💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votos: 7 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votos: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votos: 17 1.1%
  • August-September 2024

    Votos: 34 2.1%
  • October-November 2024

    Votos: 37 2.3%
  • December 2024

    Votos: 44 2.8%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votos: 255 15.9%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votos: 264 16.5%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votos: 936 58.5%

  • Total de votantes
    1,600
Restaurant quality when no restaurant techniques were used. That linguini looks undercooked, he dumped cold precooked packaged seafood straight into his watered down sauce... The amount of black peppers he used's way off too, he sure as shit didn't toast them on a pan before dumping it on the blender

Absolutely awful
 
Restaurant quality when no restaurant techniques were used. That linguini looks undercooked, he dumped cold precooked packaged seafood straight into his watered down sauce... The amount of black peppers he used's way off too, he sure as shit didn't toast them on a pan before dumping it on the blender

Absolutely awful
Yeah everything about the sneeznings he dumped into the blender shocked. Huge clump of salt falling in with the rest, what appeared to be an entire cup of dried italian herbs, another whole cup of whole black peppercorns for some reason, just a total hot mess and the resulting 'sauce' that he ladled over the pasta was like a soup.
 
ust a total hot mess and the resulting 'sauce' that he ladled over the pasta was like a soup.
This is one of my biggest peeves when i see people like Jack making pasta. Just dumping the sauce on top of the pasta instead of properly incorporating it. You make the pasta al dente (his is undercooked), then you toss them with olive oil, and a little butter and starch water if needed, so you emulsify the sauce gradually while tossing it. This coats all the pasta evenly. If you just plop it over the pasta you'll have bits without flavor, and presentation looks sloppy

He could at least sear a bit the seafood mix separately, then toss the pasta on the pan with the sauce. His process is all wrong
 
Trannies DDoSed the site right after this was uploaded. Coincidence? How far does the rabbit hole go?

Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) (Seafood linguine)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=A33RmYeh0zc
Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) [A33RmYeh0zc].webm

Maybe it's just because Jack's videos have been so boring lately, but I think this is one of his "best" in a long time. I can't even imagine how awful this sauce must taste, even before he dumped the Great Value Seafood Mix juice into it.
linguini is plural you absolute gorilla giganigger

0:36 foodjax...I kind of... feel bad. I don't like hating on the disabled. This feels like making fun of a tard for not doing the shapes thing. I mean like god bless him he's trying. In a scootypuff.

2:40 THE TAMBEAST AWA-- oh, no, just Jack.

I wanna see Jack drunk. I really do. I want him to go balls-deep on the stupid lifestyle he's been living. I want him to blame niggers and ragheads for all the ills in the world. I want him to go Cooking with Merrill, hot mic style. "I hate this fucking nigger shit."

7:50 "i'm not a disabled triplaplegic"

8:44it's RICOT' (as in, reekot) you subhumnan

9:34 tongue.

..........8.5/10.Jack doing what he loves. Doing his best despite his disabilities.

Have a Like you fat piece of shit.
 
Trannies DDoSed the site right after this was uploaded. Coincidence? How far does the rabbit hole go?

Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) (Seafood linguine)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=A33RmYeh0zc
Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) [A33RmYeh0zc].webm

Maybe it's just because Jack's videos have been so boring lately, but I think this is one of his "best" in a long time. I can't even imagine how awful this sauce must taste, even before he dumped the Great Value Seafood Mix juice into it.
That looked disgusting but the question is, what was with the wine?

If you're cooking with seafood you want low tannins in your wine. Sure a Merlot would work but not a Bordeaux. That's a wine region and not a type but most Bordeaux have heavy tannins meaning your seafood sauce will have an unpleasant almost metallic aftertaste. The iodine in the fish clashes with the tannins. Something fruity, light and of course with light tannins would be the way to go. Or just use a white.

My guess is it's the cheapest wine they could get and didn't have an actual clue in their heads.

That linguini looks just awful
Everything he makes looks awful.
 
I mean, they bought Yellowtail, so "cheapest wine they could get" is an absolute given.
The funniest thing about Yellowtail is how it was originally made for the foreign market. While made in Australia it was never sold there until years later.

There were stories of American tourists walking into a bottle shop and asking where the Yellowtail was and the staff having no idea what they were talking about. I mean you have great Australian wineries and they fucking choose Yellowtail over something by Peter Lehmann or even Wolf Blass?
 
