Dopest Verses in Rap History - ~rollin’ up a stanky, i got dookie on my finger~

[Snusmumriken]

Kids say the darndest things. Rappers say even darnder things. Drop the sickest bars you’ve ever heard, ironic or unironic. Mine are a mix of both:


“I will light your fart on fire with my rounds.”

“I have four-hundred cars. I have four-hundred scars, and four-hundred guitars.”

—Krispy Kreme (FroggyFresh), The Baddest


“A virgin? Honey needed a slap / She tried to tell me she’s a virgin with her yea-wide gap.”

—Slick Rick, Mona Lisa


“It’s fun for me to grab a boob. Plus, my peenus got an attitude.”

—Eminem, Kick Off (Freestyle)


“I will punch a baby bear in his shit.”

—DJ Shadow ft. Run the Jewels, Nobody Speak


“Now it’s time for you to die very rough!”

—MarioJudah, Die Very Rough


“I made you work ‘til your butt got sore / In other words, I’m about to get raw.”

—Vanilla Ice, Ice Cold


“Well, let me tell you something: you might got more cash than me / But you ain’t got the skills to eat a nigga ass like me.”

—Canibus, Second Round K.O.


“I can double my density from 360 degrees to 720 instantly.”

—Canibus, Funk Master Flex Freestyle


“ICE CREAM! SCOOPIN’! SHITTIN’! POOPIN’!”

—Toosii ft. Fivio Foreign, spin music


“I pray for this bitches, I pray for these niggers / Before I spin the block, I ask God to bless my trigger.”

—LongBeachGriffy (not an official song but I had to include it here)


(I kindly ask ye all to post a link or credit the artist/song so we can watch it for ourselves thank you)

 

[Idiotron]

 

[Whatevermancer]

"Responsibility's cool, but there's more things in life, Like getting your dick rode all fucking night."
Death Grips - I want it, I need it.

 

[the rat]

"Wobbity Wobbity" -The Prodigal Stunna (2014)

 

[A Cardboard Box]

“I will punch a baby bear in his shit.”

—DJ Shadow ft. Run the Jewels, Nobody Speak

I came here to post "I'm a bag of dicks, put me to your lips." Or
I will walk into a court while erect, screaming "Yes! I am guilty motherfuckers, I am death."

I'm tickled to death someone else appreciates this song. Tbh every line from it is a fucking banger.

 

[DumbDude43]

"smoke weed everyday!"
- snoop dre featuring dr. dogg

 

[Local Farmer]

“NIGGA HAIL HITLER,
ALL MY NIGGAS NAZI’S
NIGGA HAIL HITLER”

-Kanye West

 

[oldTireWater]

"I'm far from hard, emotionally scarred
On Pico Boulevard, I was regarded as a retard
I make myself sick, get on my own nerve
Immature, insecure, grown-up nerd"

- Fat Lip

​

 

[OrionBalls]

The entirety of "Love is Blind" by EVE. Especially the third verse.

 

[The Wise Shaman]

"Somebody, stop me, I'm smoking the track
I'll Giggity Lois and make more Sons of the Masks
I'll Jim Carrey your ass out of the door, you bitch
'Cause I'm the best green guy he's played since The Grinch"

— The Mask

 

[beautiful person]

"She got a light-skinned friend look like Michael Jackson
Got a dark-skinned friend look like Michael Jackson"

- Kanye West, Slow Jamz

 

[Brenda Holiday]

I broke up with my ex girl
Here's her number
Sike! That's the wrong number!

