💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Falcon Sebben]

I have never seen a grown man continuously make as many intentional soy faces as Jack Russell Scalfani. It's like he legitimately cannot stop himself.

He's advertising to all the other faggots on Facebook and Instagram that he sucks dick.

For being a middle America QTard, Jack actually has strong bugman genes. He's done lots of tech stuff on his channels, even including video game streams, and I'm sure his disdain towards urban limousine liberal "Californians" is actually envy.

Well there were too many faggots in California where he was and too many darkies. So he went to Hendersonville because he didn't want Jr to be influenced by either one.

He didn't do a very good job after all Jagoff Jr likes little boys, uses his wife as a beard and worships niggos because of his rap "career". One of the viewers on his first video actually said, unironically, "why do you have to try to sound like a black man. You're better than that" or something to that effect. In other words the crossover between his Christian rap "career" and the people who watch his father unironically are racist asshats.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

I have never seen a grown man continuously make as many intentional soy faces as Jack Russell Scalfani. It's like he legitimately cannot stop himself.

Maybe that's how he normally opens his mouth given the way he shoves food into it.

 

[EatBeforeYouEat]

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Those shoulders are hilariously scrawny. I think its clear that Big T has more "T " than Jack.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Those shoulders are hilariously scrawny. I think its clear that Big T has more "T " than Jack.

It's one part that and one part that he probably wears a size XXXXXXL meaning the shoulders for that thing are down around where his biceps would be if he had any. It gives the illusion that his shoulders are less apparent than they normally are.

 

[captkrisma]

"Hey honey, I know you just had a pretty nasty health scare, but I know what will make you feel better! A vacation roughly 10 hours away from home! We even hot you a scooty-puff so you can watch me ride all the rides in the park!"

- Jr, probably.

 

[p1138]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=WXPYEqyN-tE
Jack talks to the dum dum who sent the audio equipment for 30 minutes

LOL, Jack is going to be building a new studio? Not just a kitchen studio but a podcast studio and another set like a latenight talk show?

For some reason Jack hates the blue snowball mic, something about it being brittle? no fucking idea.

His mind is blown by these cheap mics being $100 and $130. Apparently a great feature of a mic is how sensitive it is, like being able to hear tapping on the table... you know something people normally try and cut out.

Jack named it F as in Frank because his mom would phonetically spell scalfani to people on the phone who couldn't understand her and he thought it was funny.

Brazilian food is the best food in California? Did he actually go to any brazilian places?

Jack points out he knows his comments claim he's the worst cook ever.

Jack doesn't know any Brazilian dishes, after claiming that Brazilian food was the best in CA, and then doesn't know the basic starters at a brazilian bbq place.

Apparently a mute button on the mic is the best thing ever because it works great.

Jack claims he tried to surf in Huntington Beach as a kid, talks about his testicles for a full minute, and how he never surfed again. And that's like Jr. getting a skateboard and not skateboarding. But Tahiti has backwards waves?

Bunch of jabbering about random shit

Fatty claims that he couldn't get mexican food in TN that didn't just taste like ketchup when he moved there but NOW suddenly mexican food there is great. Yeah, I'm sure Jack totally had something to do with that.

Jack is happy he's friends with robert earl's BBQ in long beach, after having to ask siri about the name of the place because he forgot. Then starts talking about some tony's little italy pizza place for chicago deep dish in CA, even though he had no idea wtf a deep dish was when he was in Chicago.

"If people stand near me long enough, they start talking about food"

Back to getting this knock off audio gear guy to "be on his show" asking him to get a recipe from his parents or whatever. Guy has been trying to avoid that the entire time. "can't be as bad as me, I'm still learning, every time I do a new a recipe I've never done it before so I do it live on the show and it comes out bad, comes out good, it's always a surprise" trying to get the audio guy to join him, dude still doesn't want to be on his show.

Jack then ends the video begging the audio salesman to keep sending him new products and that Jack will promote him on social media.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Brazilian food is the best food in California? Did he actually go to any brazilian places?

To be fair, most of what most people know about Brazilian food is either:
a) Brazilian barbecue/churrasco (grilled meat, served directly on your plate until you cry uncle);
b) Feijoada (a hearty stew made of black beans and EVERYTHING PORK, not too different from a cassoulet or fabada asturiana).

Either one is pretty damn close to the idea of heaven for a Wendigo host like Jack. It's hardly surprising he'd choose it as the best food in California, regardless of how good it actually is, because mit == gud.

 

[salmonellajack]

F as in Frank has 575 subscribers and he is going to build a studio?

 

[p1138]

F as in Frank has 575 subscribers and he is going to build a studio?

2 sets, plus a kitchen set. He wants to build a set like The Tonight Show for the live guests he thinks he's known for? And somehow he's going to build this on whatever property they're buying in TN?

 

[Boys Club Rhetoric]

I

"Hey honey, I know you just had a pretty nasty health scare, but I know what will make you feel better! A vacation roughly 10 hours away from home! We even hot you a scooty-puff so you can watch me ride all the rides in the park!"