Trannies DDoSed the site right after this was uploaded. Coincidence? How far does the rabbit hole go?

Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) (Seafood linguine)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=A33RmYeh0zc
Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) [A33RmYeh0zc].webm

Maybe it's just because Jack's videos have been so boring lately, but I think this is one of his "best" in a long time. I can't even imagine how awful this sauce must taste, even before he dumped the Great Value Seafood Mix juice into it.
 
Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) (Seafood linguine)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=A33RmYeh0zc
Crazy that this was the glamour shot he chose

If he tried to AI-enhance it for the thumbnail ChatGPT would interpret it as gore and block it
Capture+_2026-07-18-16-17-58-1.png
 
Jack dragging his dead mother through the mud by blaming her for everything he's doing while straining to reach the top of a countertop blender from his wheelchair just rubs me the wrong way. I guarantee he asked his phone for that recipe and still got it wrong. Even that spoon he got from Rob is laughing at his ineptitude in cooking and wine resulting in combining them ineptly.

You know he was seething over Tammy pointing out that adding a pound of ice to his sauce made it runny (EVERYONE NEEDS A TAMMY!). It's infuriating that Jack tells us we can choose to instead thaw and drain the seafood prior to dumping it into the pot; because it speaks to the matter of why in the hell he presumes to have any business teaching us how to make this dish in the first place.

There's not a single objective standard he's willing to hold himself to; because they cause Jack to hurt his own feelings. Yet the obvious consequence of that is everything he does being a mystifying failure in the eyes of anyone who isn't him. Jack's unwillingness to relate to the external world in any way other than relegating it to function as his conscience and sense of intellectual accountability results in him resenting the world and then rationalizing it as the world's fault for disappointing his expectation for it to change to suit him.

"All that steam is moisture coming out." THANKS FOR EXPLAINING THAT, JACK. "Hold on- Don't 'wanna burn my guts!." Then LET IT COOL DOWN. THIS ISN'T A LIVE BROADCAST. This fucking imbecile. And the video ends the second he's fed himself; because every video is nothing more than an excuse for him to eat things his doctors tell him not to.
 
Última edición:
He sounds like he has terminal COPD or TB and breathing through a snorkel. Even if he wasn't so stupid and inane he'd be hard to listen to.
This one has some of the worst audio/video production so far. Rolling unidentified objects in front of the camera, auto-focus on a spring, heavy breathing between every sentence and talking over maximum volume thwacking the wooden spoon on the pot.

Then he runs his fingers through the cooked pasta product. No, Jack, no!
 
Trannies DDoSed the site right after this was uploaded. Coincidence? How far does the rabbit hole go?

Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) (Seafood linguine)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=A33RmYeh0zc
Restaurant quality at home (way cheaper) [A33RmYeh0zc].webm

Maybe it's just because Jack's videos have been so boring lately, but I think this is one of his "best" in a long time. I can't even imagine how awful this sauce must taste, even before he dumped the Great Value Seafood Mix juice into it.
"linguinis with seafood"

Says his mother would use san marzano tomatoes, so he doesn't. Somehow she only seasoned 1 can of tomatoes? If she had the sense to use garlic powder instead of garlic salt... how did Fatty end up so fucking retarded? Adds too much onion powder, doesn't remove any. Whole ass peppercorns in a tomato smoothie holy shit someone's just going to chip a tooth. This fucking guy used like an entire cup of italian seasoning? He fucking sneezin'd it till it was brown. Using beef makes it taste different than seafood? You don't say?

Here's a basic fucking sauce for anyone that needs it

Back to Fatty's bullshit.

He talks about simmering the sauce? And the sneezening actually flavoring the sauce if you simmer it? What universe is this?

Adds wine to sauce to make it less acidic? Ok, back to being fucking stupid. Dumps the frozen seafood into the sauce immediately cooling it down. "I bought 2 bags, I'm not eating pasta I'm eating seafood". Fatty understands that his frozen seafood watered his sauce down? Again, it's like he has more than one neuron firing, but then thinks simmering for another 10 minutes will fix it. Half hour maybe.

"Hold on, don't want to burn my guts" So now he's not even just burning his mouth anymore at this point, but his intestines when he swallows hot food? Does he really have so few working nerves left in his head? And for not wanting pasta and to eat the seafood, gets no seafood on the fork. "I haven't had calamari in a while" YOU JUST HAD IT LIKE TWO WEEKS AGO YOU RETARDED FAT FUCK.
 