 

[Calvin Gabriel]

 

[Rainbow Child]

I two-step with Lucifer, and ever since I started dancin'
I've walked a fine line between Einstein and Charles Manson
Starvin' in this famine with my stomach growlin'
Like someone shoutin' an hundred thousand times louder than thunder poundin'
Fuck around and I'll punch your mouth in
I'm the king of the mountain, with my life in this project like it's public housin'
Countin' on the fact I firebomb entire songs
And wont stop until the world's in my palm like Viacom
Diabolic: I'll supply the higher wattage via fibre optic wire
Until you acquire come kind'a knowledge
'Coz life made me grow wiser than old-timers
Hot-headed like the Ghostrider behind a slow driver
Sole survivor: flowin' lava's second nature
So don't test, it's best to save your breath like respirators
I'll throw a punch at your ribs that gives your lungs asthma
And has you pourin' out your guts faster than Dutch Masters
Drunk Bastard: past the point of no return
Like Denzel trickin' Ethan Hawke into smokin' sherm
Judgement overturned: holdin' court like Mordecai
Immortalise when I make statues bleed and portraits cry
I'll go to war for mine: rebel army guard the border
I'm in the trenches barkin' orders like I'm Sgt Slaughter
Pray to Jesus H for mercy and plead your case
'Coz on the frontlines, you're dead the second that you see my face

-Diabolic, "The Frontlines" (featuring Immortal Technique, and his bars are also dope, so check it out)

 

[Stephanides]

 

[𝕺𝖑' 𝕯𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖞 𝕱𝖆𝖙𝖘𝖔]

GOT MORE CHEESE THAN DORITOS CHEETOS OR FRITOS

 

[Womble of Wimbledon]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=4k5n_r81u6M

Genuinely impressive but I must admit it reminds me of this...

 

[Soup Sammiches]

This. The whole song.

 

[ShahOfIran1979]

"Somebody, stop me, I'm smoking the track
I'll Giggity Lois and make more Sons of the Masks
I'll Jim Carrey your ass out of the door, you bitch
'Cause I'm the best green guy he's played since The Grinch"

— The Mask

Going prime on the beat, hearing you three was torture
I'll giggity Lois and make some more orders
-Jeff Bezos

 

[Apu Wrangler]

I two-step with Lucifer, and ever since I started dancin'
I've walked a fine line between Einstein and Charles Manson
Starvin' in this famine with my stomach growlin'
Like someone shoutin' an hundred thousand times louder than thunder poundin'
Fuck around and I'll punch your mouth in
I'm the king of the mountain, with my life in this project like it's public housin'
Countin' on the fact I firebomb entire songs
And wont stop until the world's in my palm like Viacom
Diabolic: I'll supply the higher wattage via fibre optic wire
Until you acquire come kind'a knowledge
'Coz life made me grow wiser than old-timers
Hot-headed like the Ghostrider behind a slow driver
Sole survivor: flowin' lava's second nature
So don't test, it's best to save your breath like respirators
I'll throw a punch at your ribs that gives your lungs asthma
And has you pourin' out your guts faster than Dutch Masters
Drunk Bastard: past the point of no return
Like Denzel trickin' Ethan Hawke into smokin' sherm
Judgement overturned: held in court like Mordecai
Immortalise when I make statues bleed and portraits cry
I'll go to war for mine: rebel army guard the border
I'm in the trenches barkin' orders like I'm Sgt Slaughter
Pray to Jesus H for mercy and plead your case
'Coz on the frontlines, you're dead the second that you see my face

-Diabolic, "The Frontlines" (featuring Immortal Technique, and his bars are also dope, so check it out)

Diabolic's verse on the DWTD hidden track slaps too

Go 'head and grip Glocks, I'll snap your trigger finger in six spots
You'll have to lip lock with hypodermic needles to lick shots
I'll watch you topple flat, put away your rings and holla back
Can't freestyle; you're screwed off the top, like bottle caps
Beneath the surface, I'm overheatin' your receiver circuits
By unleashin' deeper verses than priests speak in churches
What you preach is worthless, your worship defeat the purpose
Like President Bush takin' bullets for the secret service
Beyond what y'all fathom, I shit on cats and jaw tap 'em
Show no compassion, like havin' a straight-faced orgasm
Tour jack 'em, have his half-a-10 bitch suck my friend's dick
In the meantime, you can French-kiss this clenched fist
Diabolic—a one-man brigade spreading cancer plague
Fist-fuckin' a pussy's face, holdin' a hand grenade
So, if I catch you bluffin', faggot, you're less than nothin'
I just had to get that stress off my chest like breast reduction