Elon Musk's NeuraLink reveals 'N1', first generation brain interface system on a chip

TLDR:

-1000x higher neural reading resolution than existing technologies
-Each chip is tiny, comes with 1024 attached micro-electrodes that can read individual neurons and write to clusters of neurons. Each chip handles all signals processing and features wireless connection (Bluetooth).
-Electrode sensors are implanted beside/between neurons, so each electrode can read multiple neurons, but writing (inciting action potentials) to neurons is less precise.
-Electrodes are super thin, only a robot can implant them through tiny hole in skull. It weaves them safely past blood vessels and takes an hour to implant one chip. Implantation would resemble laser eye surgery.
-Consumer setup includes Array of 4 chips, which are then hooked up to a small battery compartment behind ear, which has a usb-c port for firmware updates.
-Implanted Array comes with a phone app.
-First use cases utilizing cluster of 4 chips include phone control, mouse and keyboard control.


Applications are limited by implantation region. For example implanting all micro-electrodes into the motor cortex leads to emulating and stimulating movement. Technology scales in both directions (improvements in resolution/smaller size of electrodes, computational capacity of the chips, higher wireless bandwidths) leading to improvements all around. i.e Existing implants could be upgraded via software or an external hardware add on.

It's finally fucking happening you guys.

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Elon had me at USB-C. I'll take two please, willing to travel to a shithole country to get them implanted.

Implantation of these could easily be funded with advertisements - behold the brave future, where people walking on the street suddenly get a glazed faraway look and then perform a perfectly coreographed sing and dance number praising Coca-Cola?
 
I thought google glass was inconvenient and stupid. But sure, I guess bandsawing the top of your head off for a brain chip is cool
 
This type of technology will be commonplace in 20-30 years, but I'll let some brave fools be the beta testers and help them figure out the bugs before you literally get surgery to put computer parts in your brain.
 
Just wait until 3 years from now, when N1 support is dropped, and some corporate shill berates you for not wanting to install the next hardware upgrade.
 
I drew the line at cybernetic bodymods when I heard you can have your pacemaker hacked these days. You think we're headed for some kind of strange future where all the techster cunts end up with this crap in their heads and Gen ZZZ can just hack into and mind control these people like literal robots?

Actually on second thought, yeah, give me this future. Please give me this future where I can pay a Ukranian hacker to reprogram my boss to give me a raise or leave me alone at work. Please give me this future where if I have a friend with an annoying habit I can just pirate an app that lets me jack into their head and make them stop dressing like an idiot, or I can use said app to make people shut the fuck up about what they had for dinner or Trump/AOC said this or that.

Make this happen Elon, you fucking Ambien Mickey Finn drinking schiziophrenic shill. Do it you bitch, do it. Give me a future where I'm the ubermensch just because I can download an app people are too stupid to know about. I am so fucking ready for this future.
 
Oh, almost let my horror at the idea of brain implants blind me to the more likely scenario: This is total fucking bullshit and nothing close to what is described exists.
It’s likely just severely over-hyped by the media. I’d be impressed if it can do more than deliver some basic electric impulses from your brain on the “read” side (e.g. turning on a lightbulb), and maybe cause some phantom flashes/sounds on the “write” side.
 
But imagine the possibilities. You could pay for implanted memories of holidays and vacations. Every weekend you could go on a 30 days cruise.
But you didn't actually go. There's a big difference between remembering something that happened versus actively experiencing it in real time. Why bother with implanted memories when you can just vacation in your dream-state while you sleep?
 
You joke, but so much of his manifesto seems more reasonable the further we get into the internet age.

Chumps write manifestos and plant nail bombs. Real men get dummy implants and skate through life by literally hacking the brains of those around them. I can think of so many ways this technology could be exploited by hackers that I am unironically fucking hopeful for the future now. The same way I haven't paid a dime for hundreds of movies and hours upon hours of music could be applied to social interaction altogether. Sign me the fuck up. This is the best fucking future ever.

Project is due today? Nah, that's been delayed. Oh, that raise was going to someone else? Yeah, I could have sworn that was mine. I'm in violation of the dress code? Yeah, I knew you were just being paranoid. You've seen me buy booze here too many times? Yeah, I knew I just looked like some other guy. I get that alot. I'm an asshole? Yeah, I knew you were thinking of someone else. I bet its that Todd guy. Fuck him, he doesn't deserve a raise. What seems to be the problem officer? Thanks for the warning sir, I'll make sure it doesn't happen again. You were thinking we should see other people? Yeah, I knew I was the only one you wanted.
 
You have nothing to worry about considering the last supposed innovation from Elon Musk ending up being an underground tunnel you drive your tesla through. It didn't work because he couldn't even pour the concrete correctly. Also his cars spontaneously combust and he's a gross melty wax face looking retard.
 
so i'm skimming through this long ass presentation, do they ever actually show the tech? i kept waiting for a "okay, and here's timmy who just got his brain implant, he's gonna check facebook with his brain"

you can show me a hundred neurosurgeons and a thousand infographics, but if i don't see the fucking product, i'm going to assume you're full of shit.
 
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