UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

View image on Twitter


spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[JustKiwiPosting]

Elon Musk needs to ban every X account from the UK that is advocating for this social media ban, especially accounts tied to government officials.

 

[SchizoDaemon]

‘Far-right fascist rag’ the Daily Mail today:
Ver archivo adjunto 9148285

These so-called "Neo-Nazis" probably include Carl Benjamin (aka Sargon) and other "centre-right" types.

Are they going to have an AI image of Ruper Lowe throwing Romans next?

 

[Mound Dweller]

I'm not a programmer or anything but couldn't they just make accessing the internet like buying tobacco if they really wanted to keep kids off it? Go to a store and you buy essentially an access code that you need to show ID to the cashier for, then give it to your ISP and you're good. I would trust that much more than any kind of government wanting to see my ID to access the internet.

Tha' wankin' loicense is an older meme from Theresa May's time, for a while they actually wanted to stick the "one time code ro acces 18+ content" thing in the snoopers charter IIRC, but thankfully gave up.

It's the same people that turn up.

It always is, the PA people are the Insulate Britain people are the JSO people are the Extinction rebellion people are the... my memory hole doesn't go that deep,. but I can safely bet they were the Stop the west War people too. "dissidents" of such kinds are the flipside of controlled opposition.

 

[F40PH]

I'm not a programmer or anything but couldn't they just make accessing the internet like buying tobacco if they really wanted to keep kids off it? Go to a store and you buy essentially an access code that you need to show ID to the cashier for, then give it to your ISP and you're good. I would trust that much more than any kind of government wanting to see my ID to access the internet.

I am so fucking tired of seeing stuff like this being suggested. I know you probably mean well by saying this, but no. I shouldn't have to participate in a humiliation ritual and identify myself to Ratesh in the local Paki shop so I can shitpost on the Internet.

The answer to protecting children from groomers and pornography is to actually actively parent your kids and monitor what they do and who they may be interacting with online. I have a kid who's at that age where they're showing interest in videogames and online media their friends talk about at school, but I don't just throw them in front of an iPad completely unsupervised. If they want to watch shit on YouTube or play a videogame, they do so in the living room on the TV while me or their mum actively participates in what they're doing and we have set rules about how much of it they're allowed to consume. They don't have personal devices that they can just access the Internet with at their own leisure. I worked in the online space, specifically moderating websites aimed at teenagers back in the early 2000's, and I know what sort of shit goes on in these spaces. I'm not offering my kid up like a banquet to a bunch of paedophiles online because I have an IQ above 50 and understand the risk.

I have a relative who's let her kid play Roblox and watch YouTube horror game content on their own since they were tiny. Headphones in, head down, out of sight out of mind, and they're the most withdrawn and sad looking kid imaginable. For the longest time, I had some sympathy for parents who are overworked, tired, just wanted to keep the kids quiet and gave them some benefit of the doubt, "maybe they just don't understand the danger they're putting their kids in" I told myself, but after thinking about it for years I've come to the conclusion that they deserve none of it. It's just bad parenting from irresponsible dipshits.

Think about it: Literally everyone aged between 25 - 40 had it hammered into them from the late 90's to the early 2010's to exercise some basic fucking common sense and not dox yourself to total strangers. There's Z E R O excuse for this shit, it's just straight up shitty parenting from irresponsible, selfish, lazy cunts who want a virtual babysitter because they can't be arsed raising their own kids. For all of the shit millennials like to give boomers and gen x, this sort of shit is peak boomer-attitude level stuff. Fat retards would rather cheer for deanonymising the entire Internet and destroying freedom of speech and information than actually just spending time with their own children. Fuck them. These people are shit-cunts.

Send the tophats, I don't even care. I'm so tired of this bullshit.

 

[ForTheHoard]

Elon Musk needs to ban every X account from the UK that is advocating for this social media ban, especially accounts tied to government officials.

I don't even think he should do that much. Elon should do literally nothing. If EU/UK tries to come after him or any American company for speech, double the price of their oil and LNG. Treat it like an act of war and punish them for even entertaining the idea.

 

[clickbait]

All the parents here who think they know better about raising a child than a Karen without one.

