💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Neko GF]

Archive (480p):

 

[rubytintedchix]

Rock out with your discouts.

 

[Aaway]

dear lord that looks ghastly

easily one of the most disgusting looking things he's made in a while

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=FCPVHn9tPxI

Before this I had never even heard of "Christmas Soup".

And I really wish I never heard of it. That looks beyond foul.

 

[Burd Turglar]

Before this I had never even heard of "Christmas Soup".

And I really wish I never heard of it. That looks beyond foul.

That's not soup my dude, that's the bastard son of white trash queso dip and white trash salsa. As much as I loathe this heathen, I still cringe whenever I see him prop the stroke hand on shit as if it still works.

Oh and btw, there are "Christmas soups" but they're typically just based on various European nations winter soups i.e. a nice potato soup or the like.

 

[LordofCringe7206]

Oh please, Jack could have his foot removed because of diabetes and he'd still be shoving carbs and refined sugar down his throat telling himself that it was due to all those energy drinks and coffee he was drinking. Jack is the kind of person that once he's done with his diet or exercise program runs out and starts eating like shit again because he's been such a "good boy" and this is his reward for doing so.

He doesn't have the discipline to keep at something even like moderate exercise for too long.

That's one of the most frustrating things about him and why so many people have legitimate hatred towards him. He has been given so many opportunities to improve his life, so many second chances that he doesn't deserve. Second chances others would give their lives up to have a crack at. And yet he has never fixed his life, getting himself on to a better path that keeps him happier and healthier.

This man is an asshole who is wasting what he shouldn't have been given in the first place.

 

[Aaway]

That's not soup my dude, that's the bastard son of white trash queso dip and white trash salsa. As much as I loathe this heathen, I still cringe whenever I see him prop the stroke hand on shit as if it still works.

Oh and btw, there are "Christmas soups" but they're typically just based on various European nations winter soups i.e. a nice potato soup or the like.

yeah, a "christmas soup" shouldn't be eaten with fucking tortilla chips. unless it's a spin on a chicken tortilla soup (which this is not)

 

[Aurelianus]

Before this I had never even heard of "Christmas Soup".

And I really wish I never heard of it. That looks beyond foul.

That's because as mentioned a while back when he was teasing this, it comes from this website (archive) which is why he's doing the thing again where he doesn't post a recipe or talk about portions, and only talked about how he was reading it.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=FCPVHn9tPxI

I decided to do my homage to an @Adamska style review/summary, so here it goes.

