Why is furry erp so lame?

[Staticness]

God damn, the prose is beige.

 

[Daddy's Angry Juice]

Well it's much harder to find someone that you'd want to fuck.
It's easy with other ERP discords because you just have to ask "are you a 12 year old girl and/or boy? ". With furry ERP you have like a thousand different questions afterwards, like "are you some kind of bird?" "Do you believe in interspecies breeding?" "Where do I put my penis?"
It's just a mess.

 

[dick brain]

Roleplay, erotic or otherwise,is the event horizon of autism. I used to think it was making OCs, but that's just a symptom of roleplaying; the root cause of furries, trannies, pooners, vtubers, """femboys""" etc is roleplay, it weakens the degree to which one identifies with their body and life and self, and instead supplants it with an imagined identity -- an anthropomorphic animal or anime girl, for example. """Dysphoria""" is simply the disconnect between the real and imagined selves. Stigmatize roleplay, bully roleplayers.

 

[We Are The Witches]

I don't know since I've never read it.

I assume most "ERP"s are bad since the entire plot must be like the "story" in a porno movie, people don't watch it for that, but to indulge in their horniness, so it can be as brainless as you'd imagine.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Too many OCs.

If you're roleplaying as two characters from a known media property fucking, you have three movies or six novels or a TV series' worth of background material, known to both writers. Either writer knows enough about both characters to know what will work well, what notes to hit. If both writers have watched the same hours of cutscenes, Writer A can say "he moved his hands against the flat planes of Y's stomach, wondering what suffering was now only in the mute form of rad scars," because they know the character's history and that Writer B, playing that character, can pick up from there.

If a furry has written background for their OC that's more than just a reference sheet with a magnified genital inset and a list of bullet points about how they like licorice and hate preps, they're in an awkward position. Either they have to assign reading to the other person they want to cyber with, as homework that must be completed before they yiff, or they have to try to one-sidedly shoehorn their character's motivations and backstory into the keyboard-smashing. And that written background is either going to be really long, or it's going to be egregiously tell-not-show in order to fit in the prospective ERP partner's attention span.

The opposite case is furry space-filling ERP, where the same people who loiter around an IRC/Discord channel treat their characters as "them" and half-ass a "/me glomps SparkleTush" any time someone joins, turning it into long, boring furry PDA in the main channel.

 

[Space_Dandy]

Furries are a bunch of autistic virgins. That's not a stereotype, it's almost a requirement. Also usually terminally online, and usually zoomers.

Autists are poor writers, they indulge their fixations, unable to appeal to others.

You can tell when a virgin writes about sex. It's not that every writing has to be 100% realistic, but there's certain unnecessary mistakes or odd choices that alienate those in the real world.

Terminally online nolifers are also poor writers. Little varied life exposure, lack of realism.

Teens and angsty college kids living in mom's basement make for insufferable writers.

 

[Mad At The Intranet]

Because wanting to have sex with animals is lame and nasty

 

[Laburnum]

The days of 'I put on my robe and wizard hat' are long behind us I'm sorry to say.

 

[dick brain]

"he moved his hands against the flat planes of Y's stomach, wondering what suffering was now only in the mute form of rad scars,"

"I skateboarded off a truck into a fire hydrant."

 

[Aunt Carol]

"I skateboarded off a truck into a fire hydrant."

I was thinking more, "hmmm, I carved it in there myself. It's a homage to my mentor/lover's scar, but also? It hides a flexible saw blade in the raised tissue."
"Aw, you knew I was going to give you shit about engravings not having a tactical advantage. Well played, American. Now why don't you show me what she taught you about close-quarters cuddling?"

See, because both hypothetical writers know the whole canon of both characters, they can set each other up for a later/shared payoff.

 

[Rozzy]

The leaked Furry ERP DMs, I have never laughed so much at the drama and seething.

 

[dick brain]

I was thinking more, "hmmm, I carved it in there myself. It's a homage to my mentor/lover's scar, but also? It hides a flexible saw blade in the raised tissue."
"Aw, you knew I was going to give you shit about engravings not having a tactical advantage. Well played, American. Now why don't you show me what she taught you about close-quarters cuddling?"

See, because both hypothetical writers know the whole canon of both characters, they can set each other up for a later/shared payoff.

I like mine better.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

Furries often work in technical fields. Ever seen purple prose from a programmer?

 

[Glowie]

The leaked Furry ERP DMs, I have never laughed so much at the drama and seething.

Said furfag before seething at users laughing at porn addicted dog fuckers

Self awareness is non existent here.

 

[Tenshi Eating A Corn Dog!]

I was thinking more, "hmmm, I carved it in there myself. It's a homage to my mentor/lover's scar, but also? It hides a flexible saw blade in the raised tissue."
"Aw, you knew I was going to give you shit about engravings not having a tactical advantage. Well played, American. Now why don't you show me what she taught you about close-quarters cuddling?"

See, because both hypothetical writers know the whole canon of both characters, they can set each other up for a later/shared payoff.

You speak on the subject with a worrying amount of authority. I'm inclined to say you just write in your free time, but a part of me is troubled by what type of writing it might be.