DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Corpun]

If this were anyone else I would feel bad that their life has come to being drunk and miserable at 2AM in the morning, but this is DSP and everything that has ever happened to him is his fault. He only has himself to blame for his irrelevance, lack of savings, and his late night cope seshs where he wallows in misery. I don't have an ounce of sympathy for him.

 

[grump]

I've been going back to DSP's ancient videos, from the "camera recording his TV so everything's blue" days. He was so much more lively back then, some of his dumb jokes actually make me chuckle too. A far cry from the perpetually tired old man we see now.

Phill was a hard cry and a six pack cracking throughout the phone call from sounding like he's calling his ex to get back together or call an ex before he kills himself, if it was anyone else to anyone else I'd be like man bro needs crisis help

Phils the prime age for a legit midlife crisis. Once men get into their forties is when they begin to really take stock of their situation. And while phil's delusional the sheer weight of his situation seems to have really hit in these past couple of days. This was a cry for help to the closest thing he has to a confidant and peer.

Legit question:

Khet obviously wears the trousers in the relationship. She eats his cookies for DSP tries it, comes to his office to stop his drunk call with Wings. I believe what she said was "You've gotta tell me when you're gonna do these things". He got afraid immediately with his "Sorry baby", etc.

There's some inconsistency/ mystery: Women are usually very diligent about household budgets. Given that she wears the trousers, why is she not going nuclear on him regarding the Champions spending? The most likely spending is roughly 200k, right? Does she close her eyes on this?

When the combined IQ of the household is less than the fucking cat, it's not hard to imagine. You have to remember that Khat was so far gone that her family literally tried to exorcise her (and Jenna). She might be as intelligent as a normal person - although I seriously doubt it - but she is certainly almost as stupid as Phil is given her hectic past and traumas.
She doesn't care, and more importantly doesn't have the capacity to care at the moment, and while things certainly can change it is unlikely.

They're not even in a domineering wife/submissive husband relationship. They're not even in a sugar baby/sugar daddy relationship.

They're in what can best be described as apathetic findom. Phil is the guy that provides the housing and funnels money to her from his paypigs. She is there to be a beard and a 'IM MARRIED ST00PID' Machore adolt trophy for however much thats still worth these days. Frankly I don't think even the most far gone of his dents are impressed anymore. Thats it. They go off and do their own things all day.

His duty is to keep the roof over her head and the door dash and money flowing. She owes him nothing other than to maintain her name on the marriage certificate and maybe get roped into a once in a blue moon cameo to remind people she still exists. She doesn't care what he gets up to because again they're not in anymore of a relationship beyond what you'd have with your tax attorney. Her main daily duty is to herself, working a job to give herself additional spending money beyond what phil gives her as an allowance. Oh and she gets to kick phil around as the alpha in the house for fun.

 

[Zyklon C]

Phils the prime age for a legit midlife crisis. Once men get into their forties is when they begin to really take stock of their situation. And while phil's delusional the sheer weight of his situation seems to have really hit in these past couple of days. This was a cry for help to the closest thing he has to a confidant and peer.

That presumes a level of self-awareness that I would submit Phail hasn't demonstrated enough to suggest it actually exists.

I think the phone call was merely a drunken flailing out to find someone he could punch down on.

 

[The Punished Mitch]

I love having audio confirmation of DSP being a castrated, high estrogen high cortisol cuckold to his fat findom. Truly a subhuman existence.

 

[Hamburger Detractor]

imagine being so low that even Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu, the Goddess Blue Heart, and our lord and god ghosts you.

"You call your wife mom and don't fuck her. I fucked my own mother. We are not the same." - Chris to Phil, probably.

 

[PigSeed]

I'VE BEEN SICK SINCE WEDNESDAY AND JUST SAW THE TEVIN THUMBNAIL I HAVE SO MANY PAGES TO READ TO CATCH UP BUT FUCKING LMAOOOOOOOOOOO

 

[DerichLovesSSI]

After a massive explosion takes out Renton a new microuniverse will be born. In the light a voice can be heard "WELCOME…?……HOME”

Fixed

 

[Optimus Crime]

I love having audio confirmation of DSP being a castrated, high estrogen high cortisol cuckold to his fat findom. Truly a subhuman existence.