1. Starts off the video by talking about the .STORE website again. I'm sure a lot of your viewers are aspiring entrepreneurs looking to open a Tennis Shoe store.
1a. "I've seen my sales go up" Yeah, because even if one poor guy bought a domain, that's an infinite percentage growth from zero.
2. "I read the instructions" Since you're a cooking show, why not link to the domain or where you got it from?
2a. "I'll just call it a Lazy Man's Christmas Soup" It's a Christmas Soup, that's what the author named it.
3. Opens to the splash screen of Lazy Man's recipes. Whatever stock footage Jack pulled this from is how I'm going to be feeling after watching this.
4. Jack's already messed up the recipe by having three different types of diced tomatoes. Recipe calls for diced, stewed and Rotel original tomatoes.
4a. While not an error directly, he's using chicken bone broth. Recipe calls for chicken stock but from a "professional chef" it would have been nice to mention that bone broth is more similar to stock than broth since not everyone knows this.
4b. I'm not really sure where he got the idea for using parsley from.
5. Jack stating the obvious that pressure cookers cook food quicker than a slow cooker. Reason you're using a slow cooker is so you can go do stuff through the day instead of constantly paying attention to your food.
6. Jack's already heavy breathing just adding the tomatoes in the slow cooker.
6a. If he was doing the recipe properly this is where you'd break up your stewed tomatoes, but nope, he just chucks all his diced tomatoes in.
7. "I'm using chicken bone broth because it's healthier"
7a. No measurement given on how much to use, so this video is useless to someone trying to seriously make this dish.
8. "It doesn't tell me to put the basil in right now but I'm choosing to do it cuz I want this flavor cooked in" Except that's not how you use basil in a dish at all, you add it last so the oils and flavors don't get messed up.
8a. No directions on how much basil to use.
9. "It's about half of a Velveeta" How big is half of a Velveeta? I know there are big blocks and little blocks.
9a. "You want to cut your cheese in one inch slices" Thanks for pretty much confirming you're using the same recipe I'm looking at.
10. While cooking the first part of the soup, Jack complains about the rotini box having no directions on how to cook it.
10a. No video shown of him making up the rotini at all, just cuts back to the soup.
11. After cooking it for an hour it already looks vile, like an omelette that never solidified.
12. Jack screwing up the recipe again by adding his seasoning way too early, this time the red pepper flakes. Red pepper flakes go in at the end just like the basil he's now cooked.
12a. Jack adds an actually okay amount of flakes in, but that's because the recipe calls for only a tiny amount. Not that he tells you how much to use after all.
13. "Oops" Jack on splashing the sour cream into the pot, then taps the bowl on the side of the Crock-Pot for a solid 5 seconds trying to get the remaining sour cream out. Could have just scooped it out with a spoon, even single handed.
13a. "That's good" Jack mutters under his breath as he puts the bowl down.
14. "Look at that, it's just getting creamier and creamier!" Jack excitedly says as he mixes up the cup of sour cream. Definitely a wet food fetish moment here.
14a. "Oh yeah" Jack says, orgasmic at the pot of cheese he's made up.
15. Jack struggles to get the now cooked pasta out of the flimsy silicon bowl he has into the slow cooker.
15a. "Oh my gosh! It's looking Christmas-y now!" Jack getting excited again at stirring the Pot O' Cheese.
16. Jack says to tilt the lid barely off to get the humidity out. Not sure where he's getting this from because it's nowhere in the directions at all.
16a. "Break open your chips because we're getting to the end spot" Why open them up now? You have another hour of cooking at least.
17. Transitions to the now "cooked" soup, which looks like water. I've seen budget macaroni and cheese sauces look better than this.
17a. "Look at that consistency, it's only going to get thicker as it cools" Then why show us how runny the soup is?
17b. "You just cook it down to the thickness you want. But remember, it's a soup not a stew" Jack sounds annoyed when he says the word stew. Even the author admits you can make it the consistency of queso if you want to if you cook it down a bit more.
18. Jack is amazed at guacamole tortilla chips, again screwing up because you're supposed to use scoop shape chips and he's using standard shaped ones.
18a. This is the part where you'd add the red peppers and basil in, but Jack's just jamming them halfway into his pot/bowl with a handle.
18b. I just noticed even though showing the viewer parsley earlier, I'm not even sure if he even did add the parsley into the soup.
19. "Let's give this a try" as Jack instead cuts to a rant on how we should stop arguing, start watching Christmas movies, and start listening to Christmas music and how Thanksgiving is over and we need to be in the Christmas spirit now.
19a. Jack is very angry and is shaking his giant spoon at the camera.
19b. "And by the way, buy somebody an extension from dot store (.STORE) because they're our sponsor today okay?" Immediately after rambling about the Christmas spirit.
20. Finally he tries it out with said giant spoon, and with not showing how it looks when cooled and from a distance it still looks like a runny mess. Not much giraffe here.
21. Jack exhales before giving a "Hmmph" and looking at the ceiling before going "Wow, that's cheesy, hold on" and grabbing a tortilla chip.
21a. You can see how runny it is still because it's dripping off back into the bowl/pot.
21b. Jack looks at the ceiling again before going "Okay, yeah, I gotta go. We're gonna take this and we'll see you later, okay?" with the video just ending with him grabbing the dip and walking off camera.
21c. You can tell based on the lack of any real feedback, the constant looking at the ceiling and the sudden abrupt cut at the end he really didn't like it much.

I can see where this is going, it's pretty much a hybrid of queso and almost like a tomato soup. Problem is it tries to be both and succeeds at doing neither. Might as well cook it down and make it into a game day queso dip instead of passing it off as a Christmas soup. Since this is one of those videos where Jack just takes someone else's recipe without crediting them or showing anything other than him making it, it's garbage as a cooking instructional and makes me feel like I'm watching the cooking part of a mukbang video.

 

[Bumwine]

Chef John just released an easy beef Wellington recipe. It can’t be a troll, can it? He seems too nice for that sort of thing.

Same as JunsKitchens,maybe there is a Qanon style conspiracy on Youtube to troll Jack?

 

[JoeFlorida]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=FCPVHn9tPxI

Idk why but the sound of the soup splashing when Jack was whisking in the sour cream and him saying "It's getting creamier and creamier" kind of made me feel a little sick.

