DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[KD6-3.7]

So over the last week or so, during lunch or dinner, I’ve been watching Tevin’s restreams of Phil’s Modern Warfare multiplayer sessions (I find the lengths he’ll go with his excuses to be fascinating and pathetic and hilarious), and I noticed something... Phil rarely complained at all about lag during MW matches. Hell, the one I just watched, he didn’t mention it once. Oh, he did the usual excuses after almost every death, but they were different than his Black Ops Cold War excuses. In Modern Warfare, he just said the gameplay was terrible, or he would say he hit the enemy several times and they didn’t die (which you could run back and verify that Phil barely hit the enemy, or didn’t hit them at all), and complain about “unrealistic hit detection.” And he’d complain about “unrealistic” weapons like the throwing knife and the thermite grenade.

Phil has said several times during Cold War streams that he HATED Modern Warfare because of the lag and the shitty gameplay, but comparing the level of complaints between the two, he bitched much less about Modern Warfare during his streams. If a new viewer dropped in on his Cold War stream for ten minutes, he’d get the impression that Phil absolutely despised the game.

There is just no rhyme or reason to any of Phil’s takes on anything. It just seems to random and without logic. I know this isn’t any kind of revelation. It’s just sometimes when you notice one of Phil’s most absurd quirks plainly laid out, it’s hard not to talk about it.

 

[YokuNama]

So, Phil just responded to that tweet from Rich:

Finally someone with a following grew some balls and said what needs to be said.

Phil honestly thinks people are jealous of him. What's there to be jealous of? He scams his fans into making 5 figures a year and every other stream when he doesn't hit his obnoxious tip goal he goes into pathetic beg mode. He has absolutely nothing to show for the money he is making. He's too greedy to pay the government or go on vacation, he's to lazy to come up with creative ways to generate more revenue, so what does he do? Blow his money on gatcha games and then get on Discord to gloat about it to a bunch of random people on the internet. The difference with all these Youtube lolcows that drum up drama is I know LTG is a decent person outside the internet. I know Wings is a decent person outside the internet. I know Rich is a decent person outside the internet. Phil isn't playing a character. He's a piece of shit on the internet and in real life who's only motive is to prove he's more successful, friend or foe, than anyone he's in conversation with.

John Rambo said it best. As we get older, who has the newest game console or who has the most money doesn't matter when nobody likes you. I'd rather make $40,000 and have friends and family around me than make $115,000 and be stuck in the house playing video games all day everyday at 40 years old.

 

[JamFlowMan]

Absolutely. Besides the obvious lapses in gameplay during the streaming time like prestream and breaks, if you add up all the time he stops the gameplay to update the leaderboard, read tips, call someone in chat an idiot, rant about nothingburgers, or just beg for tips it's a huge time sink.

It's what helped stretch out the RE3 remake to something ridiculous like 15 hours so this seems par for the course. Hell I was shocked to see he's still playing Nier since I beat it and had far less time to play the game then he has.

 

[BlackDragoons]

So over the last week or so, during lunch or dinner, I’ve been watching Tevin’s restreams of Phil’s Modern Warfare multiplayer sessions (I find the lengths he’ll go with his excuses to be fascinating and pathetic and hilarious), and I noticed something... Phil rarely complained at all about lag during MW matches. Hell, the one I just watched, he didn’t mention it once. Oh, he did the usual excuses after almost every death, but they were different than his Black Ops Cold War excuses. In Modern Warfare, he just said the gameplay was terrible, or he would say he hit the enemy several times and they didn’t die (which you could run back and verify that Phil barely hit the enemy, or didn’t hit them at all), and complain about “unrealistic hit detection.” And he’d complain about “unrealistic” weapons like the throwing knife and the thermite grenade.

Phil has said several times during Cold War streams that he HATED Modern Warfare because of the lag and the shitty gameplay, but comparing the level of complaints between the two, he bitched much less about Modern Warfare during his streams. If a new viewer dropped in on his Cold War stream for ten minutes, he’d get the impression that Phil absolutely despised the game.

There is just no rhyme or reason to any of Phil’s takes on anything. It just seems to random and without logic. I know this isn’t any kind of revelation. It’s just sometimes when you notice one of Phil’s most absurd quirks plainly laid out, it’s hard not to talk about it.

