🎨 Artcow Ellen Woodbury / Pizzacake / Pizzacakecomic - A 40 year old webcomic artist, mother, porn star, misandrist, dramacow and Reddit celebrity. Threatens to sue her critics and cuckolds her husband. Female Andrew Dobson.

[FroonHRTSlammer]

⇓FAIR USE CRITICISM SECTION ⇓

She has to be fucking trolling there's no way she's this retarded. HAS SHE NOT WATCHED A SINGLE MOVIE WHERE A GUY USES A SHOTGUN?

 

[Local User]

We have a brand new epically funny pizzacake comic guys

https://www.threads.com/@pizzacakecomic/post/DJ6raebR-lj

https://ghostarchive.org/archive/2F1G9

From what I can see, you first have to place the ""Shotgun"" on your shoulder, grab the non-exist handle with one of your hands and grab the pump.

How would you even load this thing or cycle a new round in after firing a shot? Do you slide the pump upwards then down? Is it even a pump? What is this mess? I can't focus on the political messaging with that firearm monstrosity on the last page.

 

[Slimpacks]

Did you know that Ellen drew art for a band? Meet Despite the Virus. The music isn't even half bad

I'm pretty sure that's her husband's band.
On her archived website, she says that her husband Jeff loves playing guitar


The 'warm' soundtrack you posted is uploaded to a channel called "Jeffypop101" (Youtube / A / Preservetube)
In the comments, there is Ellen herself!

In the description, the author refers to himself as Jeff:

Spoiler: Description

This track was recorded around the same time as Party Girl, but we couldn't release it as there were problems with the levels on the master that we couldn't correct at the time. I had forgotten about this song, when I came across it in our archives, and decided to fix the levels. The artwork is the original from 10 or so years ago. Hope you enjoy it! Jeff

He has a playlist named "Favorites" with a bunch of music as well a video (Preservetube) named "Love" which is a slideshow of photos of him with Ellen together

The uploader of this video is Ellen's second channel (A), her avatar kinda looks like her current style here

On the other channel of the band (Don't know how to archive the comments) she says she wrote the "Party girl" song

On band's facebook there's a video of him playing guitar (A), he also says "Ellen and I wrote this song" in the beginning

Spoiler: Local archive

3:20

 

[Polentic]

"puppymafia" - proto Ellen Reddit account
Its nothing too noteworthy, just a bunch of cookie-cutter ramblings from a 25y/o on the internet in 2012. Most posts link to offsite image hosts or "meme creators", these links have since mostly expired.

The account isn't anything interesting. It's banned.

Email is woodbury_e@hotmail.com

Member of r/athiesm. Oooh how edgy.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

The account isn't anything interesting. It's banned.
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Email is woodbury_e@hotmail.com
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Member of r/athiesm. Oooh how edgy.

Could you please archive this? I want to read more.

 

[lIllllIiiiiLLLLiiiiIIIIll]

We have a brand new epically funny pizzacake comic guys

⇓FAIR USE CRITICISM SECTION ⇓
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Do you even know what a gun is? Have you ever seen a gun being used? How could you fuck up drawing a shotgun this much? I know you are a canuck but come the fuck on you could have found a proper reference for this within seconds on google. Just fucking lazy and shitty like all of these comics.

⇑FAIR USE CRITICISM SECTION ⇑

Tell us again why Canada isn't just the 51st state, you US-obsessed bimbo? It kind of feels like there's literally nothing in your own "country" worth talking about.

 

[Birthday Cat]

 

[Slimpacks]

u/puppymafia account contains the deepest darkest lore of PizzaCake
Reddit post (A)