 

[Trig.Point]

Same as JunsKitchens,maybe there is a Qanon style conspiracy on Youtube to troll Jack?

https://youtube.com/watch?v=uktwCTwP47Y

You know Rachel from Rachel and Jun, used to be an US Air Force officer. She got a posting to South Korea, and because there's a chemical and biological weapons threat from the North,had to take a cocktail of drugs before deploying. She got an alergic reaction, organ failure and nearly died. Then got a medical discharge and married Jun.

She mentioned it very casually in passing on an AMA. She doesn't fucking whinge about it, ask for sympathy or just generally act like a whiney bitch. She keeps everything nice and upbeat and makes videos about cats, and shit. While her husband does cooking videos.

9a. "You want to cut your cheese in one inch slices" Thanks for pretty much confirming you're using the same recipe I'm looking at.

She explains better what the intent of it is. ie it's a christmas eve meal with minimal prep, because most likely you're getting ready for christmas day dinner.

 

[saralovesjuicyfruit]

That's because as mentioned a while back when he was teasing this, it comes from this website (archive) which is why he's doing the thing again where he doesn't post a recipe or talk about portions, and only talked about how he was reading it.



I decided to do my homage to an @Adamska style review/summary, so here it goes.

1. Starts off the video by talking about the .STORE website again. I'm sure a lot of your viewers are aspiring entrepreneurs looking to open a Tennis Shoe store.
1a. "I've seen my sales go up" Yeah, because even if one poor guy bought a domain, that's an infinite percentage growth from zero.
2. "I read the instructions" Since you're a cooking show, why not link to the domain or where you got it from?
2a. "I'll just call it a Lazy Man's Christmas Soup" It's a Christmas Soup, that's what the author named it.
3. Opens to the splash screen of Lazy Man's recipes. Whatever stock footage Jack pulled this from is how I'm going to be feeling after watching this.
4. Jack's already messed up the recipe by having three different types of diced tomatoes. Recipe calls for diced, stewed and Rotel original tomatoes.
4a. While not an error directly, he's using chicken bone broth. Recipe calls for chicken stock but from a "professional chef" it would have been nice to mention that bone broth is more similar to stock than broth since not everyone knows this.
4b. I'm not really sure where he got the idea for using parsley from.
5. Jack stating the obvious that pressure cookers cook food quicker than a slow cooker. Reason you're using a slow cooker is so you can go do stuff through the day instead of constantly paying attention to your food.
6. Jack's already heavy breathing just adding the tomatoes in the slow cooker.
6a. If he was doing the recipe properly this is where you'd break up your stewed tomatoes, but nope, he just chucks all his diced tomatoes in.
7. "I'm using chicken bone broth because it's healthier"
7a. No measurement given on how much to use, so this video is useless to someone trying to seriously make this dish.
8. "It doesn't tell me to put the basil in right now but I'm choosing to do it cuz I want this flavor cooked in" Except that's not how you use basil in a dish at all, you add it last so the oils and flavors don't get messed up.
8a. No directions on how much basil to use.
9. "It's about half of a Velveeta" How big is half of a Velveeta? I know there are big blocks and little blocks.
9a. "You want to cut your cheese in one inch slices" Thanks for pretty much confirming you're using the same recipe I'm looking at.
10. While cooking the first part of the soup, Jack complains about the rotini box having no directions on how to cook it.
10a. No video shown of him making up the rotini at all, just cuts back to the soup.
11. After cooking it for an hour it already looks vile, like an omelette that never solidified.
12. Jack screwing up the recipe again by adding his seasoning way too early, this time the red pepper flakes. Red pepper flakes go in at the end just like the basil he's now cooked.
12a. Jack adds an actually okay amount of flakes in, but that's because the recipe calls for only a tiny amount. Not that he tells you how much to use after all.
13. "Oops" Jack on splashing the sour cream into the pot, then taps the bowl on the side of the Crock-Pot for a solid 5 seconds trying to get the remaining sour cream out. Could have just scooped it out with a spoon, even single handed.
13a. "That's good" Jack mutters under his breath as he puts the bowl down.
14. "Look at that, it's just getting creamier and creamier!" Jack excitedly says as he mixes up the cup of sour cream. Definitely a wet food fetish moment here.
14a. "Oh yeah" Jack says, orgasmic at the pot of cheese he's made up.
15. Jack struggles to get the now cooked pasta out of the flimsy silicon bowl he has into the slow cooker.
15a. "Oh my gosh! It's looking Christmas-y now!" Jack getting excited again at stirring the Pot O' Cheese.
16. Jack says to tilt the lid barely off to get the humidity out. Not sure where he's getting this from because it's nowhere in the directions at all.
16a. "Break open your chips because we're getting to the end spot" Why open them up now? You have another hour of cooking at least.
17. Transitions to the now "cooked" soup, which looks like water. I've seen budget macaroni and cheese sauces look better than this.
17a. "Look at that consistency, it's only going to get thicker as it cools" Then why show us how runny the soup is?
17b. "You just cook it down to the thickness you want. But remember, it's a soup not a stew" Jack sounds annoyed when he says the word stew. Even the author admits you can make it the consistency of queso if you want to if you cook it down a bit more.
18. Jack is amazed at guacamole tortilla chips, again screwing up because you're supposed to use scoop shape chips and he's using standard shaped ones.
18a. This is the part where you'd add the red peppers and basil in, but Jack's just jamming them halfway into his pot/bowl with a handle.
18b. I just noticed even though showing the viewer parsley earlier, I'm not even sure if he even did add the parsley into the soup.
19. "Let's give this a try" as Jack instead cuts to a rant on how we should stop arguing, start watching Christmas movies, and start listening to Christmas music and how Thanksgiving is over and we need to be in the Christmas spirit now.
19a. Jack is very angry and is shaking his giant spoon at the camera.
19b. "And by the way, buy somebody an extension from dot store (.STORE) because they're our sponsor today okay?" Immediately after rambling about the Christmas spirit.
20. Finally he tries it out with said giant spoon, and with not showing how it looks when cooled and from a distance it still looks like a runny mess. Not much giraffe here.
21. Jack exhales before giving a "Hmmph" and looking at the ceiling before going "Wow, that's cheesy, hold on" and grabbing a tortilla chip.
21a. You can see how runny it is still because it's dripping off back into the bowl/pot.
21b. Jack looks at the ceiling again before going "Okay, yeah, I gotta go. We're gonna take this and we'll see you later, okay?" with the video just ending with him grabbing the dip and walking off camera.
21c. You can tell based on the lack of any real feedback, the constant looking at the ceiling and the sudden abrupt cut at the end he really didn't like it much.