Phil is getting older and its a logically conclusing that the older you get the more you bitch about shit regardless of the severity.

Also mind you Phil has that disease in the one episode of Star Trek where you age rapidly.

 

[Flavius Anthemius]

LOL FUCKING BURNED

phil the guy who claims how viewers nad other people dont need to know about his personal fucking life and get lean in banned constantly moans and whines about his personal life finances

Phil it's just like all the trolling! If you don't want any of that negative toxic behaviour, then don't bring any attention to it and let it fester in your community!

Something tells me that you want people to know about these things to shed your own personal opinion on the matter, funny that.

Rich read you like a book, don't respond and just walk away with your tail in-between your legs like the coward you are, or better yet please embarrass yourself even more, and prove my point that you do bring about drama all upon yourself in an effort to make yourself feel good and live up to your to "king of hate" moniker.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Speaking of gin tweets, he also made a Certified Dave Classic dumbfuck comment where he's bitching about those stupid nudniks beating the game quicker than him which means that they're wrong since Phil is the Infallible Human Who Is Always Correct™
Ver archivo adjunto 2154040
I mean for fuck's sake, a friend of mine asked me to watch (or at least listen and shoot the shit) his streams of RE Village and it took him 2 streams to beat the game, at 11 hours. That friend is also really meticulous when it comes to bumping into every wall and examining every room for hidden and optional items and shit, even on first playthroughs. However, even he can't compare to the King of Stalling.

Did Mr. Not a childrens entertainer send out this gay tweet actually believing it was targeted at adults?

 

[Serf 'n' TERF]

Phil honestly thinks people are jealous of him.

I bet he was an annoying little bastard in school who got shit from other kids all the time. I bet when he went home, his parents told him that he only gets picked on because tHe BuLlIeS aRe JuSt JeAlOuS. I bet that then played a huge part in him cruising through life attributing any form of criticism to hater jealousy.

That's why I absolutely despise the jealousy excuse. It does nothing but instil arrogance, not confidence - there's a difference.

 

[Martys_not_smarty]

So, Phil just responded to that tweet from Rich:

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Edit: And Rich responded

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Piggy 101 when in a catfight on twitter: if they're younger than you even if it's less than a year he calls them kid, if they're older or more educated or make more money he goes to the "using quotation marks in a feeble attempt to de-legitimize" case in point Rekita the "so called lawyer".

 

[Jasper2K]

Ver archivo adjunto 2154036

Piglet has nothing to say after that. Drinking Gin and internally crying while acting like a big boy infront of his wife.

 

[King of Not Playing Games]

I see he has time to post banal garbage on twitter but no time to set up BTTV or work on getting his YouTube channel set up.

 

[gaarashatan]

ive never been one for fighting games, but mk11 looked fun. downloading it now. cant wait to play it and act like phil

DROPPED INPUT DOOD!
I WAS BLAHKING!
HES BUTTON MASHING!

dont forget to tip guys, i rly need them. for my hulk hog---i mean controllers. cause these are just so shit dood!

 

[SauceRyuKen]

Speaking of gin tweets, he also made a Certified Dave Classic dumbfuck comment where he's bitching about those stupid nudniks beating the game quicker than him which means that they're wrong since Phil is the Infallible Human Who Is Always Correct™
Ver archivo adjunto 2154040
I mean for fuck's sake, a friend of mine asked me to watch (or at least listen and shoot the shit) his streams of RE Village and it took him 2 streams to beat the game, at 11 hours. That friend is also really meticulous when it comes to bumping into every wall and examining every room for hidden and optional items and shit, even on first playthroughs. However, even he can't compare to the King of Stalling.

I honestly couldn't put up with his maximum stalling today. I saw him drunkenly stagger through castle Dimitrescu, in spite of very obviously knowing where EVERYTHING is and the solutions to puzzles in a literal second, so he's OBVIOUSLY read a guide, repeat the same exact canned comments over and over and over again, and was the fuck outta there.

