🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

Will Ralph see Xander on November 15th?

  • Yes

  • No


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So is Mexico too expensive for him now? What's the next step a year from now, the Congo?
I know a guy who's kinda like the Rage Pig (short, fat, ugly) except without the retarded and actually successful with women, he lives in Africa due to business - he was even living in South Sudan for a while - and even he was like "Congo fucking SUCKS". So I think we'll find Ralph in Somalia eventually instead.
 
I think about the only way Nick is winning this year is if that body cam drops.
Nah, he will violate his probation and go to jail.
Ethan Ralph has some big potential with his current arc, so we will see how big of a fuckup he manages.

Being cut up live on stream by a cartel member for groping his girl is a distinct possibility.
 
Team Ralphisafuckupandlostsomethingimportantandtryingtogetitbackbeforehegetsbackonline wins again!
 
Ralph's not dead... yet.

There are worse places to go in Colombia than Medellin, but this is Ralph. A man who got beat in Lisbon, Portugal. Twice. Granted, the second time was a gunt hunt, but Ralph would have found a way. But as others have pointed out, even la policia may have it out for Ralph in Medellin. Just a quick search of recent news in English:
"Hawaiian Man Arrested in Medellín for Soliciting Sex with a Minor"

Throw in Ralph's various chemical addictions, and prison may as well be a death sentence to Ralph.

Also, whenever Ralph dies, he's going to hell.
 
"yet" if this was a book or movie we know he's going to die down there, knowing Ethan rage pig Ralph he's going to get his ass jumped again, I wonder what's going to be broken this time
 
My bets on Ralph being too poor / jewish to bribe local the police/army when trying to travel. Columbia's chief export to the world second to marching powder are mercenaries and there's plenty of corruption within the countries security forces to result in something bad happening to a fat American drug addict.
 
This idiot will end up getting scoped. Medellin is bad at the moment. A lot of different criminals from surrounding countries are going specifically to El Poblado with the intention of drugging and robbing foreigners, using scopamaline. They don't care if the gringo ends up dead, in hospital or permanently affected. Rule of Colombia is if you're getting offered pussy from women you've just met you're getting set up to be robbed, especially if he is hiring chicas from the street and bringing them back to an air bnb.

I love Colombia, but it is a minefield for idiots. Some get scoped and robbed, others walk around with obvious wealth and get shot and stabbed for it, others get into the local cocaine not realizing it hasn't been cut like the stuff they're used to and OD, others pick fights with local and end up being bashed or murdered. Some get addicted to basuco and end up walking around like zombies near Botero plaza.

Colombia is fucking fantastic if you're going to do the touristy thing or business. But if you're anyone like Ethan Ralph things can go tits up very quickly.
Having lived in Medellin for two years, I agree with everything that you said.

"No dar papaya" is a simple rule, but one that this retard absolutely won't be able to follow.
 
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