Why would anyone choose NOT to use San Marzanos, possibly the best tomatoes on the planet? What an idiotic choice.

And I mean obviously there's the other choice for marinara of blanching plum tomatoes a few seconds after cross-scoring a cut in the top so you can just instantly peel them. . .but someone like Jagoff would never even understand this idea.
 
Why would anyone choose NOT to use San Marzanos, possibly the best tomatoes on the planet? What an idiotic choice.

And I mean obviously there's the other choice for marinara of blanching plum tomatoes a few seconds after cross-scoring a cut in the top so you can just instantly peel them. . .but someone like Jagoff would never even understand this idea.
Even the fucking "San marzano style" tomatoes run like $4-5 a can, same as the fucking contadina brand roma tomatoes that aren't even the right variety that he used if Tammy still wanted to save a few bucks and not get the actual cans of san marzanos. Also, if you're making enough sauce to use 2 cans of tomatoes, just splurge the extra couple bucks and get the san marzanos? You can freeze the extra sauce since you can easily get a ton of servings out of this shit so $1-2 on tomatoes per serving is still cheap.
 
If you're cooking with seafood you want low tannins in your wine. Sure a Merlot would work but not a Bordeaux. That's a wine region and not a type but most Bordeaux have heavy tannins meaning your seafood sauce will have an unpleasant almost metallic aftertaste. The iodine in the fish clashes with the tannins. Something fruity, light and of course with light tannins would be the way to go. Or just use a white.
I have a tomato soup recipe I modified using a Chardonnay or Pinot Grigio in place of some of the chicken broth. White wine and tomatoes cook wonderfully, and if you’re intending to use it with seafood, it can add flavor without being overpowering. Some wines also just don’t do well when cooked, like Cabernet, which only seems to work okay for desserts. If I’m making a bolognese sauce though, a red wine like Pinot Noir is more suitable, and richer red wines are better for beef dishes.

All this stuff could be figured out using a simple internet search, and I do it when I want to add wine to certain dishes I’m making, but unsure of what type to get. I know fatty uses the internet a lot, so you’d think he would implement searching for information instead of just thinking he knows already, but that’s what makes him an entertaining lolcow.
 
It's ghoulish and pathetic that he keeps using his mom as a human shield. It's like he's preemptively trying to use her as the scapegoat for when inevitably everything he makes turns into shit.

He probably is given that this is also the same retard who takes a horrible tiktok recipe and then still tries to defend it because he made it even though he only acknowledges it as bad. Case in point the time he used cheese balls to make the cheese sauce in a mac and cheese.
 
Here's a basic fucking sauce for anyone that needs it
You can skip the tomato mill and just use some passata di pomodoro or "crushed strained tomatoes". Takes some of the work out of it. And whatever is left over you stick it in a freezer bag and throw it in the freezer until you need it.

But yeah. When I make a simple tomato sauce for pasta this is what I do. I add half the tomato and let it cook down. Then when the pasta is ready to add to the pan I add the rest of the tomatoes and the pasta. Let the pasta finish in the sauce. Take it off the heat and then add the cheese and some chopped basil to finish it off before serving.

I have a tomato soup recipe I modified using a Chardonnay or Pinot Grigio in place of some of the chicken broth. White wine and tomatoes cook wonderfully, and if you’re intending to use it with seafood, it can add flavor without being overpowering. Some wines also just don’t do well when cooked, like Cabernet, which only seems to work okay for desserts. If I’m making a bolognese sauce though, a red wine like Pinot Noir is more suitable, and richer red wines are better for beef dishes.
When cooking with a red I do find that Merlot and Pinot Noir tend to work the best. But certain recipes for stews I will use a blend of Cabernet and Merlot. Merlot for the flavor and cabernet for the backbone.

But with seafood or a tomato based dish it's always a white and yes Pinot Grigio is great for those but so is a Riesling.

He probably is given that this is also the same retard who takes a horrible tiktok recipe and then still tries to defend it because he made it even though he only acknowledges it as bad. Case in point the time he used cheese balls to make the cheese sauce in a mac and cheese.
My favorite viral recipe he made was the bread made from eggs, baking powder and tahini. He's all, "look how beautiful this is" when he pulls it out and then takes a bite only to realize that it's an utter abomination. Anybody with even the most rudimentary knowledge of cooking could tell this was going to be terrible. But not Fatty. He's so retarded he honestly thought this was going to be good.
 
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