DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Shoresy]

Once again, Phil makes livestreamfails

https://www.reddit.com/r/LivestreamFail/comments/1r7jc32/darksydephil_plays_the_virtual_boy_live/

I haven't visited Reddit in like 5 years because it's generally a shitheap, but the comments are a wonderful read. Here's my favourite so far:

I would gladly sit through the entirety of Snoop's abandoned livestream, than sit through half an hour with Phil's fat fuckin' mug shoved into Nintendo's gaping red plastic anus as he describes the gameplay about as eloquently as a National Geographic host with Down Syndrome and a hair lip who only got the job because they've also got terminal cancer and it's a Make a Wish thing.

Honorable mention, this fucking comment:

 

[johnkimble123]

His takes about these retro games on the switch online stuff are CRAZY. He really barely played any old games and is a total fake gamer

"Harvest moon? isnt this a farm sim game?" "Uncharted waters? whats that?" come on man

"Not that I would play Game Boy" uhhhh gameboy is fucking kino what the fuck

The only retro games he knows are ones he learned about in the early 2000s as cult classics, which is how his favorite SNES game list somehow has Chrono Trigger and Earthbound. He has to then LARP like he liked those games as a kid to show how real of a gamer he is.

 

[ZipDisk]

He really had no idea just how fucking stupid that idea was

Was this the King's plan all along? To act so retarded that he managed to catapult himself back into the limelight with pure bait?

The fields have become so dry, this becomes a deluge.

Personally, I don't get the desire to netflix your fucking retinas out but the announcment trailer almost got me, despite no interest in switch or virtual boy.

Like I knew the classics were shitty little SOC's, with very little merit on their own, but the snes classic had yoshi's island, and emulation always felt wrong.

Like I won't say the classic emulation is perfect, but it did "feel better" and it wasn't just nostalgia.

The switch being essentially "Yeah, but you get to pay EVERY MONTH" is a big part of why I never bought one.

 

[Crooked 16th]

Phil has created the worlds first audio gameplay walkthrough today and in 10 years when millionaires have been made from this he will still be at level one.

 

[JohnRedcorn]

Something that always sticks out to me watching him play sf6 is how after like 3 years he still plays exactly the same.

He still spams the same easy mode basic day one combos. You can literally go back and watch his gameplay from the first month of sf6 and it looks exactly the same as his gameplay now.

 

[INirvana]

Legit one of Phil's worst weeks, AND leaving off a SF6 lost

 

[The Paleblood Vessel]

"This is not a bad night, just that it hasn't been great for several streams now."
-Coffers at $100 now when yesterday's streams were $104 and $105.

 

[shekelshoah666]

Something that always sticks out to me watching him play sf6 is how after like 3 years he still plays exactly the same.

He still spams the same easy mode basic day one combos. You can literally go back and watch his gameplay from the first month of sf6 and it looks exactly the same as his gameplay now.

Watching him play another Lily and she is doing stuff even he has no idea she could do. Its just so hard to watch DSP clearly doesn't know how to play this game and playing casuals isn't going to help him at all.

The idea of playing any sort of multiplayer fighting game has just passed him by unless it's some old ass game he is unwilling to sniff the frame data or do anything besides basic day 1 bnb.

He is fucking begging his ass off tonight and mega OT/stalling too.

No coffers streak: 4 and this is deserved because his last 4 streams have been an all time low kahntent wise.

 

[Caliph of Abu Baka]

"This is not a bad night, just that it hasn't been great for several streams now."
-Coffers at $100 now when yesterday's streams were $104 and $105.

mega OT/stalling too.

A whopping 35 minutes OT garnered him literally zero dollars. Lol, lmao even.

Black Monday? More like Black Week. Incidentally it's also Black Month.

 

[neger psykolog]

Kiwibros....is OIC gone?

I didn't realize that the post in this thread predicting what would happen when OIC was gone would come to pass so soon. RYAN! HAAAAAAALPPPPP! Save the piggy!

Sending out the biggest pig signal for OIC to return. Snort.

DSP can't survive like this. He has Internet bills, electricity bills.

Tips help the most right now too, in case anybody wasn't aware.

 

[Generic Misc]

He is fucking begging his ass off tonight and mega OT/stalling too.

No coffers streak: 4 and this is deserved because his last 4 streams have been an all time low kahntent wise.

It makes me immensely smug that the whales hardly even bother saving the streams anymore.

