Personal Lolcows: Furry Edition - Only God Knows the Horror Lurking in this Fandom

[Vygode]

A respected lolcow is a contradiction in and of itself.

To be fair, people mourned at KingCobraJFS's death. A lolcow is someone to laugh at or milk for lulz, that includes people you may respect.

 

[Crispy Pancake]

Most Farmers don't wish death on cows unless theyre a zoosadist or paedo or murderer when it's hard to not get MATI.

 

[AnOminous]

A respected lolcow is a contradiction in and of itself.

It used to be a lot more common. Most lolcows being absolutely despicable people unworthy of any respect is a recent development.

To be fair, people mourned at KingCobraJFS's death. A lolcow is someone to laugh at or milk for lulz, that includes people you may respect.

Fedsmoker was also beloved. Terry Davis is almost viewed as a patron saint despite many lolcow traits.

 

[umekistao]

You're a degenerate.


How do you people handle real world problems? If your boss doesn't give you a raise are you people going to make a Google Doc on them?


Why is everyone in the furfag community like this?


Why are all of you niggers making call out posts over fucking shit talking?


Oh God it's double retarded.


Nigger what? You saw a child flirting with a woman so you tried... also flirting with the woman??? Huh???


OK yeah you kinda deserve this one.

What the hell was the point of this entire post?

at this point yeah,it was total retardation. if i kept quiet none of this should have happened.

 

[umekistao]

so i found out that this person is more worse than i thought. a person told me that he had a problem with this woman i told about back in 2013. but didn't mentioned which forum was. the more you know. would share prints for who's interested but it is in another language.
also,for who's curious,here is her twitter:
@labratkuma

 

[Fag Alert Major Fag Alert]

so i found out that this person is more worse than i thought. a person told me that he had a problem with this woman i told about back in 2013. but didn't mentioned which forum was. the more you know. would share prints for who's interested but it is in another language.
also,for who's curious,here is her twitter:
@labratkuma

Huh?

 

[Ultra Ping]

so i found out that this person is more worse than i thought. a person told me that he had a problem with this woman i told about back in 2013. but didn't mentioned which forum was. the more you know. would share prints for who's interested but it is in another language.
also,for who's curious,here is her twitter:
@labratkuma

I'm sorry for whatever learning disability you have that prevents you from proofreading your fucking posts.

 

[sex haver]

so i found out that this person is more worse than i thought. a person told me that he had a problem with this woman i told about back in 2013. but didn't mentioned which forum was. the more you know. would share prints for who's interested but it is in another language.
also,for who's curious,here is her twitter:
@labratkuma

What the fuck are you on about? Is this the artist you were talking about in your previous complete sperg out?

 

[umekistao]

Were you dropped or shaken as an infant

None of these

 

[umekistao]

Is this the artist you were talking about in your previous complete sperg out?

Yes

 

[umekistao]

I'm sorry for whatever learning disability you have that prevents you from proofreading your fucking posts.

Yeah,I have shame of reading my own posts. Now reading it again,this is very dumb. Sorry for my bad English or something that happened though.

 

[AnOminous]

Nice triple post, retard.

 

[CFC-12]

Yeah,I have shame of reading my own posts. Now reading it again,this is very dumb. Sorry for my bad English or something that happened though.

0:03

 

[neurotardvirgin]

Spoiler: Juno/Nero Backtracks

Porving Grounds Thread: https://kiwifarms.st/threads/juno-s...ns-mudd-dragon-mudd-mann-jinkuspinkus.198541/
Main/Original post: https://kiwifarms.st/threads/personal-lolcows-furry-edition.32847/page-54#post-16544532
[09/5/2023] Update #1: https://kiwifarms.st/threads/personal-lolcows-furry-edition.32847/page-55#post-16753687
[01/17/2024] Update #2: https://kiwifarms.st/threads/personal-lolcows-furry-edition.32847/page-56#post-17535498
[01/21/2024] Update #3: https://kiwifarms.st/threads/personal-lolcows-furry-edition.32847/post-17555794
[03/21/2024] Update #4: https://kiwifarms.st/threads/personal-lolcows-furry-edition.32847/page-59#post-18007671
[07/26/2024] Update #5: https://kiwifarms.net/threads/personal-lolcows-furry-edition.32847/post-18943379
Instagram #1: https:/[/www.instagram.com/carnalkearns/
Instagram #2: https://www.instagram.com/simiankearns/

Update: Juno/Nero has made a return to Barq as of months ago - under the handle of "MissyPissyMudd".

