How Taylor Swift captured modern dating despair

1713614679770.png

For two female journalists in their 30s - who also happen to be massive Swifties - there's a lot about Taylor Swift's new album that rings true.

From exes who strung us along, to comfort-eating after a breakup. We've all been there, and pop's biggest superstar has too.

Swift is no stranger to writing about personal subject matters. And she's also by no means the first musician to sing about heartbreak, pain and sorrow.

But in The Tortured Poets Department, Swift pinpoints the unique 21st Century anxieties that so many of us millennials have experienced when dating.

Perhaps more than any other song on her new album, So Long, London is the real sucker punch.

"I'm pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free," she laments, in a track widely thought to be about her ex-partner, Joe Alwyn.

This feels like a pivotal moment in the album. A moment so raw, that you're stopped in your tracks.

It doesn't matter that Swift is a world-famous musician, with A-list friends and a massive billion-dollar fortune. Beneath all of that, she's a 34-year-old woman, who understands all too well the anxieties about running out of time to find "The One", settle down and start a family.

Rebecca Reid, a Swiftie in her early 30s, told BBC News it felt like The Tortured Poets Department could have been written for her in mind.

"With So Long, London, but honestly, almost every single song, there's so much on there about the idea that you gave somebody your youth and that you can't get that back," she said.

"And that's definitely a feeling that I really resonate with."

In another song, Take Down Bad, Swift sings: "Now I'm down bad, crying at the gym."

Again, these are lyrics that strike a chord for many. Who hasn't experienced the depression of a breakup, which leaves you in tears as you try to go about your everyday routine?

Other lyrics see her too depressed to get out of bed, while in Manuscripts, Swift writes about comfort-eating children's cereal (which cereal, we found ourselves wondering).

For Saira Thwaites, who's almost 30 and a committed Swiftie, the more she listens to the tracks, the more she can relate to them.

"Her stories are so specific, and they really sum up the numbness and emptiness of a breakup," she says.

Even when Swift's on stage, surrounded by adoring fans during her Eras tour - a tour so successful that it's made her a billionaire - her grief remains in place.

"Breaking down, I hit the floor / All the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting, 'More'," she sings on the deceitfully upbeat I Can Do It With A Broken Heart.

'Swift still experiences dating despair'

"[The song] is about telling everybody you're fine and being creative and pushing through when you're not really giving yourself the space to heal or to grieve, that you need this," Reid says.

"Again, that's something that I can really resonate with because I spent the early period of my break-up single parenting, and going on TV and radio and writing books and telling everybody how great I was and how happy I was when I was, in fact, processing one of the worst traumas of my life."

Helen Brown, a music critic at The Independent, says "a whole generation of women" have found Swift's songs to be the soundtrack to their lives.

"Singing of the elusive lure of rings and cradles, Swift articulates the challenges facing a generation who are marrying and having children on average five years later than in the 1990s," she tells BBC News.

"It's equally reassuring and alarming to think that even without the financial challenges facing most people her age, Swift still experiences the dating despair of her peers.

"Like them she sounds overwhelmed by the options and describes being ghosted as she asks herself if she expects too much, or too little of herself and her partners."

In telling the story of modern dating, Swift has never held back in writing about her exes.

Many are reading her latest album as a dig in particular at Alwyn and the 1975's Matty Healy while also touching on her current sweetheart, NFL superstar Travis Kelce.

Her intentions are laid bare from the sleeve notes for the album, in which she says: "A smirk creeps onto this poet's face. Because it's the worst men that I write best."

Swift and Alwyn, an actor, split up in April 2023. When she later announced the arrival of a new album, fans immediately began to speculate it would deal with the fall-out.

Her choice of album title echoed a WhatsApp group chat that Alwyn and Normal People star Paul Mescal had, called The Tortured Man Club, adding to the speculation.

In So Long, London, she hints at wedding plans, singing: "You swore that you loved me, but where were the clues, I died on the altar waiting for the proof."

She also revealed she was upset at having to leave London, where she'd lived with Alwyn - adding that she'd "loved" the city.

Another track, But Daddy I Love Him, is also thought to address the discourse that surrounded Swift's reported-but-never-confirmed romance with The 1975's lead singer Healy, last year.

Some fans felt let down by the relationship, saying that Healy - who has faced accusations of misogyny and racism in his career (all of which he denies) - was an inappropriate choice of partner.

In her song, Swift hits back, declaring: "I'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning / I'll tell you something about my good name, it's mine alone to disgrace."

But is humiliating your exes in public the right thing to do? Brown says it is "a complicated issue".

"Swift doesn't name anybody in these songs and her real history has always been braided with fiction. She's a storyteller, coming from a country music tradition which has a long history of female stars calling out bad behaviour from men," she says.