He's unfortunately much more "there" while drunk. I don't know how to put it but he was more articulate, less piggish, but still, very, very much narcissistic. Plus his nasally voice being unfiltered... Yeah, this fuck is gay!

But he always had potential, which makes his current situation that much more hilarious seeing how it's his retarded dents keeping him away from the pressure that could reform him by donating hundreds a day when he really needs to get fucked up and decide to rebuild himself (the 6 Million tip man)

A true victim of his own sussess

 

[PigSeed]

Watching around 9:00 in the stream. Its rich seeing Wings compare himself to Burnt Peanut. I'm not much into streaming culture, but any time I've seen a Burnt Peanut stream he's high energy and looks like he's having a good time. He's obviously talented as a streamer. That's why he has a following. Its not because he is supremely talented at video games at an elite level.

Without wading into your other examples (that also happen to fit this description, but I'm not tryna sperg) the  actual reason Burnt Peanut is successful and has a following is because he's a very useful idiot, who is both happy to go along with a grift without sabotaging it for some stupid reason, AND smart enough to understand his position. BP is the most obviously botted, industry plant streamer since that little white boy faggy astronaut streamer that never took off. That said, I'm really not arguing against your ultimate thesis because BP still has the success he does because he's an enthusiastic instrument. He'll play dumb about his platform, say what pays the bills, not bite the hand that feeds, etc. When DSPolitics began, people thought "oh, Phil will become a right-wing grifter and that'll be his new hustle!" without appreciating that doing that successfully actually DOES require a bit of research and footwork to stay up to date on whatever the current outrage cycle is. Phil flamed out almost immediately on that front because he couldn't be fucked to invest in either side of the culture war enough to proselytize properly, and just fence-sat on every issue.

All that was to say that no, Wings COULDN'T have been BP, and neither could Phil, but not for the stated reasons.

“HE’S !”
“SHE’S !”
“THEY’RE BOTH !!!!!”

I'm still too uncultured to know wtf this meme refers to, it seemingly developed while I had briefly escaped the snortex

Presented without comment:

Something unexpected happened I'm in bed with muh wife February 13 2026.mp4

- Joseph, son of Jacob, describing a miracle

Idk the incident might be less embarrassing than this... everyone rubs one out, but this pathetic drunk coping with the fat guy that doesn't want to be your friend is just cringe.

In hindsight, it's only embarrassing because of the technical error. When you think about it, what he was "caught" doing is only "embarrassing" in the sense of like... him possibly not having a cleanup plan, and us seeing his BURST emote. Somebody today with the charisma of like Fuentes, Hasan, honestly even fucking Vaush would be able to tank that moment and eventually memeify it.

We're talking about an ecosystem where proud Nazis and proud Communists can proudly virtue signal to their fanbase of fellow pedos and talk about how they jerk off to lolis or horses or whatever the fuck, and make $10,000 a month on Patreon. DSP accidentally streaming himself doing what MOST ADULT MEN do at least once a month? Really not that big a deal.

What IS truly depressing and existentially horrifying is that the Burst was arguably the high point of embarrassment for him. That moment of severe cringe and unthinkable shame was essentially his Olympus, and everything after that point has been a further, sadder valley.

Looking spectacular, your highness
Ver archivo adjunto 8558433

 

[Ivan Daniloff]

But he always had potential which makes his current situation that much more hilarious seeing how it's his retarded dents keeping him away from the pressure that could reform him by donating hundreds a day

Phil had potential? Phil could reform? I’m not sure I agree. He’s stupid, repellent physically and interpersonally, bad at games, and has no skills except yapping and begging. What would reform look like for him?

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

Phil has sent money to Wings in the past, and I don't even think this is the first time he's superchatted a 50 before. He's really weird with money, dents like Duncan get fuck all for all their work but somehow Wings and Kino get his support no problem

It's not weird, they make more money (or at least more money per hour wasted) and Phil is trying to leech off them. Same for that Early Bird who gets lots of views. If you're beneath what Phil considers himself as an internet celebrity, you're dogshit to him. It's why his last actual somewhat streaming friend Brian had to be disposed.

 

[Optimus Crime]

Phil had potential? Phil could reform? I’m not sure I agree. He’s stupid, repellent physically and interpersonally, bad at games, and has no skills except yapping and begging. What would reform look like for him?