There'll always be parents who don't parent their kids. You know what they'll do? Log in to the internet for their kids.

Bad apples will still find ways to connect with bad apples. The one thing you don't want is bad apples connecting with bad apples in person, because then the cloudy mold will spread everywhere.

All the people championing this don't have kids or don't parent their kids and within a month or two they'll get fed up putting their ID online.

"Tired to sending your picture to the internet for verification? We're announcing a pass for the internet which is linked to your identification. Simply download the app, submit your docs, and now you can safely browse the internet without handing in your identification to the internet"

But in 6 or so months people will get used to it and stop getting mati.

The kids going cold turkey will be funny. I worry about the trans kids who'll detransition due to no longer getting their validating and affirmation online and sue the doctors enabling and validating their mental disorders.

 

[Unyielding Stupidity]

God she looks familiar. I'm thinking maybe monsters inc secretary. But could be something else.

Late, but she looks like someone left Boris Johnson in the microwave for 30 seconds.

 

[Quintex96]

I'm not a programmer or anything but couldn't they just make accessing the internet like buying tobacco if they really wanted to keep kids off it? Go to a store and you buy essentially an access code that you need to show ID to the cashier for, then give it to your ISP and you're good. I would trust that much more than any kind of government wanting to see my ID to access the internet.

>it's 2030
>want to browse t'farms for a bit while mum cooks tea
>hop on my bike because my car isn't net zero and got towed
>bike down to the paki shop as it's the closest
>grab a bottle of coke zero from the fridge
>notice some brown lads trying to coax some white school girls into the back
>say nothing because i'm not racist
>go to the counter
>"anything else mate?"
>yeah, an hours internet please
>"What's the reason for this purchase?"
>fancy a wank innit mate?
>"Sorry have to ask"
>that'll be £52.84
>blimey, that's almost 3 hours pay
>pay it and head home
>police pull me over on my bike
>"we noticed you just bought some internet, may we ask what for?"
>Get slightly distracted by the rape occurring just a few feet up the road
>Just gonna have a wank innit?
>They check my government mandated id
>"What is it you will be wanking to?"
>interracial, sir
>police take my bike for wasting their time
>walk home
>ask mum how long dinner will be
>illegal migrant new british citizen had a sexual emergency and mum got the text to go service him
>log onto my pc
>activate my hours internet
>enter the kiwi farms url
>realize i'm on chrome and not brave
>Screen flashes red
>SEDITIOUS MATERIAL DETECTED
>hear helicopter fly over
>multiple riot vans pull op outside
>counter terrorists kick in both doors
>multiple flashbangs get thrown in my room
>get beat and dragged outside
>courts give me maximum sentence
>thrown in all paki jail
>get shanked within minutes of being there
>At least i'm not speaking German

 

[SchizoDaemon]

In the beginning of the development of the internet there was a plan to build in some sort of toll system so that you would have to pay to access data from certain sites, if we actually implemented something like that it would dramatically cut down on spam and such.

We already have that on this site, you have to do PoW as a spam prevention mechanism..

Similar things where you send zaps (basically BTC Lightning transactions) to send messages, have a server do some work for you, etc. It's basically microtransactions on steroids.

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

Ver archivo adjunto 8393236>It's 2028
>You go to your local Tesco with your ID card to pick up your 15 minute internet ration
>The agent takes a look at you and says that you've luckily not been subjected to interrogation today
>You go home and type in the 54 digit alphanumeric code
>You're greeted with the login screen that requires you to use your webcam to show your ID again, better to be safe than sorry.
>You are finally on the internet with a choice of two links, BBC news and Curated Content
>You have a quick read through of how Labour are currently at 103% satisfaction in opinion polls, before reading an article from Culture Secretary Ahmed Al Shazah about how to enjoy reading in accordance with Islamic teachings
>Thoroughly satisfied with news you click on the curated content link to see photos of cats in pyjamas
>While loading image 6 the internet cuts off.

That was nice, I can't wait to get back on the internet next month

Called it

 

[A-Logato]

You know what is the worst part about living in the UK? You get a 3rd world level of living but you don't get to enjoy any of the fun of that since you have the state staring down upon you and banning/managing everything that's fun.