"I'd add that while Swift may take swipes at her exes, she always holds herself to account. As both the exes she appears to be addressing on this record are also songwriters, they've got a right to reply in their own work and I suspect they both think all's fair in love and lyrics."

The BBC has reached out to both Alywn - who did not respond - and Healy, who wasn't available for comment.

So where does all of that leave Swift's current very public relationship with Kelce?

'Love makes Taylor behave like a kid'

Nona Uppal, another dedicated Swiftie, tells the BBC that while a lot of The Tortured Poets Department is about despair and heartbreak, it also nods to the happiness Swift feels in a new relationship, which is also something that many people can identify with.

She points to the song So High School, which she interprets as being about Kelce as it is "all about butterflies and doing the things that kids would do in watching movies with your friends".

"I think it just captures a whole spectrum of human emotion where love makes Taylor behave like a kid. And that to her is what love is all about," she says.

"And I just love the level of vulnerability that captures, because I think that's something I relate to pretty heavily."

BBC News
Archive [April 20 2024]
 
Swift and Drake are two sides of the same coin. 100% astroturfed lab created. All of their "beats", lyrics, fashion sense, the way they speak, the people they date, their entire existence is a show put on by committee to make as much money as possible, and the general public is dumb enough to eat it up.
 
I don't know if there's ever been an artist who has seemed more like a "product" than Taylor Swift. I hate that we're all going to be in endless Taylor Swift and Beyonce entertainment news cycles for the rest of our lives.

At least there's this insight:

taylor swift 400 songs about niggas.jpg
 
She's worth $1bil. If she wants children she can just have some babies with that six foot five athlete she's dating and not worry about the long term, because those kids are going to be raised by an army of nannies anyway. Or she could even throw her life into a family and become a full time stay at home mum if she's genuinely broody, because she's worth $1bil and never has to worry what would happen if she's left holding the baby.
Yes, but there's a problem. The guy. Any man she goes for is going to nope out as soon as he catches wind of being a baby daddy. She might be worth a billion, but you're crazy if you think her lawyers wouldn't pursue him for child support/alimony if he decided to dip after she got pregnant. Most men in Hollywood either know this, or their lawyers know this.
 
Yes, but there's a problem. The guy. Any man she goes for is going to nope out as soon as he catches wind of being a baby daddy. She might be worth a billion, but you're crazy if you think her lawyers wouldn't pursue him for child support/alimony if he decided to dip after she got pregnant. Most men in Hollywood either know this, or their lawyers know this.
I don't think that's really a major factor. It's not so much the men as it is her, or, her unique position in the world. She may be on the wrong side of 30 now, but she's still on top of the world and should be at least until the end of the decade. She's a victim (I use the term extremely loosely) of having virtually unlimited choices when it comes to everything in life, including men.

The men that are baby daddy potential for her are going to all, with zero exceptions, range from very rich to Made-a-deal-with-Moloch rich. I don't think they're going to be all that concerned with child support payments, but rather with locking down what's considered to be a woman that's one of the most sought after people in modern history. They'd likely be concerned about getting shot by one of her more insane fans if/when a breakup occurred more than anything involving money.

I think that she's ultimately going to go down the Jennifer Aniston path, except more famous and without the sympathetic angle of getting left for another A-list famous woman by her A-list famous boyfriend.
 
What do you get when you kiss a guy?
You get enough germs to catch pneumonia
After you do, he'll never phone ya


Dumb pop songs written by old Jewish guys and sung by whatever pretty/exotic young thing had pipes used to at least be funny.
 
That being said, Matt Healy's appearance on The Adam Friedland show has to be one of the few good episodes. He added a lot to the jokes about (((them))) and other races. It's funny that the album is about that dude because the football guy relationship is obviously on a contractual basis and the breakup date is a matter of law. It's just to rehabilitate her image after the evil antisemitic racist.
If you believe in multiple universe theory there's a universe where she went on the podcast after Matty to clear things up and ugly-laughed at all of Nick's Chinese guy impressions. I really really wanna live in the universe where Taylor Swift's snorting laugh almost drowns out the Korean Dan Schneider bit.
 
There's also:

"We could pick a decade /
we wished we could live instead of here /
I'd say the 1830's without all the racists" (I hate it here)

"So go and tell your friends that I’m obsessive and crazy / That’s fine I’ll tell mine that you’re gay!" (Picture to Burn)

"Cause you were Romeo – I was a scarlet letter” (Love story)

"All you are is mean / And a liar, and pathetic, and alone in life / And mean, and mean, and mean, and mean" (Mean).

And my favorite:

"Cory’s eyes are like a jungle / He smiles, it’s like the radio" (Stay beautiful)
I want $current_year with more open racists.

