So a month of rest and I see the worst dessert yet as a thumbnail. You know what this means...
1. Oh Jesus he's using club crackers for this? I'm very curious now on what bullshit he's making.
2. Only Jack can equate Christmas to sugar and diabetes.
3. Oh boy, Jack is still flagrantly lying about how the .store extension is a "sponsor"
3b. The more things change...
4. It's amusing he thinks his audience is made up of "aspiring businessmen" tbh, it's clear he just is faking his life now.
4b. Eh, if you include people who fall for MLM scams, maybe he has a point...
5. DO IT ~ Jack's Avatar on not taking his heart medicine
6. So the ingredients list is basically fudge on crackers... remove the crackers and use a decently dark chocolate and I'm game tbh.
7. Ah yes, white chocolate. I don't really care for the stuff tbh.
7b. Fun fact: you can actually feed dogs white chocolate with little risk of them dying, this is due to the chemical being associated with how dark the chocolate is. White chocolate is pretty safe.
8. Again, his ingredients are fine, it's basically fudge but without the condensed milk or the marshmallow fluff.
9. Hey Jack decided to look at the oven first; I guess he read my last runthrough a while back since he didn't do it until I mentioned it.
10. Jack's basically ignoring the caramel proto-mix as he lays down crackers.
10b. Mise en place logic would tell you to lay down that shit first, because while I'm no confectioner, I do know sugar and candy in general is very sensitive to heat.
11. Club crackers are at least not as bad as the Saltine idea he mentioned; I'd still much prefer to NOT have it and just make fudge instead tho.
12. JESUS WHY ARE YOU SPREADING YOUR ACTUAL DIARRHEA ONTO TH- oh wait, that's just the very poorly integrated butter-sugar mix that didn't melt together or clump.
12b. Seriously, it's just going to taste like gritty sweetness, no thank you.
13. Oh hey, Jack does a speed spread, he's actually doing editing holy shit.
14. The final spread is still uneven, but at least the grit seems to have dissolved somewhat.
15. While that shitmix is baking, Jack prepares the white chocolate.
15b. He's using white because no darks allowed... okay I'll leave.
16. Standard Jack excuse of "gOtTa UsE aLl ThE cHoCoLaTe!1!", when in reality his gluttony and zombified pancreas demands it.
17. Jack poorly explains what he's going to do with the food dyes.
17b. It's not like it wasn't obvious the moment he mentioned he was using white chocolate and them at the same time.
18. Honestly, since this is just a fudge recipe gone wrong, some things I'd add are chopped nuts (walnuts or peanuts) for savoriness and save a bit of that sugar mix to make a caramel drizzle.
19. Jack mixes in the chocolate with the dyes in different bowls.
20. "Is it WeT?" ~ Jack Scatalini
20b. For those wondering, he was talking about the cracker/caramel mix.
21. Yes, microwave the chocolate Jack, that'll save you from overpouring on it and not make a molten shitshow.
22. Jack channels Canada as he apologizes for not being smart enough to use a ziploc baggie and cut a corner to make an icing gun.
22b. Nice mint green splotches there.
23. Jack goes full wendigo mode and licks his area clean, like the beast he is.
24. MMM MMM LOOK AT THAT SWIRL OF VOMIT.
24b. Seriously, Jack is seriously impressed by red and green dye mixing together on top.
25. I guess this was an attempt to mimic a candy cane? I guess?
26. Ah yes, more sugar after having a layer of sugar. The M&Ms I at least understand.
27. "We're gonna crack it, 'cuz it's Christmas Crack" ~ A very excited for food Jack
28. Eh, I'm not gonna bust Jack on the using the freezer; it's genuinely true that it cools quicker that way.
29. Jack shows off some broken shards of pottery, oh wait, this is just his crackers and chocolate.
29b. Yeah, honestly I'd have made fudge instead... I think it'd be something people would like more than this.
30. Jack is confused on how the cracker will taste with the chocolate... probably fine since butter and sugar go together like fat and death.
31. Very hard edit. Wonder why?
32. Ahhh, he had to hide a face that didn't like it.
32b. You know when Jack says something's too sweet that it tastes like Willy Wonka's urine sample.
33. Last attempt to shill an extension that any bumbo can have.
Now I just want some fudge.