1. It shows that when they were splashing the cash during and after the Kino Arc, they really couldn't afford it - otherwise they would have kept it up considering they are still around; and
2. His eagerness to treat the Asmon bump as permanent was a huge own goal (pun intended) - that arbitrary goal seemed to mean a lot to at least 5 random retards. He did away with one of his greatest tard-wragling tools and he can't bring them back without the dreaded 'detractor w'.

 

[Cardinal Cardinal]

Lots of good salt tonight. That and him saying pattern every other word.

Spoiler: Toxic rant into beg

Spoiler: Cammy double perfect

Spoiler: Cope session into cope sip

Spoiler: Dog water, pattern play, terrible human

 

[Ivan Daniloff]

Phil has created the worlds first audio gameplay walkthrough today and in 10 years when millionaires have been made from this he will still be at level one.

He has a such a warped and debased mind that he breaks through to innovation while neither trying nor being aware. A lesser example is all the puzzling game glitching. This, today? It’s something new. He will do nothing with it.

 

[GameratePTSD]

"Okaay, there seems to be some kind of uhh tribal native. Skin I would describe as peanut-butterish? Okay, I'm moving towards him. Okay, I can sprint with B. I'm sprinting towards him. Oh, if I press down on the D pad I can kneel, interesting. Okay, I'm kneeling. I wonder if I can do some sort of buttslam?"

 

[Gee Willows Wilson!]

We are at 4 missed goals. Can we finally get the 5th, or will there be a FIRE in the discord, alerting the dented whales they better show up or so help me god!

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

He'd likely pick the other outfit which isn't as "skimpy"

I don't think the burkini is available in FF7

The only retro games he knows are ones he learned about in the early 2000s as cult classics, which is how his favorite SNES game list somehow has Chrono Trigger and Earthbound. He has to then LARP like he liked those games as a kid to show how real of a gamer he is.

You're giving him way too much credit, he only ever lists JRPGs that everyone and their fucking mother has heard of, I don't like JRPGs and even I know about series like Breath of Fire, Legend of Mana, Ys, Legend of Heroes and many other that I don't think I've ever head Phail even mention. He only starts talking about how a game was one of his "childhood JRPGs" when he plays a remaster of it like he did with Suikoden, or Soy-Codeine as he pronounced it. "I WAS A HUGE FAN OF SOY-CODEINE BACK IN THE DAY, IT'S PART OF MY CHILDHOOD" "hey phail who is your favorite character" "UUUUUH I CAN'T NAME A SINGLE ONE DOOD! HUGE FAN THO!"

I played Suikoden ONE TIME 15 years ago and I still remembered Crowley and Peshmerga by name, not to mention that I remembered a lot of other characters by what they did or what weapons they had, like "elevator guy" for Sergei or "teleport girl" for Viki. Meanwhile the supposed "huge fan" Phail didn't remember a single thing about the game.

 

[Rudy Coleman]

I haven't visited Reddit in like 5 years because it's generally a shitheap, but the comments are a wonderful read. Here's my favourite so far:
Ver archivo adjunto 8576325
I would gladly sit through the entirety of Snoop's abandoned livestream, than sit through half an hour with Phil's fat fuckin' mug shoved into Nintendo's gaping red plastic anus as he describes the gameplay about as eloquently as a National Geographic host with Down Syndrome and a hair lip who only got the job because they've also got terminal cancer and it's a Make a Wish thing.

Honorable mention, this fucking comment:
Ver archivo adjunto 8576387

remember 15 years ago when james rolf figured this out?
dsp is an avgn lorelet

 

[thebigdream]

Lots of good salt tonight. That and him saying pattern every other word.

"Are you gonna support tonight or not?" There are actual street beggars with more tact than this, he's not even putting in the minimal effort to mask it anymore, he's just straight up demanding money from the dents. Surely we're approaching total narc death?

 

[neger psykolog]

Ver archivo adjunto 8575991

Almost half a million views in a couple hours, guess it's not just the reddit retards who think you're a clown, Phil. Welcome ... home.

I just realized this is basically the same as him doing the game unboxing where he doesn't even unbox it.

10/10

The writers of this show are amazing when they do subtle references to past seasons like this... Also all the gay imagery they put in the show is great too.

 

[DerelictOnion]

Please, Phil, stop. The unfortunate bastard who will do the worst DSP moments of 2026 will run out of disk space by April.