Shows/Movies that would suck if rebooted today

[FuckedUp]

I remember hearing about the Daria reboot a while back, but I've been thinking of other things that would suck if rebooted in today's climate, namely Moral Orel because it'd just be Orel being spanked for eating bugs and staying inside during a LITERAL PLAGUE and shit. Any other things that would inherently make fucking awful reboots with Current Year's overton window?

 

[Florence Sargent]

Avatar The Last Airbender. I recently started re-watching it and it has all the makings of the perfect virtue signalling show. Different races, them vs. us, international politics, people with disabilities, strong women warriors, corrupt government and overthrows, etc, etc.

Yet somehow it was a good fucking show. It was oversimplified in a way that handled the topics broadly and fairly. The live action reboot is coming up and I can't help but think it's going to be painfully "WOKE".

 

[The Wichita Lion]

Perfect Strangers, it would be set in LA with Larry as a danger hair troon and Balki as an illegal.

 

[verissimus]

A better question to ask is what show or movie (or perhaps game and comic) could be rebooted that wouldn't suck considering both the current "climate" in the entertainment industry and their awful track record when it comes to reboots/remakes.

 

[Stoneheart]

Married with children. no explaination needed--

 

[Irrelevant]

Lexx fits perfectly within the current Overton window but would be awful if rebooted by actual woke writers.

 

[knightlautrec]

All of them. Reboots are almost always bad or unnecessary. 'Do you like this thing? How about this thing without everything you like about the original including actors and story and setting. Woo'

 

[Stoneheart]

Lexx fits perfectly within the current Overton window but would be awful if rebooted by actual woke writers.

I never watched it because the ship looked stupid and there was so much scifi around, is it good?

 

[WhoBusTank69]

Married with children. no explaination needed--

It would probably be exactly the same but with different timing on the laugh tracks, let's face it. It was a painfully honest show.

 

[JambledUpWords]

Clueless (1995). The movie has diversity and all, but if it were remade today, Cher would probably be non-white and she’d be a STRONG POWERFUL WOMAN (even more than in the original, think Disney live-action Beauty and the Beast). I’d imagine Cher not ending up with any guy (or if she does end up with someone, it’s another woman). The movie’s charm would be destroyed by injecting modern day politics into it (especially since it’s supposed to be a run-of-the-mill chick flick).

 

[nekrataal]

Falling down, that movie was perfect at the time it was filmed. I don’t think it’d be quite as well accepted these days.

 

[Dom Cruise]

Eureka on the Sci Fi channel, it'd be an embarrassing "wuv da science" type show with a bunch of dangerhairs now.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

30 Rock, which is sad considering it's still kinda recent as TV shows go

 

[Lvl.420 Space_Weed]

I'll call it now Bill & Ted 3

 

[Van Darkholme]

I hope they never remake Back to the Future.

 

[Salubrious]

Blazing Saddles

 

[Duncan Hills Coffee]

Original James Bond. Any movie from the Connery era and the original Fleming character that was openly misogynist (and I say that unironically).

 

[Strange Wilderness]

Con-Air: Too much time would be spent criticizing the prison system instead of just having a few lines about it, Nic Cage would be a POC unjustly imprisoned because of a racist judge, maybe it would be Sally can't Dance. The cons would either be sympathetic victims of the racist justice system instead of over the top psychopaths they were in the original or a planeload of Aryan Brotherhood members who are pure evil.

Team America: Team America are pure evil white males full of Toxic Masculinity while F.A.G. and Xi Jinping are the heroes fighting to take them down. The "Dicks, Pussys, Assholes" speech is gone because it glorifies rape culture and the patriarchy.

Animal House: Ever see Neighbors 2? Yep that's what it would be

Strange Wilderness: A bunch of Twitch streamers and thots play footage of Zoo Tycoon and shill for the Green New Deal. Anything involving marijuana and dick jokes are gone and Bigfoot is disproved by a post from I Fucking Love Science

 

[JambledUpWords]

New Girl: The tv show is very early 2010s in terms of humor and plot devices. The cast is diverse, but it’s far too straight for [CURRENT YEAR]. On top of it, the main black character, Winston, is a cop and that wouldn’t go over well these days. Schmidt is too much of a womanizer (even if he reforms later in the series). If this show had a reboot, it would be called too “white feminist” by today’s standards. It’s not even an old show, but unless all the main cast became race-bent and made some variation of LGBT, it probably would be panned by Buzzfeed and Medium.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

All of them.

The only things that are better now are budgets and CGI, but CGI is still crap compared to properly executed practical effects, and budgets don't have to be big to make a good/profitable movie.