Yes, let us all hear it from "MissyPissyMudd", the vampiric floating disembodied head of that Bling kid from Johnny Test or whatever the fuck; shoving their Giggly Goonclown-tier kinks in everyone's faces - who is absolutely in the position to speak for the mental wellness of the opposing party. (Dude's got dat quasi-Pruane face going doe.)

Ah yes - Tapout. Is Juno wearing this out of spite of me? (Knowing firsthand from IRL convo that I hated Tapout macho douches/how my hometown was filled with that crap?) - or otherwise from digging my KF history for that post ranting about them? That and/or is it supposed to be like a setup for another one of those underhanded taunting gestures? (ie. wearing a clothing brand that is historically associated with toxic masculine macho bro-douches to deliberately throw people off in the midst of the Woke/MtF disguise - only to hide behind the plausible deniability of "oh but it's just Y2K/00's Older Brother Core - plenty of progressive LGBTQ+ folks of my age/gen are into it" - ala how that zoomer rapper Sematary wears that kind of stuff while writing pro-antifa lyrics.)

More screenshots from the timeframe after the last post:

(Screenshot dating from September 13th, 2024 - according to file details, via the secondary Instagram under Juno's "Puppy"'s name that's dedicated to clothing/threads):

(These upcoming two [according to telegram, posted on a telegram DM on November 8, 2024]. Actual date of the instagram post is unknown.)

Right. Recklessly spending & gorging on overpriced hypebeast/camera/collectable/Kink slop - only to e-beg & leech from the rest of the community in the end - and then posting garish, cinematic shit like this in the end:

(that is - if you're supposed to take those donation posts at face value. What if Juno/Nero is actually a spoiled, rich trustfund baby who is just trying to hide it w/ those e-beg posts through Puppy/Doggy? One other out there theory: Perhaps it could be some kind of "test" measure for using Puppy/Doggy for fraud?)

**To add, remember that "Freak Fest" line of photos that got deleted real quick after posting, from the August 23rd, 2024 post of this thread? Going by how weirdly implicative it is that the two Instagrams under "Puppy's" name is technically ran by Juno/Nero - it kind of comes off as some attempt at "tricking" me into posting that pup play mask (Juno/Nero tricking me into doing their own bidding. One personal theory behind the context of that photo is: it was possibly originally a blackmail piece that winded up being "reframed" to adapt to the whole situation of everything being revealed on KF. I don't know how to convey this exactly, but maybe someone here can "get" what I mean & attempt to further piece things up.)

That being said - yes, it was gravely stupid of me to -not- censor the Pup Mask on the original posting. I thankfully -at least- knew off the bat that I'm supposed to censor the unmasked face & personal info as it came up as a counteraction, but didn't do so on the hood (In my brain, I assumed that since it's "concealing" the face around the eyes, there's no need to do so, poor common sense. So I re-uploaded an edit of the pup hood + eyes being fully pixelated a while back. I will have to ask mods to replace the photo on the Furry Personal Army Thread with the edited version, as I can't do so past the edit timer set on that thread.)

(These two, from September 3, 2024 - shortly after the late august pup hood pictures.)

>"If the cops come, leave!"

What does that even mean/imply? Is that market thing just a front for something shady going on? Or is it just as simple as the pup play exhibitionism of the "event" (and running off if they get the cops called on them for it?) Or was Juno/Nero was anticipating that I'd go full Quixotian pants-on-head retarded commando to make a scene? (and subsequently - using that as a counterpoint against me?) Yeah - no, I'm not going to "stick my hands in the mud" as bad as you want me to.

(Assorted portions of said "clothing" instagram under Pup's name.)

But yeah - this whole entire thing is odd. You know how a Pimp/Somebody running under an alpha male script would "doll up" and "show off" their subject at hand ala a trophy? It wouldn't surprise me if that "rabbid threads" instagram was something like that but disguised as some "le wholesome thriftshit" thing? And some other shit - I don't really know how to explain about what's speculatively going on with this instagram page beyond this.

This -suspiciously- really feels like another creepy implicative "wink wink, nudge nudge" assigned by Juno/Nero. Recap/Recall to the Donovan Sharpe "training a girl like a puppy" shit above.

