow.

Just wow.

 

[DatBepisTho]

^ Is this the fic?

Crossing the Endless Desert

Ye. That's it, I think. Apparently I was looking on the wrong site.

 

[FlipTopBox]

Did you know that Chuck E Cheese has a fandom? Did you know that they make fanfiction?
http://w11.zetaboards.com/Retro_Pizza_Zone/forum/4181468/

 

[A Random]

Scooby Doo: Wrestlemania Mystery was a mistake.

Spoiler: Truth is stranger than (fan)fiction

When I was like 12, there were these guys who did fanfiction of stuff like Big Brother or The Mole, but having fictional characters, which eventually led to fanfiction of their fanfiction being written by them. And then one of them wrote some kind of wrestling league for animu characters.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Did you know that Chuck E Cheese has a fandom? Did you know that they make fanfiction?
http://w11.zetaboards.com/Retro_Pizza_Zone/forum/4181468/

This was probably the only time where I didn't want to bother looking for smut to laugh at, except even this forum doesn't want smut or anything over the G-rating on it (despite having to be at least 16 well, 13, but it says 16 for some reason to sign up). I'm not sure if I should be relieved by this.