Not gay

 

[grump]

That presumes a level of self-awareness that I would submit Phail hasn't demonstrated enough to suggest it actually exists.

I think the phone call was merely a drunken flailing out to find someone he could punch down on.

Not saying he fully understands it and like mentioned before even when reaching for a connection with wings it manifests in his typical manipulative way of making it all about himself. But deep down the isolation and lifestyle has started to wear on him...well no scratch that, its always been wearing on him, but its entered into a new stage of wear. Before a few year ago the snortfort was locked up much tighter than now. He didn't interact with any other personality, he refused all interviews etc. But he's slowly been lowering the barriers since. Of course this has caused its fair share of drama but hes continued to the point where interactions with the wider world that were previously unheard of are now becoming somewhat routine and he's now drunk dialing on the air.

he is on some level seeking out a connection even though he is incapable of forming one.

 

[Burn In Hell Burnell]

Phil had potential? Phil could reform? I’m not sure I agree. He’s stupid, repellent physically and interpersonally, bad at games, and has no skills except yapping and begging. What would reform look like for him?

The only way Phil could reform is to leave the internet, completely. The internet is the root of all his problems and I don't mean the trolling either. The internet enables and indulges all of his worst impulses and personality traits. Ever since the earliest documented times of him being extremely online way back in the late 90s/early 2000s, we have seen the roots of what he is today, and it's clear nearly 30 goddamn years later that as long as he's online, he will not be able to resist being Phil Burnell the unlikable prick in some way or another.

I would be fascinated to see what he might be like if he truly, completely detached and detoxed from the internet for a year, let alone permanently. The core of him would still remain, of course, but still. It would be his one and only hope. Like many lolcows, as it happens.

 

[neger psykolog]

If this were anyone else I would feel bad that their life has come to being drunk and miserable at 2AM in the morning, but this is DSP and everything that has ever happened to him is his fault. He only has himself to blame for his irrelevance, lack of savings, and his late night cope seshs where he wallows in misery. I don't have an ounce of sympathy for him.

It says something that literally no one seems to feel bad for him and proactively think this is fucking hilarious (which it is)

Welcome.... home Phil Burnell. You've reached the penultimate stage where everyone openly aylawgs you and seal claps every misfortune that befalls you.

Enjoy gout.

edit: there are so many other people in the world who are deserving of sympathy, Phil doesn't deserve any. He's a genuine original piece of shit.

 

[Huggler]

And you know Wings was the second choice since LTG didn't answer.

if only wings had no bitch in his blood like he says and shits on dsp for his backhanded insults, phil could do the snakening 3.0

 

[RougeRed]

Something about the drunk call had been kinda nagging me and I'm starting to think I'm on to something. The way Phil talks to Kat like a child is weird, and initially I assumed it was just another of his skinwalker idiosyncrasies. Usually he does that when he's trying to play soft with the actual retarded dents who watch him play kid's games, but he does varying degrees of it at other times. I think it's his attempt at a "trying not to upset delicate people" voice.

It got me thinking, "Why does he feel the need to do that for Kat?". Whether he was right next to her in bed (the story from the call itself) or she came to his office (the later story), he was being VERY quiet, and her accusation that he was being so loud that he woke her up just doesn't make sense. I don't think he woke her up, I think she realized he was talking to someone that wasn't his stream and took issue with it. I think what we heard during the call when she was there was fear. She was abused horribly as a child, and abuse victims becoming abusers is pretty common. A lot of things he's done and said seem illogical, but make perfect sense if you entertain the possibility that he lives in fear of upsetting her even slightly. Not sure I'd call it a powerlevel, and I wish that I didn't recognize this from experience, but it's eerily similar to a number of abusive spouse cases I've seen.

All of this could just be part of his delusional bullshit, but I really feel like I'm onto something. I'm just gonna start listing some. No idea how many I'll do.