Spoiler: the lore

Well, where do I start...
When I was 19, I allowed my ex-boyfriend to beat me senseless, to verbally assault me and manipulate my mind and take advantage of my low self-worth so that he could isolate me from every single person I loved until I was left with only him. He ruined my credit, stole everything I owned, cheated on me and got me fired. He gave me a concusion one night, which turned into a condition that caused me to have seizures and prevented me from driving for 4 years.
After we broke up I was completely alone. I used to get high every single day. I couldn't function without weed. I used to drink every night. I couldn't sleep without booze.
I ended up living in a boarding/crack house and, after almost getting stabbed one night, I eventually became homeless. I lived under a bridge during the winter and almost starved to death.
I wanted to die. I think I may have tried one night during an 8-day binge. I can't even remember what happened. No job, no car, no money, no home, no one in my life. Just nothingness.
Then I did something that changed my life and to this day, I don't know why I didn't do it before...I called my Mom from a payphone and just cried and cried and cried and didn't say a word. She just said "You can come home, I want you to come home. I love you."
It's been 5 years since then and here's what my life looks like now:
I have an amazing man who loves me, who's helped me build myself back up, who's built a life with me. He loves me for who I am and I love him.
We have a gorgeous 9-month-old angel baby daughter. She's the best part of my life and I can't imagine her not existing, I can't even describe how much better she makes the world for me.
I got a job that I enjoy and have been promoted three times. They gave me a blackberry, laptop, company creditcard and a pretty decent salary considering I have no post-secondary education. I have my own place, two sweet fur babies and am building my credit back up.
This year, I enrolled in college to pursue my true passion and so far I'm 6 weeks ahead of schedule with an average of 97%.
Life can change and it does all the time, you do have control. I know that darkness, but you must overcome it or you will die. Take it one step at a time and I promise you things will get better.

I guess the domestic abuse comic she posted previously is referring to this.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

Ellen confirmed.

 

[Pepe Cortisona]

Do you even know what a gun is? Have you ever seen a gun being used? How could you fuck up drawing a shotgun this much? I know you are a canuck but come the fuck on you could have found a proper reference for this within seconds on google. Just fucking lazy and shitty like all of these comics.

You see Bruno, when you hold shötgun like rifle, you'll never shoot to the inaccurate, because pellets become kalashnikov boolets

 

[DYLAN ‘DIELAWN’ VOLK]

the deepest darkest lore of PizzaCake

What do the redditards say? r/ThatHappened?

 

[Luke’s Missing Hand]

The account isn't anything interesting. It's banned.
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Email is woodbury_e@hotmail.com
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Member of r/athiesm. Oooh how edgy.

As well as leftist cesspits like r/pics r/politics and r/adviceanimals as well.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

I feel sad reading some of this.
Ellen won't take her advice:

Ellen's dad died when she was a teen:

Ellen reflects.



Ellen lies about her height.

Ellen's weight, if we can trust her.

Ellen didn't like birth control.
Exaggeration? Maybe she had braces.
Edit: Ellen can't drive because she gets seizures. Allegedly caused by her abusive ex-boyfriend.

 

[Cheesy Beavy]

Ellen won't take her advice:

The irony is rich.

 

[Hey Johnny Bravo]

New art, and Ellen thinks going to the US is as dangerous as being a woman in Saudi Arabia.
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Ellen, you are white. You're a SJW, and you're silencing actual citizen's voices.

Don't come to Texas if you're black, or you'll hear the n-word. It's safe here.

Edit: No one gives a shit if you're Canadian. You're acting like you'll be arrested if you come over here.

I actually like the speech bubble gag in this one.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

Knowing Ellen can't drive makes her post where she raged about the school wanting her to become her son's wrangler makes more sense.

She'd have to walk to and from his school or get a taxi. I don't know if Canada has the same zoning policy as the US. If so, her kid's school could be very far away.

 

[Cheesy Beavy]

Knowing Ellen can't drive

Am I a blind retard? Where was this proven or stated?

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

Am I a blind retard? Where was this proven or stated?

@Slimpacks screenshotted the post where she talks about being abused.

Okay only four years. I'm still skeptical about that part. Seizures are serious and I don't see how she was cured of it. I'm pretty ignorant in this regard. Will the right combination of meds cure her for good?

I personally think she's too autistic to drive.

 

[Cheesy Beavy]

@Slimpacks screenshotted the post where she talks about being abused.
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Okay only four years. I'm still skeptical about that part. Seizures are serious and I don't see how she was cured of it. I'm pretty ignorant in this regard. Will the right combination of meds cure her for good?

I personally think she's too autistic to drive.

Ok, I’m a blind retard. Honestly skimmed that post. If it’s anything like other laws I’ve heard of, after so many years of no seizures (roughly 4-5) you can drive again. I highly doubt she still has seizures as I’m sure if she did she’d be bringing it up all the time. If she still doesn’t drive then it’s most likely laziness and lack of interest in driving.

 

[EllenDrawsRapeOfHerHaters]

If this is true Ellen is genuinely schizophrenic.

Ellen's dad choked to death when she was 10.

Ellen doesn't want to drive.


Edit: Archive of Ellen's demon story (first picture in this post)

https://archive.is/EFr6I