We don't even get the nice weather.

 

[Muppetstudios]

On the social media ban for under 16s I just heard a Tranny on Novara Media say if weren't for social media they wouldn't have discovered they were trans....

Shut it down now if kicking treens of Tiktok will cause trans genocide I'm all for it now.

 

[Product Placement]

On the social media ban for under 16s I just heard a Tranny on Novara Media say if weren't for social media they wouldn't have discovered they were trans....

Shut it down now if kicking treens of Tiktok will cause trans genocide I'm all for it now.

Social media is the main way troons groom kids. Without it, numbers would fall.

Look at the freak outs on leftwing sites, and they all say what that troon is.

 

[AssignedEva]

The kids going cold turkey will be funny.

I do wonder what will happen when they go cold turkey. A lot of them are used to TikTok, Snapchat etc on their phones, so it's not necessarily as simple as downloading Mullvad, because the attempted US ban demonstrated those apps seemingly function based off of SIM card region.
On paper they could all just get an older brother to unlock it, because in theory the ID verification wouldn't be retaining IDs to compare between users as it'd be a huge security risk.... in theory. Goodness knows what will actually be in this bill.
If all these kids suddenly don't have access to their distractions of choice... there'll be an awful lot of bored teenagers with very few outlets. It's not like there's really youth centres and the like any more.

 

[femboy fart huffer]

Just create burner gmail accounts using fake names

Genuine question. Have you tried making a gmail account recently while using any sort of vpn or tor? Because I have. It does not fucking work. It will always demand you to link some sort of other email which cannot be a one time disposable email or anything like that, or it will want your phone number or to verify with the app. There is no way to make a gmail account without exposing at least some part of your real identity in 2026. This is true for basically every other email service too.

Like mate you can't even fucking watch a youtube video in 2026 without having to go through captcha or whatever if you're using a vpn. If you're using tor then fucking hell you have to cycle nodes every 10 minutes because the video will cut out and refuse to keep loading. And then obviously half of those nodes are blocked, the other half will demand captcha or some shit too.

Monero and Mullvad. Done!

Ok yea. Let me just accept that I have to spent yet more fucking money on yet another service just to do something that is literally just my human fucking rights without the government arresting me for something that has been explicitly said I am perfectly within my rights to say. Because the government stealing half my fucking money and then demanding I pay them a subscription to just own a house and a car and then spend even more on fucking extortionately priced food and electricity and heating and the dog and fucking everything else.

Yea let me just buy some crypto. Oh ok so I need to first give them my credit card details. Well that's already defeated the point. Maybe I can find some irl machine to push cash into. That's fair. Oh now I need to go through a kyc process to do anything with it, of course that involves giving them way more information than just using the first google chrome extension result for vpns will harvest from me. Or maybe I should just finally get a better computer and mine some crypto and do it that way. Yea hold on let me just have a quick look at the market. How is literally every fucking component price doing I wonder?

I don't want a fucking vpn or tor or crypto or fake gmails or any of that shit. I want to just fucking laugh at some retards and talk to people about this country and life in general on a level above that of a fucking child for the most part. I'm a simple man. I have a nice woman and I have a dog that I've wanted since childhood. I should be happy right now. Yes work fucking sucks but the people I work with at least make the physical pains worth it. I should be happy. But somehow despite that the government can still fucking find a way to fuck all of that up. I don't want to do any of this shit any more than I want to hire a personal armed security guard. It should not be something I have to even consider. But hey I could have all of that for fucking free and not have to work if I was just a fucking paki and came here illegally. Isn't that just wonderful?

Especially Discord. Isn't it a massive vector for child porn?

I'm not saying it isn't. And I'm not saying that your kids should be allowed to use discord carte blanche. But every social media is full of child rapists. Any social media site has rings of paedophiles trading child pornography. Any site that lets you interact with other people will always result in some form of exploitation or grooming. Discord gets a lot of shit, deservedly so, but the rest do not get enough shit. Discord is just where all of the paedophiles take conversations. It normally starts on one of the more public platforms and then sharing discord id on there to talk privately. It is much easier for a child to use discord safely than most other social media sites. If you just block joining servers or anything like that and lock it to just being a messaging app between people you know then that's fine. People can't really find them or expose them to anything like that. Whereas twitter or facebook or instagram and so on, they're pretty hard to make safe for a kid because the nature of posting on there is that it's meant to be publicly accessible and it's very easy for kids to accidentally find fetish porn that bypasses normal blockers for that sort of material. And then you have the absolute do not ever touch things like snapchat or multiplayer minecraft or roblox. Especially roblox where doing nothing will still result in porn being pushed to the child.