His refusal to allow anything even remotely heterosexual. I still think he's closeted, but maybe men are the only thing he feels safe making sex jokes about.
The time he hot-micced trying to tell Kat he spilled water on himself only for her immediate response to be something like "I don't fucking care. Go finish your stream."
The mandated "spend time with my wife" would make sense as a demand from a psycho abuser. He just sits there in silence watching her play Skyrim again.
The stream she was on, he seemed afraid to even look at or touch her.
He was always a bully and a narcissist, but he's gotten significantly worse over the years. His thirst to abuse people and feel superior makes sense if he feels like he is always on the defensive at home.
Severe alcoholism to cope with 24/7 anxiety of basically being a rat in a cage with a snake that could pounce on you at any moment.
Staying up crazy late because when she is asleep is the only time he gets any peace.
Never leaving the house because she freaks out if he does anything without her. Abusers are threatened by any possibility that the victim is able to have anything that they aren't able to be involved in.
The years of hiding and lying about WWEC. He supposedly promised Kat he wouldn't play mobile games anymore, and her finding out he not only broke this promise, but dumped a house-worth of money into it would have been a nuclear-level event.
His constant self-affrimation crap about how happy he is with his marriage and his life.
All of the days where he shows up on stream looking like a beat dog along with the occasional "behind the scenes stuff he can't talk about".
Blatant lies to make her look better. He told Wings that she isn't fat anymore. That is nearly physically impossible given how overweight she was when we saw her, and how long ago it was.
Her fucking up really simple cooking stuff makes a lot of sense if she resents having to do it. Any time he asks her to make something more complicated than a frozen meal, she fucks it up so he stops asking, and now he just doordashes everything.
I think she really did take bites out of all of those cookies before he got them on stream. He sounded pissed off about it for just a moment and seemed genuinely surprised. He then immediately caught himself and said something like "And that's fine" in that same sing-song voice he uses for her. The immediate reaction to stifle his anger and placate her suggests that he does this a lot. It might seem like something that isn't a big deal, but it is. If you order food and your spouse think it's okay to take bites out of a bunch of stuff without asking or even telling you, that's a really bad sign that they do not treat you with the respect that partners should share.
His claim that adults with families don't have time for friends. It's probably just cope, but if Kat is taking up that much of his time and energy, he might think that is just a normal amount of effort to maintain a single relationship, and that every married person is in the same situation.

I'm sure I could go on, but this has already been a bit exhausting. Phil is already an extremely pitiful person, and while he brought it on himself, it doesn't make his story less miserable. Being right about this would mean it's so much worse than I thought, and I genuinely hope I'm wrong.

 

[DerelictOnion]

I say it all the time, watching old Phil content I can see the façade of entertainment. It’s still content for wheelchairs and children, but I can see how someone very dumb (so most of the population) would find it entertaining.

Now? The begging is the entertainment. The whining and the crying is the content. The closest he comes to being entertaining is clown mode, which could work for the wheelchairs but he can’t even maintain that. Plus he looks so ghoulish now. He was never fun to look at but he looks 90 and acts like a bad tempered 10 year old.

Old-style DSP was very similar to those Youtubers who just do stupid shit in games and are raking in millions of subs. He had this magical pig touch where he'd screw up in inconceivable ways. The old TIHYDPs were and still are pretty hilarious. Now, imagine in a different reality DSP reaching out to those creators and striking a deal - for him to provide the content and for them to do the editing. I can see him easily keeping his channel fresh by cutting out the bloat while substantially increasing his views on single videos. Plenty of other benefits too, like playing the games when he feels like it and not focusing on chat for 90% of the time. Also, no begging for pennies = way less stress on the daily.

Of course, for this to work he'd need good planning, foresight, financial discipline, the ability to not take himself too seriously and to not screw over others constantly.......yeah, the complete opposite of DSP, so it would never have worked anyway.

 

[Eekum Bokum]

"You call your wife mom and don't fuck her. I fucked my own mother. We are not the same." - Chris to Phil, probably.

That would be a great Epic Rap Battles of History video, Chris-chan VS DSP.

 

[woc_krava]

Watching Kino Casino go over the call and holy shit this segment is rough and they didn't even get to the phone call yet. PPP bluntly laying out the hell that is Kat's daily life gave me second hand anxiety and now they're predicting Bankruptcy 2 Electric Boogaloo.

I haven't watched it yet and people here are saying that Khet isn't innocent victim, which is true.

However: Pandalee, who was no angel herself, started getting panic attacks from living with Phil.

I think that's one of the best parts of The Dented Zone, it shows you what living with Phil would be like.