3/28/2021 - Chris's latest fender bender

Used a burner number to ask chris. So Chris backed up into a truck last sunday, but somehow he got the money to fix it at a local body shop. Not sure if its the praetor money,insurance or what not. But then proceeds to dream for 20k to buy the same new car because even he knows that his and barb's credit scores are fucked.

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Does Chris even have driver's lisence? With that many fuck ups I doubt he'll have that for long
 
Does Chris even have driver's lisence? With that many fuck ups I doubt he'll have that for long
Yeah it's hard to believe he still does as of this post. Then again the road is full of idiots so he's hardly outstanding in that regard.
 
Does Chris even have driver's lisence? With that many fuck ups I doubt he'll have that for long

Aside from him running Snyder over, he just gets into fender benders from what I remember. It seems like every year he backs up into somebody. And no one is going to call the cops unless he decides to leave the scene and someone decides to be vindictive. I'm pretty sure he backed up into someone and drove off but the cops came knocking a few years back. Which makes me wonder how often he backs up into people and just leaves.
 
His love of cocks.

Anyway, how are they going to fix the car. I doubt there's any parts for it. Are they just going to smooth it out to make it look even more like a piece of shit.
He said that the garage will be paid to replace the back hatch, so my assumption was that they had to order one from somewhere, which is why he's driving around with the window like that now. The Caravan was only discontinued like a year ago, so it shouldn't be too difficult to find one, especially considering that Dodge vehicles are generally pieces of shit and are filling up scrap yards.
 
"Eh?" is a very generous way to describe Charb's credit scores. I sincerely doubt that either of them could get any sort of loan whatsoever, except for maybe a 300%+ payday loan or something. When that shitty, 20 y/o Dodge finally bites the dust, Chris is either going to have to walk to Sheetz/Food Lion/Goodwill, or they're going to be throwing down like $1K for an ancient clunker once or twice a year.


That's Son-chu 4.0 or 5.0 at this point.
that Dodge MUST have been bought used from someone who has previously took good care of that van. No fucking way a Dodge can survive 20 years under Chandler abuse. Hell, I think even a Honda or Toyota would struggle to survive two decades from such people who treat their cars like garbage.
 
that Dodge MUST have been bought used from someone who has previously took good care of that van. No fucking way a Dodge can survive 20 years under Chandler abuse. Hell, I think even a Honda or Toyota would struggle to survive two decades from such people who treat their cars like garbage.
Maybe they managed to actually find a decent mechanic in the area and manages to fix it up to a roadworthy standard, in case it's been damaged from his driving errors before.
 
No fucking way a Dodge can survive 20 years under Chandler abuse. Hell, I think even a Honda or Toyota would struggle to survive two decades from such people who treat their cars like garbage.
Do we even have confirmation that Chris gets his oil changed on the recommended interval of every 3 to 5 thousand miles? Chris definitely strikes me as one of those ‘tards who never change their oil until their engine finally seizes and they’re stranded, his only saving grace might be the fact that the car needs to go to the mechanic every 6 months or so and may get an oil change then.
Chris would greatly bennefit of having a backwards camera or parking sensors, but his current living style will never let him have even a cheap one.
Chris is a goddess, why would he need to install a camera when it should be relatively easy to summon a fairy or garden gnome to guide him out of his space while keeping an eye on traffic.
 
Not A-Logging but how is he still allowed to fucking drive?!

Since it appears Chris has had multiple fender benders from backing into shit, I'm going to run off the assumption that all of these accidents are occuring in parking lots: police (in general) won't do police reports and cannot cite for traffic violations in parking lots. Now, if he's blowing through stop signs, merging into other lanes, and being a general spaz in traffic, that's another thing. A cop might cite him if he causes an accident.

Then again, if you were the responding cop, you'd probably just take down the evidence of the crash and jet as quickly as possible, because who'd honestly want to sit to Chris rambling on about whatever while you're giving them a ticket for failure to yield?

Unless you're getting multiple DUIs, getting reckless driving charges, or you're causing multiple bodily injury accidents, it is incredibly difficult to lose your license. If you're just backing in to things, you're good.

Now, do I think Chris has the mental capacity to drive? Lol, no, but good luck with that. In today's environment of tardpowerment, it is going to be a hard sell to suspend or revoke his license based off his mental acuity.

With no DUIs and no total losses/BI claims on his record (that we're aware of), there's not much hope he will be priced out of car insurance. The standard risk companies out there have probably at best priced him out and at worst just reject him, while the non standard carriers like Progressive or The General (lol) will write him all day long. It's possible he could even be on the state FAIR plan. Probably expensive, definitely state minimums, but won't stop him from backing into the next 53" trailer.
 
Obligatory edit.

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