Jack shills the new video.
Bourbon street was empty because of a pandemic you simple fuck.
Jack glosses over the restrictions to his precious cafe du monde.
Jack still plans to go to NYC for pizza wars.
Jack bemoans a 'narrow shower', but fails to see that he is just a wide body.
Jack continues his first world problems by batching about the exercise center and valet parking not being available.
Jack says he's going to be taking suggestions. How about cooking the meat all the way through?
Jack swears he only took one bite of beinget, then says dipping it in coffee makes it better, then covers his fuck up by saying that Paul said it. It's okay to tell the truth, Jack. You don't have to lie to us.
Jack stated that he has cameras all over, thus denying Jr pushy and also implying that Jack might watch his son fuck.
"We trust Jack Jr., so thats why we took him on every vacation or left him with relatives".
Jack doesn't know what good bourbon tastes like, he just guzzles it down like a duck.
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Jack's so lazy he won't even choose a winner at random, he's just going to ask if you want something.
Jack refuses basic cooking safety and says the instructions told him to pour bourbon over an open flame.
Jack has no clue what Mardi Gras beads are for and claims they're like money or a status symbol. They're just decorations for Mardi Gras, don't read into it that much.
Jack is taking Brianna to Vegas in August to see the shows and watch a movie if theaters are still around. If you take a vacation to watch a movie in a theater...
Jack birches about the size of Uber cars. You can literally see what kind of car the driver drives by make and model once he or she accepts the ride. Worst case scenario, you have to get a SUV ride, which is more expensive and a longer wait. Jack also fails to understand the star rating system for Uber. If you have a shitty rating, you will be picked up less or given the less than desirable drivers. Paul never has issues because I can imagine Paul isn't a raging asshole to everyone not sucking his dick.
Jack didn't know you could grill oysters.
Jack do you ever skip church on Sunday? We're not going to get into that...
Jack has a shit load of vinyl. 3000 records.
Jambalaya is like pizza. What?
Jack used to sit unmasked in the "masks only section". Dick.
Jack name drop Old Hickory Steakhouse as a future "fancy dinner" with Big T. Here's hoping he goes to Nashville instead of Jackson, since the one in Jackson looks white trashy.
Jack goes nuts about wearing masks at 32 minutes.
Jack mocks science "if we all wear masks for two weeks it will be gone" THE VIRUS IS STILL HERE BECAUSE OF PEOPLE LIKE YOU.
Jack conflates the Japanese wearing the mask to the amount of congestion and smog. NO. It is to prevent others from getting sick!
Jack reads out how he wasted taxpayer dollars on stream.
Jack wants to salt brine a turkey. This will be a disaster.