If you believe in multiple universe theory there's a universe where she went on the podcast after Matty to clear things up and ugly-laughed at all of Nick's Chinese guy impressions. I really really wanna live in the universe where Taylor Swift's snorting laugh almost drowns out the Korean Dan Schneider bit.
MORTY! MORTY! MORTYYYYYY! WE'RE GOING TO THE DIMENSION WITH BASED TAYLOR SWIFT!
 
Deathmatch between:
  • Current day Swifty
  • Height of popularity Undertale fan
  • Height of popularity Brony
Who wins?
 
If you want an accurate image of current year dating trends, there is an AI image of Taylor Swift getting banged by Grouch from Sesame Street on top of a pile of garbage.
Is this the image your talking about? Unfortunately, I couln't find the uncensored version.
1000004903.jpg

Edit: Found the uncensored version
Oscar Swift.jpg
 
Última edición:
Swift and Drake are two sides of the same coin. 100% astroturfed lab created. All of their "beats", lyrics, fashion sense, the way they speak, the people they date, their entire existence is a show put on by committee to make as much money as possible, and the general public is dumb enough to eat it up.
I couldn't have said it better myself

Occasionally Taylor herself seems surprised by all the publicity they have planned for her.
 
People who are all about this need to fuck off and die. Rich, white, pretty billionaire is not the same as most other women.

See, most other women who want access to the top 5% of men they seem to all be chasing don't have access to them.

This woman has access to not only the top 5%, she has access to the top 0.00001%. She might have her pick but for the fact that she has a long-standing reputation for outing her exes in her music, and I'm sure most of those guys really don't want that kind of spotlight shone on them because of her fucking fanbase.

Kelce enjoys it because he wants the fame and probably has made bank on Swifties buying up his merchandise like the fucking psychos they are. Meanwhile, Swift gets to have her retch-inducing head-cheerleader fantasy play out in front of the whole world against all of our fucking wills.

If someone can tell me how that's on the pulse of modern dating despair, I'm all ears but I guarantee, what you will be saying will probably sound like some unholy combination of farting, vomiting, and whatever people are now insisting is "poetry" because Swift calls herself a poet, and therefore, it must be true.

Eat your heart out, Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings.
 
Gee I wonder why Taylor Swift experience “dating despair”?!

Could it be because she’s a mediocre 7, obsessed with her career?

(As another Farmer said: Taylor Swift is what ugly women think attractive women look like.)

Could it be because there is a whole ocean of women you can date without a simultaneously dating TaylorSwift Inc., and on top are more attractive than her?

As for these chicks in their 30ies who idolize her, who the F wants to date a mediocre looking, stronk wahmen, who wasted her 20ies riding dicks or “focusing on her career”, and as a consequence feels the clock ticking, and demands a ring within a handful of dates?

It’s not a mystery who men want to date and marry. Men like nurturing women, women who aren’t dominant or nag and want control 24-7. Men like women who don’t prioritize themselves or their career over home and relationship and partner. Men like women who make them feel masculine and appreciated.

If you really can’t find a man, chances are that YOU are the problem, and aren’t offering anything that men are interested in.
 
Yes, but there's a problem. The guy. Any man she goes for is going to nope out as soon as he catches wind of being a baby daddy. She might be worth a billion, but you're crazy if you think her lawyers wouldn't pursue him for child support/alimony if he decided to dip after she got pregnant. Most men in Hollywood either know this, or their lawyers know this.
Swift lore:
John Mayer got her pregnant when they were dating many many moons ago.
Taylor is surprised but happy.
Mayer no want be baby daddy though, Mayer want fetus deletus.
Mayer gave her the old "it's not the right time, your career, soon baby soon" blah blah.
Taylor's dad and management also put heavy pressure on.
Taylor gets a termination and is depressed.
Mayer instantly dumps her once he's sure fetus was deletus.
(This is why Taylor hates Mayer, shades him constantly, and all the Swifties also hate him)
Taylor has been seriously in her feelings about potential motherhood ever since, and is absolutely not inclined to get pregnant again unless she is double sure the father is not going to run for the hills.
Taylor nearly went for it with Calvin Harris, but her dealbreaker was that he had to quit his career and be a stay at home dad.
Harris was okay with this for some of the year, but he also makes 50 mil a year to play records, so he figured Taylor could look after the baby some of the time so he could work.
No dice and she dumped him.
Alwyn was the same issue.
 
If you really can’t find a man, chances are that YOU are the problem, and aren’t offering anything that men are interested in.
Right, because men are never the problem.

I could write full essays on how culturally, we're all kind of fucked, but I don't have time for that.

That said, I'm noticed trends in men lately that indicate men have no interest in settling down, not because of any particular woman, but because they don't have to settle for any woman at all, no matter how much she has to "offer" a man.

This has nothing to do with Taylor Swift, of course. As I said before, she's not a typical woman, but telling women that if they can't find a man, it's 100% on them is basically sticking your head in the sand.
 
Atrás
Top Abajo