I can see where this is going, it's pretty much a hybrid of queso and almost like a tomato soup. Problem is it tries to be both and succeeds at doing neither. Might as well cook it down and make it into a game day queso dip instead of passing it off as a Christmas soup. Since this is one of those videos where Jack just takes someone else's recipe without crediting them or showing anything other than him making it, it's garbage as a cooking instructional and makes me feel like I'm watching the cooking part of a mukbang video.

In my opinion, even the original recipe sounds nasty. On the recipe blog, she even says it’s like queso dip. Who the hell would want to put noodles in that and eat it like soup? Yuck.

 

[TERF Accountant]

After all, nothing says "Spirit of Christmas" quite like waterlogged fake cheese product, canned tomatoes, and poorly cooked pasta. I'm sure the virtueless-due to being overcooked basil also makes a person feel extra seasonally jolly!

 

[A Duck Selling Lemonade]

Same as JunsKitchens,maybe there is a Qanon style conspiracy on Youtube to troll Jack?

https://youtube.com/watch?v=uktwCTwP47Y

That looks awful.

 

[Neko GF]

Archive (480p):

 

[rubytintedchix]

Jack’s friend says something on this video that Jack feels the need to bleep out, instead of bleeping it, he uses a “boing boing boing” sound. After watching it a few times and mouth reading it looks like he’s shitting on Jack.

Later, Jack’s friend goes in the bathroom and comes out with what looks to be TP on his finger.

I cannot.

 

[AnOminous]

Same as JunsKitchens,maybe there is a Qanon style conspiracy on Youtube to troll Jack?

I always wondered about beef Wellington. Why not just eat the meat and have some biscuits too? What is the huge advantage here?

 

[captkrisma]

I always wondered about beef Wellington. Why not just eat the meat and have some biscuits too? What is the huge advantage here?

It's more of a flex than anything. You have these expensive as fuck ingredients like filet, paté, prosciutto ham, and you make a Frankenstein's monster of a meal with it all. It's like turducken, but much more expensive.

 

[JeNeComprendsPas420]

I always wondered about beef Wellington. Why not just eat the meat and have some biscuits too? What is the huge advantage here?

I mean why not just eat biscuits and apples instead of apple pie?

 

[A Duck Selling Lemonade]

I always wondered about beef Wellington. Why not just eat the meat and have some biscuits too? What is the huge advantage here?

It's really not a very great dish, but it's hard to make it well, and so chefs like to show their technical abilities by offering it. That's what I think.