That said, this tweet takes me way back to when I was a fresh faced detractor and couldn't fathom that Phil REALLY was that bad, dumb, toxic, shallow and shitty as a person in general. Oh wook at babby Phillums and his hoogie woogie alkie bloat chubby, shiny, bacon-sweaty cheeks. He thinks he's peopleeee and his gameplay's like everyone elseeee's! Isn't that cuuuute?

He's gotta be taking the piss now. He has to be. Phil, you lazy fuck, a normal human can literally beat TWO games in the tame it takes you to beat ONE game. It's been tested during your Super Mario marathon! I'm pretty sure we could beat Re8 AND Re7 in less than it'll take you to get to the midpoint of 8, even if we played on Hardcore and you stuck to Standard. Pick up the damn pace!

 

[Who Can Say]

Phil lives in a bubble, a hellish bubble of his own making that will ultimately be his downfall. Thanks to the bubble, not only does he not take any criticism to heart, but he has successfully repackaged all his worst and miserable traits into something noble, admirable. He's not a lazy slob who refuses to evolve and put any work into his job, instead he's a guy who "sticks to his guns" and plays the games organically, without any bullshit editing. He's not a toxic personality who drives people away from him and then shittalks them afterwards, instead he's a fair, open guy who never gets directly told when he's being an asshole, which automatically clears him of any fault. Phil doesn't hate his fans even though he lashes out at them pretty much every stream, instead he respects them because he says he does. You have to listen to hiiim. His daily massive greed-fueled speeches are totally appropriate because the trolls ruined his life and it wasn't his fault, he has to lie about his cat and wedding to protect his family, its totally not sociopathic to bring up his "dying" parents through fake tears during one of his begging speeches, he's totally not balding.

WAKE THE FUCK UP PHIL. I know you're reading this.

You are a walking contradiction. Realize this and be free. How can you be the realest motherfucker on the internet when you constantly lie and obfuscate the truth from your fans. How can you say you don't want drama on your streams when you constantly shittalk other internet personalities under the guise of "just stating facts". How can you say you're not as bland as those other youtubers/streamers when you've introduced a new segment into your stream where you talk about gaming news, and its just another soapbox for you to rant about immoral reviewers and bring up drama. You're one of the most uninformed people when it comes to the industry even though you've been doing this for 12+ years, AND YOU STILL RUN YOUR MOUTH. Maybe don't get all your news from twitter. Phil, think about the era when you and Rambo were friends. And then you had a falling out. Was he really the bad guy? You know him, was he really the unreasonable one?
You're almost 40, bro. If you don't do something about your life, one day a wave of introspection will hit you like a god damn tsunami and fuck your shit up properly unless you take charge yourself, and who knows where you'll be at that time. Probably on some obscure chinese streaming site, trying to make ends meet, maybe rebranding yourself as "grandpa gamer", your mommy's good but ultimately discarded advice forever reverberating in your head. Break the spell and for once stop being the victim.

 

[Ol' Slag]

I hope things turn around for Phil and he starts hitting those 400 dollar daily goals.

 

[actually]

There is just no rhyme or reason to any of Phil’s takes on anything.

It's whatever is most convenient for him at the given moment. A perfect example of this is his "Top 10 Best Games" lists--he will act like he praised the games effusively while having called them trash and (often) having rage/wagequit them.

 

[tomstone]

it took me ~3,5h to get to the first boss and im definitely not rushing through the game. phil is just playing it extra slow because the game puts the paypigs in a perfect milking mood.

 

[KD6-3.7]

Phil lives in a bubble, a hellish bubble of his own making that will ultimately be his downfall. Thanks to the bubble, not only does he not take any criticism to heart, but he has successfully repackaged all his worst and miserable traits into something noble, admirable. He's not a lazy slob who refuses to evolve and put any work into his job, instead he's a guy who "sticks to his guns" and plays the games organically, without any bullshit editing. He's not a toxic personality who drives people away from him and then shittalks them afterwards, instead he's a fair, open guy who never gets directly told when he's being an asshole, which automatically clears him of any fault. Phil doesn't hate his fans even though he lashes out at them pretty much every stream, instead he respects them because he says he does. You have to listen to hiiim. His daily massive greed-fueled speeches are totally appropriate because the trolls ruined his life and it wasn't his fault, he has to lie about his cat and wedding to protect his family, its totally not sociopathic to bring up his "dying" parents through fake tears during one of his begging speeches, he's totally not balding.

