💼 Careercow Andrew Dobson (aka Tom Preston)

[Sonic Speed Monkey]

If Dobbers REALLY cared about animals, he'd, y'know, do something about actual animal abuse cases. Maybe donate to or volunteer at animal shelters, foster a puppy, spread awareness of certain farms that don't treat their critters right, etc.

But no, he'd rather bitch about fictional animal abuse in a fictional game involving fictional animals. That's totally the upstanding thing to do.

 

[Ravana]

He did it again!

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There's no more context to this picture.

I want this to blow up in his face so badly.

 

[Gothicserpent]

This man has no testicles.

 

[Johnny Bravo]

This man has no testicles.

He did once but, well, what do you think happens when you stick a bicycle pump up your pee hole?

 

[Sanae Kochiya]

Fucking hell...

[MEDIA=twitter]630869740420886528[/MEDIA]

The following happens in Skyrim:

Cannibalism.
Rape.
Sex trafficking.
Racism.
Murder.
Imprisonment and being turned into cattle.
People never shutting up about how their careers were ended by an arrow to the knee.

And Dobson chooses this particular aspect to bitch about.

 

[Ti-99/4A]

I don't keep up with video games, but maybe someone could send him a list of games that have no killing of any kind? All I can think of at the top of my head is Tetris.

 

[Trans Fat 41g]

I don't keep up with video games, but maybe someone could send him a list of games that have no killing of any kind? All I can think of at the top of my head is Tetris.

Then he'd complain about Tetris not having some humane cause of sorts.

 

[Johnny Bravo]

I don't keep up with video games, but maybe someone could send him a list of games that have no killing of any kind? All I can think of at the top of my head is Tetris.

Rocket League.

The cars are basically giant RCs so even when they crash and explode there's no death. It also supports online multiplayer and team battles. 100% less violent than Splatoon.

 

[Ravana]

Animal Crossing would seem like a good fit. The villagers all love you regardless of how much of a shit you are.

 

[Ti-99/4A]

Animal Crossing would seem like a good fit. The villagers all love you regardless of how much of a shit you are.

It's even a Nintendo game! I only know that from following Chris.

 

[AnimuGinger]

Animal Crossing would seem like a good fit. The villagers all love you regardless of how much of a shit you are.

What happens to all of those fish and bugs you catch and sell? Better not risk it. It might hurt Dobbles' feelings.

And then he'd just draw inflation porn of the villagers.

 

[JU 199]

Fucking hell...

[MEDIA=twitter]630869740420886528[/MEDIA]

 

[Von Clausewitz]

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You forgot: "Now with 100% more lesbians!"

 

[Johnny Bravo]

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It has two factions: the Legion of Wu and the Patriarchy, but attempting to join Patriarchy auto-kills you and erases your save game.

 

[millais]

"Amazing gameplay at a stunning 12 frames per second! So smooth you'd think it's real!"

 

[JU 199]

You forgot: "Now with 100% more lesbians!"

 

[Bugaboo]

Fictional animal abuse is the worse kind of animal abuse also sexist views that come from fictional characters is worthy of death

 

[Sonic Speed Monkey]

Animal Crossing would seem like a good fit. The villagers all love you regardless of how much of a shit you are.

Not to mention there's a blue bear in it named Kody. He's actually a likable character, though, unlike Dobbear.

 

[FK 635]

Then he'd complain about Tetris not having some humane cause of sorts.

Not to mention the lack of lesbians. Or stuff to complain about. He does like to complain...

 

[Spellskite]

I don't keep up with video games, but maybe someone could send him a list of games that have no killing of any kind? All I can think of at the top of my head is Tetris.

Hilariously enough, Metal Gear Solid games are almost all capable of being beaten with non-lethal runs (besides boss battles). MGSV will also feature an animal raising system, where you can bring animals from the wild in to your base to raise and train for support missions.

But Dobson thinks Kojima is satan, so fat chance of him ever giving the series a chance.