Also - another fucking weird thing: this photo (according to the filetag) being dated from June 26th, 2020 - from my lease room in the house. That sign was given to me from Juno/Nero - I initially just assumed that Juno/Nero was just being funny/jocular without anything ulterior behind the phrase on it. But come to think - was that one of those weird "underhanded" gestures implicating what they intended to do to me (if Juno/Nero successfully managed to Groom me? That they wanted me to uhhh...) Or was that an attempt at leaving that in my room as a way to potentially "frame" me as a creep later on?

I also spotted this on the Facebook of "puppy" some while back...DevilDog Training - makes me wonder if Juno/Nero spontaneously "built" off of that from "Puppy's" FB likes as an idea for the Donovan Sharpe & PupPlay shit?

 

[Up1oading]

faking your own death Debunked


Yes, this appears to be a fake or fabricated document. Here's why, based on a detailed analysis of the image and cross-referenced with official processes for Minnesota death certificates:Key Indicators of Forgery

• State Seals and Notarization: The document prominently features a Minnesota state seal (e.g., "STATE OF MINNESOTA" and "HENNEPIN COUNTY" references from the prior page context) alongside a Virginia notary seal ("VIRGINIA COMMISSION" and "NOTARY PUBLIC" with an expiration date). Official Minnesota death certificates are issued and certified by the Minnesota Department of Health (MDH) or county vital records offices like Hennepin County's. While applications for copies can be notarized remotely (including out-of-state via mail or e-notary), the certificate itself must bear Minnesota-issued authentication, not a foreign state's notary stamp as the primary seal. Mixing seals like this is not standard and suggests tampering or a mockup.
• Handwritten Dates and Inconsistencies: The notary commission expiration is handwritten as "1/31/2024" (or similar, based on the image), while other dates like "10/20/23" appear nearby. Minnesota notaries are commissioned by the Minnesota Secretary of State, and their seals must include the exact commission details without ad-hoc handwriting. The "2023" date predates the death (March 25, 2025), which could imply backdating for forgery. Additionally, the faint "2025" and "2023" overlaps look like edits or layers from digital manipulation.
• Non-Standard Formatting and Seals: Minnesota death certificates use a specific, standardized layout from MDH forms, with raised or embossed seals, barcodes, and security features (e.g., watermarks or microprinting) to prevent counterfeiting. The seals here appear flat and pixelated, with irregular borders (e.g., the Virginia seal's wavy edges don't match official embossed designs). The "CARDIOMEGALY" stamp (likely "cardiomegaly," meaning enlarged heart) is oddly placed and not integrated like an official medical endorsement.
• [ No Verifiable Record Exists: A search of public death indexes (e.g., MDH's online verification tool for 1997–present and Minnesota Historical Society's records up to 2001) yields no matches for "Paige Bakey" dying on March 25, 2025, in Hennepin County or elsewhere in Minnesota. Broader web searches for obituaries, news of accidents, or related incidents return zero results for this individual and event. If real, at least a basic obituary or news mention would likely exist by now (September 24, 2025).

Official Minnesota Process for ContextFor comparison, here's how a legitimate certified Minnesota death certificate is handled:

Issuance	By MDH or county (e.g., Hennepin) after registration; includes cause/manner if available.	Lacks MDH certification number or barcode; autopsy details seem appended informally.
Notarization	Required for requests (e.g., to prove identity/eligibility); can be any U.S. notary, but not on the certificate itself.	Virginia notary dominates, implying the whole doc was notarized as an application, not a final cert.
Seals/Authentication	Minnesota state seal only; e-notary OK since 2020, but must comply with MN rules.	Dual-state seals; no MN-issued authentication.
Availability	Public index searchable online; certified copies cost $13–$20.	No public trace; matches editable "fake" templates online.

Likely Origin:

This resembles printable "fake death certificate" templates available online (e.g., for pranks, props, or educational use), which often include customizable fields for names, dates, and seals. The prior page you shared (with the autopsy details) has similar low-res formatting, suggesting both are from the same fabricated set—possibly edited in software like Photoshop.If this is meant to be humorous, theatrical, or a hoax, it's well-crafted but ultimately detectable. For real verification, contact Hennepin County Vital Records (hennepin.us) or MDH directly with the details. If you have more context or the full document, I can dig deeper!

 

[The Lаughing Man]

Stereotypical neckbeard unboxes and puts on his fursuit then reveals it to his mother. The channel has a lot of videos from furry conventions in Australia.

 

[Fag Alert Major Fag Alert]

So, somehow, Hobbies are dead?

 

[Trilby]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=uUslVU_3HEcSo, somehow, Hobbies are dead?

I guess we lost our idea of Leisure.

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