WAKE THE FUCK UP PHIL. I know you're reading this.

You are a walking contradiction. Realize this and be free. How can you be the realest motherfucker on the internet when you constantly lie and obfuscate the truth from your fans. How can you say you don't want drama on your streams when you constantly shittalk other internet personalities under the guise of "just stating facts". How can you say you're not as bland as those other youtubers/streamers when you've introduced a new segment into your stream where you talk about gaming news, and its just another soapbox for you to rant about immoral reviewers and bring up drama. You're one of the most uninformed people when it comes to the industry even though you've been doing this for 12+ years, AND YOU STILL RUN YOUR MOUTH. Maybe don't get all your news from twitter. Phil, think about the era when you and Rambo were friends. And then you had a falling out. Was he really the bad guy? You know him, was he really the unreasonable one?
You're almost 40, bro. If you don't do something about your life, one day a wave of introspection will hit you like a god damn tsunami and fuck your shit up properly unless you take charge yourself, and who knows where you'll be at that time. Probably on some obscure chinese streaming site, trying to make ends meet, maybe rebranding yourself as "grandpa gamer", your mommy's good but ultimately discarded advice forever reverberating in your head. Break the spell and for once stop being the victim.

The fact that Phil’s “career” is on the shakiest ground it’s been on since he started streaming, and he still refuses to attempt to improve his stream in any way just shows how mentally and physically lazy he is. The only thing he has done is up the daily tips goal and whine and complain more.

Deep down, I still don’t think it’s really hit him that his “career” isn’t sustainable. Phil has NEVER had a “rock bottom” moment in his entire life, or a time when life just completely kicked his ass with a devastating loss or a close encounter with death, or just any truly trying time. Things like that build character. They make you take a long, hard look at yourself. I’d really love to get an insight into how Phil was raised. I wish someone from his middle school/high school days would come forward (with some proof, first off) and give us some stories. I imagine Phil was bailed out of every problem by his parents.

If Phil ever does get to the point where he improves the quality of his stream, and starts trying new things, it’ll be too late for him. As long as he feels that there is some way he can wriggle out of his situation for another year or so, he’s not gonna do anything that requires the least bit effort. There will always be an excuse.

Phil is fascinating to me because I’ve known people throughout my life who have had extremely similar quirks, just never at this extreme level, and all of those quirks have never been in just one person.

 

[DontEatSilicaGel]

Also mind you Phil has that disease in the one episode of Star Trek where you age rapidly.

ToS S2E12 - The Deadly Years

Didn't even need to look that up. Or Stargate SG-1 S1E8 "Brief Candle". Bit of an odd name, though that was related to nanites and you can't be exposed to them if you don't leave the house. I prefer SG-1 over ToS. I'm going to hell.

...should probably have gone with The X-Files S02E19 Død Kalm (one of my preferred episodes). That's when the main characters get stuck on a boat with a water supply that causes a sort of premature aging. They realise it's actually a build up of sodium chloride, our good friend salt. Which they somehow reverse the effects of. So there's hope for Phils premature aging yet.

Power nerd. Unlike the loser geeks that watch shit like Big Bang Theory.

 

[SauceRyuKen]

Public petition to our incredibly talented and super duper cute moderators to include @Piece of Peace 's excellent all-revealing spreadsheet on Savings And Loan's OP, or otherwise give it visibility. The guy put in the work for everyone, and I think it could really benefit from visibility. Right now it's been highlighted in the general thread a couple times, but Phil's thread always moves too fast for this sort of thing to remain easy to find for very long.

In the end, anyone who wants to know how much Phil really earns now that he's got almost nowhere to hide should be able to do so without sifting through pages and pages of weapons grade autism. I figure most of the thread regulars would agree.

@actually @Surly Muppet sorry for the ping and thank you for your time and for keeping the threads clean and orderly.

braces for swift LIMB destruction for backseat moderating

EDIT: Including the spreadsheet link https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1bt1lZucl2qvBjmQIZF5rPBLonQugEV8Oo7xpqN_iLQk/edit#gid=0

 

[actually]

Link added to the Savings and Loan thread.