DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Fridge Raider]

And demand everyone give him thousands of dollars just because he's a 15 year streamer.

The energy is so low, and the begging is out of control.

Let's not forget he's done none of the work to set up his new run, so we're going to get "chat spends 30 minutes handholding old man through DLC he should have looked up on his own", then probably another "30 minutes of mod setup that he should have done on his own", then, finally, another 30 minutes of "set up his colony drop, which he again, should have done on his own"

Oh joy. More handholding for a game that's already pure handholding. And he's complaining about the price, what a broke begging bum.

 

[Fridge Raider]

No words needed.

 

[Dredd2022]

It still takes me like 8 seconds to process how flat the back of his head is.

 

[Mysterious Figure]

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No words needed.

He looks like an old Beavis and Butthead character.

 

[PhilTRAINWRECKdentedREAL]

He looks like an old Beavis and Butthead character.
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Phil is just Beavis that never found his Butthead. Or is Cat Fat Butthead working at Burger World. Hmmm

 

[Fridge Raider]

What's that moron? You don't think Phil is entertaining? He's a bad streamer? Well how about you check out THIS exciting content! Phil gets handheld through installing mods on Steam! Now this is some entertaining fucking content.

2:41

Right before this he got an anon $10 tip with a bunch of recommendations for mods to use and you will notice that DentOfTheVoid over in chat says "hey those are literally all the mods I emailed to you". What are the odds! I mean they are popular but this dude has like 5 loyal fans, come on. Clearly fake.

Now if you're calmed down from that rollercoaster watch him enable the mods in the menu! But I warn you, this content is not for the faint of heart, this is so exciting you may feel like you've just railed a line of coke then shotgunned a tallboy. That is normal, this is DSP, he's an 18 year vet, entertainment is his art and he is a master.

1:57

Why do his eyes move so much, how close is that fucking screen dude?

Jokes aside I think it is very telling that he immediately looks to chat. It's not new but he doesn't spend a single second trying to figure it out. The button is right there under his right moob, it's not like they hid it. Finds the button, eyes go immediately back to chat. Chat tells him what to do, it doesn't enable them all with one click, so he sits there making a funny face and waits for the next instructions. I seriously think the handholding in every facet of his life is doing way more damage than people realize, making decisions is like a muscle, you have to exercise it or it atrophies.

Also at about a minute thirty in listen to how scared he is. Like dude it's just mods it's not open heart surgery. It's unbelievable this man is 43, has been a gamer most of his life, has streamed/made videos for years, and is this bad at it. Holy shit man. This is why you're a lolcow Phil. There was no reason to waste your audience's time with this it took you 15 minutes you could've done this while the slideshow was running.

 

[Digger10]

Now this is some entertaining fucking content.

I'm assuming it wasn't a troll, but I liked hearing Phil say "Everyone says do 'Common Sense'."

 

[Fridge Raider]

It still takes me like 8 seconds to process how flat the back of his head is.

I'm always amazed by his posture. It's so bad. It is the posture of a thoroughly raped man (or a person that used to be a man and is now essentially just a sexless blob). Someone said "Phil makes a lot more sense if you just realize that he has become his mother" and I think of that all the time now.

 

[That Hedonist Nerd]

Also at about a minute thirty in listen to how scared he is. Like dude it's just mods it's not open heart surgery. It's unbelievable this man is 43, has been a gamer most of his life, has streamed/made videos for years, and is this bad at it. Holy shit man. This is why you're a lolcow Phil. There was no reason to waste your audience's time with this it took you 15 minutes you could've done this while the slideshow was running.

Deep inside my soul I sincerely hope that all of Dave's schtick is just an act. That long ago he realized that the best way to guarantee a certain level of income is to play the inept asshole that everyone will hate, which attracts those folks who always have to root for the small guy no matter how much it's caused by his own purposeful actions.

I mean, it won't be. But I still want to believe.

 

[thebigdream]

This Rimworld stream is unfathomable levels of dent. After starting a new run, he's already forgotten basic, essential concepts of the game like finding food, building lights, and organising storage, things he was already needing to do in his previous run... I haven't played Rimworld in years and know exactly how to do those things, among plenty of other parts of the game Phil has never even gotten to. His brain is fucking mush, he's a dementia patient.

My only solace is that he rolled pretty poorly with his random characters; normally having a Sanguophage would be pretty OP, but it means Phil will have to micromanage their needs which is a non-starter. He's going to cry when they need to deathrest. And having no colonist with good construction will make managing moods and resources frustrating.

 

[GibMoneyPls]

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No words needed.

He's not even leaving the house to get his haircut anymore. That's a classic Kat with a Flowbie cut.

 

[HorseWifeAppreciator]

He's not even leaving the house to get his haircut anymore. That's a classic Kat with a Flowbie cut.

Didn't think it was possible for Phil to find a way to leave the house even less then already does. The man is a true innovator when it comes to being lazy as fuck.

 

[Warblade]

I wanna see Phil play Space Station 13. It would probably take him a few months to figure out the UI for one server. He could play the janitor role but I doubt he's even qualified for that

 

[BPD Gunt Rider]

He looks like an old Beavis and Butthead character.
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And Phil's beard looks like theirs

 

[weliveinaMeritocracy]

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No words needed.

 

[Love Is Blue]

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No words needed.

head so flat it forms a 180 angle

 

[Martys_not_smarty]

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No words needed.

Looks like when you're in CAW mode in a WWE game and you take the face slider and put it all the way to the bottom.

 

[Twrx]

I wonder how gaming would be today if Phil never started on YouTube. The God of war devs put in yellow paint specifically because of him. Even used a stream clip of his at GDC.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Yeah, circumstantial evidence requires abstract thought to comprehend. Phil is incapable of abstract thinking.

I remember when LegalSydePhail made multiple prestreams about "muh circumstantial evidence" some time before the SideScrollers appearance to set the ground for why the WWE Champions shit isn't true. As a narcissist he of course thought that he's a super duper expert about subjects he learned about 10 seconds ago but as you may imagine he had (and still doesn't) no idea what the fuck circumstantial evidence is. He thinks it's some barely-linked bullshit evidence that requires multiple leaps of logic to have anything to do with the case. In reality, let's just give the most extreme example of circumstantial evidence - your gun with your fingerprints being found in the room with a dude who got shot to death. LegalSydePhail would of course say that the literal smoking gun is direct evidence when in reality direct evidence is limited to just recordings of the act or eyewitness testimony.

 

[dspsbiggestfan]

Guys, he totally beat the bored to death allegations on Sundays with rimworld. And you know what? His supporters LOVE these streams so much they gave 2 anon 50$ paypal tips. Take that trolls!! No more felted coffers stream!