B- Movies

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Can we talk about the best B-movies?

Now, B-Movies are usually confined to the Sci-Fi/Action/ or Horror genre, but there are exceptions to the rule. Let's discuss our favorites. You know you have at least one.

They're movies that are not exactly good, but there's just something interesting or satisfying about them.

horror-express.jpg

Horror Express

This one is hands down my favorite B-movie The film is about an alien life form that is frozen in a block of ice, inside the host of a prehistoric humanoid. It was discovered by a scientist played by Christopher Lee, who is taking his findings back to Europe on the trans Siberia line. However, the creature in the crate defrosts during the trip and proves to still be alive. It is also able to jump from person to person, and even revive corpses. The film is a very loose adaptation of John Campbell's novella "Who Goes There?" which was eventually given a more faithful adaptation in " John Carpenter's The Thing"

This film features the inseparable horror duo of Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing, who...ironically don't do very much during the movie. The main focus of the movie is actually on the alien itself, and on a Russian Monk who serves as a "spiritual advisor" for a Polish Count and Countess, as a very obvious stand-in for Grigori Rasputin. This monk soon becomes a host for the creature, thinking it is Satan on Earth, and in awe of it's power, renounces his faith and offers his eternal service to the creature.

It's like, what if you combined the The Thing with Murder on the Orient Express, with a bit of pre-communist Russia folklore (yes, Rasputin was a real person, but he has so many stories about him that cannot be verified, that he is practically a folklore figure)

It's campy, it's shlocky, but damn it, it's fun, and it actually manages to be pretty creepy during certain parts. The only thing I didn't really care for was Cushing and Lee. They're both great actors, and I love them both, but honestly, I didn't feel like they were needed for this movie. In fact, they're somewhat distracting, because while you are watching the film for the first time, you keep expecting more from their characters in the film, but that never really happens. They're major protagonists that ALMOST feel like background characters.

Also, the film is in the public domain, so it's quite easy to find a place online to watch this movie for free, if I've piqued your curiosity
 
My favorites:

Jubilee by Derek Jarman

Any of the Hammer Horror Films

The original House on Haunted Hill

Any of the original B&W Dick Tracey movies (Fuck the Disney version)

Up! by Russ Meyer

Taking it all off starring Kitten Natvidad
 
Even if it transcended the B-movie stigma long ago and is widely recognized as an all-time "great" film, The Terminator (1984) is still very much a B-movie, a "creature" film (killer cyborgs from the future count as "creatures") produced outside of the major studio system on a relatively modest budget ($6.4 million in 1984 dollars would adjust to about $15.7 million U.S. today, on the higher end of B-movie budgets but still a tiny budget compared to modern blockbusters).

I wouldn't argue that Terminator 2: Judgment Day, which was still technically an independent film, is a B-movie since Terminator 2 had a hundred million dollar budget, but the first one certainly qualifies.

Another 1984 movie that is a little easier to think of as a B-movie, Night of the Comet, holds up pretty well on a $770,000 budget, which is only about an eighth of even The Terminator's budget. It's easily my favourite movie based on the I Am Legend premise (i.e. different from a regular Romero-style zombie movie in that most people vanished instead of being "turned" and the zombies retained their human intelligence and can speak more or less normally).
 
Dungeon Siege.
Killing Zoe.
Land and Freedom.
Last Man Standing.
Last of the Dogmen.
Ninth Gate.
The Crazies.
The Jack Bull.
30DaysofNight.
The Colony.
The Day.
Matewan.
ZarDoz.
 
Última edición:
I love 70s/80s/90s B-horror flicks, and Intruder is most definitely the Citizen Kane of 80s B-horror slashers. Some of the greatest composed shots I've seen in a horror film.
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Also, there is a ton of great B-noir out there, like D.O.A. and Murder By Contract


DOA1950.jpg



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Also, can't forget the string of amazing low budget gangster movies that The Godfather left in its wake, chief among them Massacre Mafia Style (which I think this board would really enjoy), Crazy Joe, and Family Enforcer.



 
That one's kinda neat. Sean Connery's brother Neil and a ton of people who were in Bond movies.

Creation of the Humanoids
Picture the result if Ed Wood got a two paragraph synopsis of Blade Runner.

After the Atomic War humanity ain't doing so good. Society's rebuilt but the birth rate's declining fast. Androids are the second-class citizens of society and some humans are concerned about these dirty clickers getting too uppity.
With Dudley Manlove of Plan 9 fame and makeup effects by the guy who did the old Universal monster effects.

Also the origins of the design for those guys in that Alien game.
 
The puppet master series and demonic puppet. So all good as well as evil bone. It is really dumb and terribly acted. and obnoxious, but it is a great movie. It's just such a dumb movie that it's fun to watch.
 
2001: A Space Odyssey
How? It's long enough to have an intermission, making it the feature film.

Them!

The proto Starship Troopers without the bug lover spin. We know ants go to war with other ants IRL, so why wouldn't supersized ants wage war on humanity? I'm surprised no one mentioned it in this thread. Maybe it's too normie of a choice, but it's what I mean when I say B movies were limited by tech limitations and not cheap shit.

Earth vs. the Spider

It's not my favorite in terms of actually watching it, but I do have more to say about it because there's more plot holes to criticize. So a lot of this movie involves running into and out of a giant spider's cave in the woods. Now, even if this movie wasn't about a giant spider, it's still dumb to go into a cave in the wilderness because a bear or a mountain lion might be living in it. I'm calling the cops to file a missing persons report rather than go into the cave myself. But they did anyways and fell in the spider's web, which was just hemp rope that wasn't sticky or anything because they could climb out of it.

Then the town managed to knock out the spider believing it's dead and stored it in the school gym where the prom was going to be held. Which leads to this lol line:

"We're going to play loud enough to wake up the dead!"

Now, I'm pretty sure that teenage girls in the 1950s IRL have no desire to dance near a giant spider corpse, so that date is going to be a bad time even if the spider was dead. Which it wasn't because it woke up, freaked out the town where it went home. The girl is pretty dumb since she forgot her bracelet in the cave and goes back even though she knew it's a giant spider cave. I don't care that it's a memento, normal people write off jewelry if it's guarded by a giant monster.

The Blob

One thing that most people don't realize because it's a dumb monster movie is characters actually use the scientific method on the Blob. They tried throwing acid on it and shooting it before Steve McQueen figured out it's vulnerable to ice and got the town to freeze it with CO2. Now, you can say those are dumb attempts to kill it, but they tried at all and learned not to do that again. Most horror movies don't apply the scientific method or even have thinking characters because if characters were capable of using logic, the movie wouldn't be scary. Which is kind of the case with this movie. A lot of this movie is Steve trying to convince the cops the Blob was real only to be told he was drunk.
 
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