This is the face of a demon.

He looks like he's in a Chris Hansen sting. Still fucking baffling that the most important person in this country politically can be ratioed on twitter. We need to bring seppuku to England.

 

[Mound Dweller]

Genuine question. Have you tried making a gmail account recently while using any sort of vpn or tor? Because I have. It does not fucking work.

It works just fine, you're just using a shitty VPN that's been flagged as sus, MullVad does this sometimes too but you can just switch connections and all of a sudden it once again just works, especially as soon as you figure out which node the glowies are using which is mysteriously unblocked everywhere.

I don't want a fucking vpn or tor or crypto or fake gmails or any of that shit.

It's called SimpleLogin and it takes 30 seconds to setup, you have the IQ to muse poetic about ass blasting, you can figure out how Proton addresses work.

 

[A-Logato]

If all these kids suddenly don't have access to their distractions of choice... there'll be an awful lot of bored teenagers with very few outlets. It's not like there's really youth centres and the like any more

They'll do what most young kids do these days. Hang around on street corners with other chavs/roadmen and be obnoxious little shits. If anything I feel bad for the kids that don't fall into that stereotype or have social issues/lack of friends who will now have it ripped away from them and wont have much of anything to do.

 

[Ted's Cabin]

It works just fine, you're just using a shitty VPN that's been flagged as sus, MullVad does this sometimes too but you can just switch connections and all of a sudden it once again just works, especially as soon as you figure out which node the glowies are using which is mysteriously unblocked everywhere.

It's called SimpleLogin and it takes 30 seconds to setup, you have the IQ to muse poetic about ass blasting, you can figure out how Proton addresses work.

This is a classic case of autistics (severe) thinking that because they mitigated the symptoms of a problem, they've solved the problem. The complaint obviously isn't about if you can get around an authoritarian government fucking with you. It's about the indignity of being treated like a chinese peasant for merely following the law.

 

[Mound Dweller]

This is a classic case of autistics (severe) thinking that because they mitigated the symptoms of a problem, they've solved the problem. The complaint obviously isn't about if you can get around an authoritarian government fucking with you. It's about the indignity of being treated like a chinese peasant for merely following the law.

I suppose you'd rather a more chemical solution, mr Operation Gladio?
Symptom? ha! Our gov being totalitarian shitters isn't a mere viral infection, I actually have to fucking live here m8 and prefer to do so the best way I can, there is no dignity in suffering.

 

[Heinrich Maneuver]

Green Party seems to be in support of the ban without outright saying it, or am I misreading? (X)

Reacting to the announcement by Keir Starmer of a ban from social media for under-16s, a Green Party spokesperson said:

“The Green Party welcomes action to address the harms social media can cause to young people. The impact on mental health and online safety is well documented as is the huge concern among parents, teachers and many young people themselves. Stronger safeguards are clearly needed. We also need to guard against potentially more dangerous platforms setting up.

“However, organisations including the NSPCC and the Molly Rose Foundation have warned that a blanket ban could leave some young people, particularly disabled and LGBTQIA people, more isolated and cut off from support. We also need to see real investment in youth services and creative activities for young people to fill the void that will be created by this ban.

“Social media companies that profit from addictive algorithms targeted at children must not be let off the hook. We need stronger regulation, better digital safety education, and tougher action to hold these platforms and their billionaire owners accountable.”

'a blanket ban could leave some young people... more isolated... need to see real investment in youth services' - if the ban goes ahead, we need youth clubs and more support for fags. 'the void that will be created by this ban' they aren't calling for the ban to be reversed. 'stronger safeguards' and 'tougher action'? Need to 'guard against potentially more dangerous platforms setting up'?