- Jr, probably.

I'll give him a tiny amount of benefit of doubt that the trip was already planned - and then snatch it away, because these idiots probably didn't think of playing it safe and getting cancellation insurance, because what could possibly ever go wrong in life?

Although even if they had to eat the cost of the trip, most loving husbands would absolutely do that without a second thought while their wife is still recovering from major surgery.

 

[TestTubePuppy]

I think he means Argentinian food, not Brazilian. There are several really good Argentinian restaurants in Los Angeles. Peruvian too.

 

[Boys Club Rhetoric]

Jack has garnered yet another review, this time for thread favorite, Aunt Myrna's Party Cheese Salad

 

[draculapenis]

Those shoulders are hilariously scrawny. I think its clear that Big T has more "T " than Jack.

He’s getting more of that droopy, melted candle look that obese American boomers get as they age and their muscles fully atrophy. Hopefully this means he’ll be dead soon.

 

[Aunt Carol]

He’s getting more of that droopy, melted candle look that obese American boomers get as they age and their muscles fully atrophy. Hopefully this means he’ll be dead soon.

Psychically sustained by our hatred, Jack's endgame is going to be an eternal undeath like that Warhammer dude, except the golden throne is a mall scooter surrounded by smokers, barbecues and Chineseium cookware.

 

[She Brings The Rain]

Psychically sustained by our hatred, Jack's endgame is going to be an eternal undeath like that Warhammer dude, except the golden throne is a mall scooter surrounded by smokers, barbecues and Chineseium cookware.

Much like the Lich Queen is sustained by people asking how she hasn't died yet, so is Jack fueled by us betting when he will die.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

Jack has garnered yet another review, this time for thread favorite, Aunt Myrna's Party Cheese Salad

https://youtube.com/watch?v=OBns3px2EPA

As he said, it's possible to make something good with some of those flavors. I mean the bell peppers, celery, nuts, real lemon juice. You can use that as a base for an actual salad or maybe even a side dish of sorts. But once you add the rest of the shit it's just beyond nasty.

The weirdest thing to me is how Jagoff seems to think Cool Whip is real whipped cream. The main ingredient is hydrogenated oil like you find in margarine. He says not to use the "fake stuff" which... is Cool Whip.

 

[TheTractor]

 

[p1138]

The weirdest thing to me is how Jagoff seems to think Cool Whip is real whipped cream. The main ingredient is hydrogenated oil like you find in margarine. He says not to use the "fake stuff" which... is Cool Whip.

I've run into that before, even specifically with cool whip. Of course those people probably have taste buds on par with fatty. It's actually led to arguments, which of course aren't worth having with those people. If I had to make some assumptions, it's probably based off of 1950s-70s consumerism(thinking about the ages of the people I know who believe this shit and considering their parents probably crammed it down their throats) where shit became THE name brand and all other versions are inferior. Cool Whip, Country Crock, Miracle Whip, stuff like that. The reason I think it stems from the 50s-70s is post ww2, basically fake products(which those 3 all are just oil based versions of what they're trying to mimic) got some heavy marketing with cheap prices and availability that over a couple generations managed to delude people into thinking they're a premium product. Hell, even into the 80s and 90s those three products were marketed heavily on TV commercials and other media. My own family used to buy that shit insisting that everything else was inferior "because the TV said so"(and I fucking hate miracle whip) and we all know jackoff watches TV constantly. It's lower middle class white trash "name brand gourmet".

 

[L. Ron Hubbard's Cat]

I've run into that before, even specifically with cool whip. Of course those people probably have taste buds on par with fatty. It's actually led to arguments, which of course aren't worth having with those people. If I had to make some assumptions, it's probably based off of 1950s-70s consumerism(thinking about the ages of the people I know who believe this shit and considering their parents probably crammed it down their throats) where shit became THE name brand and all other versions are inferior. Cool Whip, Country Crock, Miracle Whip, stuff like that. The reason I think it stems from the 50s-70s is post ww2, basically fake products(which those 3 all are just oil based versions of what they're trying to mimic) got some heavy marketing with cheap prices and availability that over a couple generations managed to delude people into thinking they're a premium product. Hell, even into the 80s and 90s those three products were marketed heavily on TV commercials and other media. My own family used to buy that shit insisting that everything else was inferior "because the TV said so"(and I fucking hate miracle whip) and we all know jackoff watches TV constantly. It's lower middle class white trash "name brand gourmet".

He says not to use the "fake stuff" which... is Cool Whip.

I thought he meant, "make sure it's not the low-fat kind". Maybe I'm just surrounded by a particular fatty subculture, but around here the "real stuff" is the full fat/full sugar/full sodium variety of a given product. "Fake stuff" is like the fat-free sour cream and other horrors you see sometimes.

 

[captkrisma]

I also saw a recipe the other day for something that had components of Party Cheese Salad, but not all there.

Watergate Salad is made from pistachio jello pudding, crushed pineapple, cool whip, and some crushed up walnuts. It was apparently very popular back in the 70's. Aunt Myrna likely had some dementia moment and added the rest.