Can we pitch some terrible kiwifarms merch ideas?

[SandyCat]

Lolcow tourist attraction ideas are also acceptable

I vote for a ethan ralph gunt mousepad with the gunt serving as the raised handrest

 

[MoffAlbert]

Gold commemorative coins

 

[Breadbassket]

Lolcow body pillows.

 

[Red Hood]

Lolcow/Love Quest themed valentines

 

[Exigent Circumcisions]

XXXXXL tard helmets

 

[JULAY]

Official Kiwi Farms stinkditch dilators.

 

[SiccDicc]

A poster of the various feet pics of Kiwis in the shape of Null's face.

 

[Shidoen]

Kiwi Farm cock rings with your user handle engraved with the optional diamond sonichu encrusted.

 

[I am vomit]

Light up butt plugs that blast the kiwi logo on the ground like the bat symbol in the sky.

 

[Shidoen]

Light up butt plugs that blast the kiwi logo on the ground like the bat symbol in the sky.

Null has the stockpile but refuses to share.

 

[Colon capital V]

Super Duper Extra X-clusive (Pay per View) threads of Null's feet

 

[CivilianOfTheFandomWars]

Kiwifarms brand condoms.
It's a bad idea because no one here would have use for them.

 

[JethroTullamore]

Kiwifarms dragon dongs.
Big ones.
That light up.

 

[Gig Bucking Fun]

“I <3 KF” shirts

 

[Stoneheart]

womans underwear,

 

[Postal_Rat]

May I present the kiwifarms transition kit containing estrogen, a rusty scalpel, two aspirin tablets, and 44 revolver one bullet

 

[Russian Bot]

Kiwifarms brand condoms.
It's a bad idea because no one here would have use for them.

That's ridiculous. You can use them for hilarious jokes like filling them full of petrol and putting them under someone's car bonnet. Once the petrol eats through the condom, it'll be an amazing prank, sure to make many top ten lists on youtube.

 

[Niggaplease]

kiwi farms brand condoms branded to prevent the conception of tard babies, with comercials to boot...
although the catch is they're manufactered from aliexpress from the cheapest and shadiest dealer so they'll break upon use.
kiwi farms cheap parfum its a knock off channel no5 with notes of kiwis made from the tears of children in china and horse piss.
hrt tonic made with horse piss.

 

[Testacles Maximus]

merkins

 

[Phalanges Mycologist]

A Nuke Kiwi Farmer calender.
A kiwi mobile phone.
A kiwifarms cook book.
A kiwifarms games console, Running TempleOS and comes preloaded with Sonic clones all themed like Sonichu.
@Null branded lipstic, starting with a nice lime green shade.
A Kiwifarms pot noodle, copying KingCobraJSF's style of cooking.