Law Florida man in nothing but breathalyzer novelty boxer shorts gets a DUI - also had condoms, binoculars, and a penis ring

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/drunk/breathalyer-boxer-man-278593

APRIL 17--A Florida Man arrested early Thursday on a drunk driving charge was in his underwear behind the wheel, according to cops who noted that the suspect's drawers were imprinted with the word “breathalyzer” and the phrase “blow here,” which was “near his genitals.”

After spotting a Dodge pickup truck weaving on a Port St. Lucie highway around 3 AM, a cop pulled the vehicle over outside a Best Western hotel, according to an arrest affidavit.

The driver, Daryle Lee Campbell, was handcuffed due to his “furtive actions and for officer safety.” Campbell, 54, had been spotted throwing a “black object” from his truck, though the item was not recovered by police.

During questioning, Campbell claimed that he was en route to help a friend who had a flat tire. Campbell--barefoot and in his underwear--seemed jittery, was unsteady on his feet, and appeared “under the influence of a stimulant,” the affidavit notes. After Campbell declined to perform field sobriety tests, he was arrested on a DUI charge.

An inventory of Campbell’s ride turned up a “penis ring” in the truck’s center console, as well as “several condoms about the vehicle and binoculars sitting on the passenger seat.” Cops concluded that Campbell may have been “attempting to attract prostitutes in the area or other lewd and lascivious behavior.”

Though clad in novelty underwear, Campbell “had his hair gelled and combed.” While Campbell’s drawers were not further described by investigators, they were likely similar to the silky boxers seen below.

Campbell’s rap sheet includes two prior drunk driving convictions, police noted. Court records show that he has also been convicted of carrying a concealed weapon, cocaine possession, and resisting arrest.
 
My home state (pic related) is still the best state right after the state of Euphoria.

Alright Texas I see you, but we're definitely top 10.

Sigh.

Florida.jpg
 
Hte guy was on his way to have some really good time, had a few drinks and the cops arrest him. That's some serious dick move. They should have escort him.
 
I'm kinda curious as to what the black object is that he thought it would be too incriminating to be caught with, since he was chill with the idea of the cops finding his cock-ring and bag of mystery white powder that turned out not be drugs.
 
I'm kinda curious as to what the black object is that he thought it would be too incriminating to be caught with, since he was chill with the idea of the cops finding his cock-ring and bag of mystery white powder that turned out not be drugs.
You know the answer. Why even ask?
 
This is the best fucking way to get arrested in Florida, Seth Macfarlane needs to get sued for plagiarizing Floridas own comedy shitshow.
 
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